Daylight Savings Time
A couple days ago, all of us got to turn our clocks back one hour because of daylight savings time. (Or is it, because daylight savings time ended? how does this work anyways?) It's one of those things that everybody loves and nobody would ever complain about. Whenever someone finds out they get to turn back an hour on a Saturday night in October, usually a wide grin comes over their face and they are like "sweet, more sleep for me tonight."
As well they should, because you simply can't beat being able to gain an hour for no good reason. Actually, I hear the reason is because some gangsta farmers (or should I say farmahzz) bullied the government into shifting the official time for a few months of the year. But whatever the reason, I like it.
Of course, it's gonna suck in spring when we gotta "spring forward" and lose that hour right back. Most of us don't think about that until the time comes and when it does, you usually see a lot of people conveniently "forget," sleep that hour anyways, and be late to class, work, or watching Jerry Springer. That's how I am.
But this year, I am thinking of the future, months ahead, when I am gonna be robbed of a precious hour of beautyrest. So, I am thinking, we should make some drastic changes to the country to maximize the amount of wide grins and minimize the trashy daytime TV show missage.
Since everyone loves turning their clock back, and hates turning it forward, I would like to propose a plan that will eliminate the latter while multiplying the former. The math or logic minded readers out there are probably already saying, that's impossible, you can't gain an hour of time without giving it back!
Ah, but you can. See, I think every other week of the year, we should turn our clocks back one hour. That means, after a year, we will have turned our clocks back 26 times, having gained about 26 hours of sleep in the process (not to mention the many smiles that go along with such a benefit). Of course, the catch is that we lose about 1 day each year, and that we have wacked out schedules all the time (waking up when the sun goes down in the summer, for example), but that's a small price to pay. How many of us really are gonna miss that one day out of the year anyways?
Yeah, I know that 26 hours a year means that we lose more than one day a year, so for the sake of order, we would probably have to have a "leap day" every 12 years to account for this. Who cares.
Seriously, it would work. I am thinking of running for office using such a platform to build my campaign on. Since it doesn't really save daylight anymore, I guess it would have to be called "sleep savings time" or something. But I'm sure a lot of people would vote for me if it meant more sleep for them...
Monday, October 28, 2002
Saturday, October 26, 2002
ESPN.com and The Ring
You might not think it, but sometimes reading just the news headlines of ESPN.com is pretty funny. (Skip this section if you don't like sports). Today I saw a hilarious headline: "Cubs will dig deep to get Baker." Hmmm.... Interesting thought. Maybe the Cubs will dig deep, but why would they bother? Baker would be an idiot to leave the Giants for the Cubs, and anyways, the Cubs are better off hunting for their managerial positions at a temp agency, because they are gonna end up replacing whoever they get within a couple years anyways. Anyone who doesn't know by now that the simple strategy of Cubs ownership is as follows:
1. Sit around and let your team suck. Collect money from the machine known as Wrigley Field.
2. When fans finally begin to complain more, make some fake effort to get good players. Except, don't get players who are actually good, get players that used to be good, or had one good fluke season. Focus on getting old, fat, dumb closers or washed up, injury-prone outfielders and you're on the right track.
3. Though you try your best to draft as ignorantly as possible, as the Chinese saying goes, "Even a blind cat catches a dead mouse once in a while." So once in a while, you'll somehow stumble upon a young talent that brings excitement to the organization. When you have a hot sensation to work with, be sure to milk him for all he's got, so the fans will think your team is going somewhere. Either pitch him till his arm falls off, or let him develop and get good, then just shrug your shoulders when he inevitably leaves to sign with a better team (pretty much all 28 non-Chicago teams will do).
4. When the Cubs start to suck horribly again, blame it on the manager. Fire the manager and hire whoever is sucker enough to take the job.
5. Repeat steps 1-4 a few times. Once in a while, it may be advisable to change GMs in addition to the manager, so as to better mislead the fans into thinking the team is headed for better days. Tell the GM to say stuff like "I'm here to shake things up" or "We are gonna do everything in our power to make this a winning ballclub."
Ah... enough ripping on the Cubs for now. Sadly, the Sox aren't a whole lot better. As a matter of fact, Chicago fans as a whole probably suffer the worst collection of owners in the 4 major sports among all the cities in this country.
Another ESPN.com story was about the Lakers game, when Rick Fox and Doug Christie got into a shoving match on the floor, then the teams clashed in the tunnel. If whoever reading this doesn't know, Doug Christie is the guy whose picture you see when you go to a dictionary and look up "whipped." He makes up all these flaming hand signals to his wife when he's playing on the court, she doesn't "allow" him to do interviews with female reporters, and they also have a entire wedding ceremony every year on their anniversary. Here he is, getting into a scuffle with Rick Fox, who is well known as Vanessa Williams's man. Anyways, Guy-who-dropped-his-balls-somewhere-and-forgot-to-pick-them-up fights Guy-with-some-sort-of-manhood; is there any question what the result will be?
In an unrelated story, I saw The Ring earlier tonight. Pretty good movie, I actually watched the Japanese version a few years ago in Taiwan (my sister should remember because she liked to mess up her hair in front of her face like the girl in the movie), and both versions are pretty good if you're in the mood for some thrillin. It doesn't all make sense or fit together, and the acting isn't the best, but there are worse ways to spend 7 bucks these days.
Which leads me to the real reason I brought up this topic: to complain about AMC. Is it just me, or was the student discount $5.25 at AMC only a couple years ago? They have steadily raised the price where it's barely a discount anymore. I feel like some sort of middle-aged moviegoer who doesn't look like a student anymore but is too young for the senior citizen discount. Sucks.
Even worse is, that place is freaking littered with junior high kids. Seriously, I felt like I was back in the O'Neill lunchroom at that theater. Everyone was all chattering and being immature that I thought I should have pulled out a stack of detention slips and started writing kids up.
Another thing: how did this movie only get a PG-13 rating? I'm not even considering the fact that at least half the kids watching that movie there tonight did not look 13 to begin with. They looked like they should be at home playing with Barbies and reading Tiger Beat or something. But honestly, I've seen plenty of rated R movies that aren't half as disturbing as this one. I guess it explains why I didn't get asked for ID at the ticket booth though.
Kids these days... little punks, all of them.
You might not think it, but sometimes reading just the news headlines of ESPN.com is pretty funny. (Skip this section if you don't like sports). Today I saw a hilarious headline: "Cubs will dig deep to get Baker." Hmmm.... Interesting thought. Maybe the Cubs will dig deep, but why would they bother? Baker would be an idiot to leave the Giants for the Cubs, and anyways, the Cubs are better off hunting for their managerial positions at a temp agency, because they are gonna end up replacing whoever they get within a couple years anyways. Anyone who doesn't know by now that the simple strategy of Cubs ownership is as follows:
1. Sit around and let your team suck. Collect money from the machine known as Wrigley Field.
2. When fans finally begin to complain more, make some fake effort to get good players. Except, don't get players who are actually good, get players that used to be good, or had one good fluke season. Focus on getting old, fat, dumb closers or washed up, injury-prone outfielders and you're on the right track.
3. Though you try your best to draft as ignorantly as possible, as the Chinese saying goes, "Even a blind cat catches a dead mouse once in a while." So once in a while, you'll somehow stumble upon a young talent that brings excitement to the organization. When you have a hot sensation to work with, be sure to milk him for all he's got, so the fans will think your team is going somewhere. Either pitch him till his arm falls off, or let him develop and get good, then just shrug your shoulders when he inevitably leaves to sign with a better team (pretty much all 28 non-Chicago teams will do).
4. When the Cubs start to suck horribly again, blame it on the manager. Fire the manager and hire whoever is sucker enough to take the job.
5. Repeat steps 1-4 a few times. Once in a while, it may be advisable to change GMs in addition to the manager, so as to better mislead the fans into thinking the team is headed for better days. Tell the GM to say stuff like "I'm here to shake things up" or "We are gonna do everything in our power to make this a winning ballclub."
Ah... enough ripping on the Cubs for now. Sadly, the Sox aren't a whole lot better. As a matter of fact, Chicago fans as a whole probably suffer the worst collection of owners in the 4 major sports among all the cities in this country.
Another ESPN.com story was about the Lakers game, when Rick Fox and Doug Christie got into a shoving match on the floor, then the teams clashed in the tunnel. If whoever reading this doesn't know, Doug Christie is the guy whose picture you see when you go to a dictionary and look up "whipped." He makes up all these flaming hand signals to his wife when he's playing on the court, she doesn't "allow" him to do interviews with female reporters, and they also have a entire wedding ceremony every year on their anniversary. Here he is, getting into a scuffle with Rick Fox, who is well known as Vanessa Williams's man. Anyways, Guy-who-dropped-his-balls-somewhere-and-forgot-to-pick-them-up fights Guy-with-some-sort-of-manhood; is there any question what the result will be?
In an unrelated story, I saw The Ring earlier tonight. Pretty good movie, I actually watched the Japanese version a few years ago in Taiwan (my sister should remember because she liked to mess up her hair in front of her face like the girl in the movie), and both versions are pretty good if you're in the mood for some thrillin. It doesn't all make sense or fit together, and the acting isn't the best, but there are worse ways to spend 7 bucks these days.
Which leads me to the real reason I brought up this topic: to complain about AMC. Is it just me, or was the student discount $5.25 at AMC only a couple years ago? They have steadily raised the price where it's barely a discount anymore. I feel like some sort of middle-aged moviegoer who doesn't look like a student anymore but is too young for the senior citizen discount. Sucks.
Even worse is, that place is freaking littered with junior high kids. Seriously, I felt like I was back in the O'Neill lunchroom at that theater. Everyone was all chattering and being immature that I thought I should have pulled out a stack of detention slips and started writing kids up.
Another thing: how did this movie only get a PG-13 rating? I'm not even considering the fact that at least half the kids watching that movie there tonight did not look 13 to begin with. They looked like they should be at home playing with Barbies and reading Tiger Beat or something. But honestly, I've seen plenty of rated R movies that aren't half as disturbing as this one. I guess it explains why I didn't get asked for ID at the ticket booth though.
Kids these days... little punks, all of them.
Wednesday, October 23, 2002
My Momma On Losing Your Credit Card
This is already the 3rd post I have made about my mom, but she is too funny sometimes. Just now, she was telling me not to lose the credit card in her account, because it has a very high credit line. Her exact words (in Chinese) were "Make sure you don't lose the credit card, because it has a high limit, and if you do, someone might take it and go use it to go get gas for free."
Hahahahaha of all the things you could do with a stolen credit card, my mom is most afraid of people filling up their car with a tank of gas. The funny thing is that I think I remember her telling me the same thing a few years ago. Yes, you know that is the most lucrative scam for credit card thieves, they just go and drive their car around until they hit empty, and then fill up courtesy of Mrs. Chen. Soon enough those $20 spots will add up. I bet they wouldn't hesitate choose premium, either. Those bastards...
Although I must say, the last 2 times I filled up, the charge came up well over $30. As much fun as this car is to drive, it eats gas like a mofo. With me driving about 60 miles a day just to and from work, that's gonna add up.
Since this post is short, I'll post a link to take up some more of your time. Play this game called Spear Toss if you haven't already, it's fun. Basically you just click once to start the guy running forward, then click and hold as he raises the spear, then release when you want him to throw it. I think the idea is to release as close to the foul line without crossing it, and at a 45 degree angle. That's what I learned from 10th grade Physics in Mr. Wiemerschlage's class.
http://games.alentus.com/games/makai/games/speartoss.asp
Good luck, my high is like 534 something
This is already the 3rd post I have made about my mom, but she is too funny sometimes. Just now, she was telling me not to lose the credit card in her account, because it has a very high credit line. Her exact words (in Chinese) were "Make sure you don't lose the credit card, because it has a high limit, and if you do, someone might take it and go use it to go get gas for free."
Hahahahaha of all the things you could do with a stolen credit card, my mom is most afraid of people filling up their car with a tank of gas. The funny thing is that I think I remember her telling me the same thing a few years ago. Yes, you know that is the most lucrative scam for credit card thieves, they just go and drive their car around until they hit empty, and then fill up courtesy of Mrs. Chen. Soon enough those $20 spots will add up. I bet they wouldn't hesitate choose premium, either. Those bastards...
Although I must say, the last 2 times I filled up, the charge came up well over $30. As much fun as this car is to drive, it eats gas like a mofo. With me driving about 60 miles a day just to and from work, that's gonna add up.
Since this post is short, I'll post a link to take up some more of your time. Play this game called Spear Toss if you haven't already, it's fun. Basically you just click once to start the guy running forward, then click and hold as he raises the spear, then release when you want him to throw it. I think the idea is to release as close to the foul line without crossing it, and at a 45 degree angle. That's what I learned from 10th grade Physics in Mr. Wiemerschlage's class.
http://games.alentus.com/games/makai/games/speartoss.asp
Good luck, my high is like 534 something
Tuesday, October 22, 2002
Sniper Talk
I know this will make me seem like an insensitive punk, but all this sniper talk in the news reminds me of is Goldeneye for N64, that game was awesome. Ok, but I really do feel bad for the victims and their families. Whoever this sniper is (or copycat, or gang, who knows) needs to be caught, placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds. That's pretty standard, really.
I gotta say, though, is it just me or are the police and the press handling this thing in the most inept way possible? Every day, I see or hear something idiotic on the news. Last week, some lady from the investigation team or whatever was saying that witnesses of the shooting need to do a better job, that they should try to take down the license plates, get a good look at the shooter's features, and figure out which direction the shots were fired from, etc. Yeah right, if I am walking on the street or getting gas, and someone next to me gets popped, I am really gonna actually stop, turn towards the direction the shot came from, pull out a pen and notebook, write down the license plate, and keenly note the appearance of the shooter who is 100 yards away. Hellllllllllllllllls naw.... I am ducking to the facking ground, that's what I'm doing. Why don't they just ask me to pull out a camera, wait for the flash to warm up, and take a few pictures too?
Then today, the big news was reported that children in the area are "not safe anywhere at any time." What a news flash, but apparently, this was information that the press knew yesterday, but were asked not to release. Hmm.... After intense pondering, I really can't think of one good reason why this would be news to keep secret
But instead, last week when they borrowed the air patrol services from the military, they announced it as if they were Terrell Owens celebrating a touchdown. Nice, now the killer knows that if he is to strike again, better to do it during daylight instead of night, when shots can be seen from the sky. Way to go guys, what a great job of forcing the sniper to to shoot only in the daytime, when more people are outside anyways. Actually, they didn't even do that, because after the announcement people still got nailed at night.
If I were living around that area, I would be at least a little annoyed by how this whole thing is being handled. It's not like you can expect them to break the case right now, but at least they need to be more professional and responsible. And you know the more the press coverage this thing gets, the more satisfaction the killer(s) get. I don't really understand why people like to watch this kind of news so much. It doesn't help viewers avoid getting shot, it just makes everyone scared to go anywhere. There's almost no substantial information they are reporting, only wild stabbing at possible leads.
CNN and MSNBC must be making a killing these days, it's one thing after another. 9/11, then anthrax, West Nile, and now this. If there's one thing in common with all these stories, it's the fact that they all show that humans, and more specifically Americans, are not invincible. We'd like to think that in such an advanced society, we are safe and don't have to worry about anything. It's hardly a wonder that atheism is so popular, because nobody feels like they need God. I'm not gonna make this into a long religious thing, but let me just observe that we can do all the genetic research we want, we can build nuclear weapons, we can do plastic surgery, pour trillions of dollars into government and law enforcement and trust in Alan Greenspan, but humans are humans, and humans are not perfect. All you need to do is look at the suffering around the world, and watch the news in this country to see that plenty of bad things can happen to us no matter how much we try to cling to the illusion of safety.
I know this will make me seem like an insensitive punk, but all this sniper talk in the news reminds me of is Goldeneye for N64, that game was awesome. Ok, but I really do feel bad for the victims and their families. Whoever this sniper is (or copycat, or gang, who knows) needs to be caught, placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds. That's pretty standard, really.
I gotta say, though, is it just me or are the police and the press handling this thing in the most inept way possible? Every day, I see or hear something idiotic on the news. Last week, some lady from the investigation team or whatever was saying that witnesses of the shooting need to do a better job, that they should try to take down the license plates, get a good look at the shooter's features, and figure out which direction the shots were fired from, etc. Yeah right, if I am walking on the street or getting gas, and someone next to me gets popped, I am really gonna actually stop, turn towards the direction the shot came from, pull out a pen and notebook, write down the license plate, and keenly note the appearance of the shooter who is 100 yards away. Hellllllllllllllllls naw.... I am ducking to the facking ground, that's what I'm doing. Why don't they just ask me to pull out a camera, wait for the flash to warm up, and take a few pictures too?
Then today, the big news was reported that children in the area are "not safe anywhere at any time." What a news flash, but apparently, this was information that the press knew yesterday, but were asked not to release. Hmm.... After intense pondering, I really can't think of one good reason why this would be news to keep secret
But instead, last week when they borrowed the air patrol services from the military, they announced it as if they were Terrell Owens celebrating a touchdown. Nice, now the killer knows that if he is to strike again, better to do it during daylight instead of night, when shots can be seen from the sky. Way to go guys, what a great job of forcing the sniper to to shoot only in the daytime, when more people are outside anyways. Actually, they didn't even do that, because after the announcement people still got nailed at night.
If I were living around that area, I would be at least a little annoyed by how this whole thing is being handled. It's not like you can expect them to break the case right now, but at least they need to be more professional and responsible. And you know the more the press coverage this thing gets, the more satisfaction the killer(s) get. I don't really understand why people like to watch this kind of news so much. It doesn't help viewers avoid getting shot, it just makes everyone scared to go anywhere. There's almost no substantial information they are reporting, only wild stabbing at possible leads.
CNN and MSNBC must be making a killing these days, it's one thing after another. 9/11, then anthrax, West Nile, and now this. If there's one thing in common with all these stories, it's the fact that they all show that humans, and more specifically Americans, are not invincible. We'd like to think that in such an advanced society, we are safe and don't have to worry about anything. It's hardly a wonder that atheism is so popular, because nobody feels like they need God. I'm not gonna make this into a long religious thing, but let me just observe that we can do all the genetic research we want, we can build nuclear weapons, we can do plastic surgery, pour trillions of dollars into government and law enforcement and trust in Alan Greenspan, but humans are humans, and humans are not perfect. All you need to do is look at the suffering around the world, and watch the news in this country to see that plenty of bad things can happen to us no matter how much we try to cling to the illusion of safety.
Monday, October 21, 2002
My First 2 Weeks
Well, it doesn't feel like it, but I have officially finished a fortnight (nerd haha) at the job and I have some thoughts to put down. I've mostly just been following people around, observing what they do and stuff. Of course, since I'm not yet cleared for "Secret" status, there are some things they can't show me. Kind of sucks, they say getting cleared could take months or even over a year. Oh well.
Now that I'm in the so-called corporate world, there are some things that are supposed to happen. For example, I am supposed to start reading Dilbert comic strips and think it is the most hilarious thing ever. Hasn't happened yet though.
Or, I should watch Office Space again and appreciate it 10 times more than before. I haven't done that either, but I can see where maybe I would think some parts are funnier. It was a funny movie anyways. Oh, I do hear TPS being mentioned all the time, but I don't think it's a form that requires a memo explaining the need for a cover sheet. There's also a guy that looks like Milton too, except his glasses aren't huge and he isn't as messy.
One thing I vow never to do is to become a caffeine freak. I made it through college and I plan to make it through life without becoming dependent on coffee just to make it through my day. It's kind of the same reason I don't take Tylenol or Advil. That, plus it gives me headaches and even taking a sip of Coke at lunch will keep me up past 4 am. It's weird, I have a pretty big tolerance for beer but I am afraid to touch tea or Mountain Screw.
I don't know if it's just Northrop or Military convention, but there are acronyms for everything. Seriously, I can't understand like 80% of what the people are talking about at the meetings because it is like they are speaking a foreign language made of fancy letters. That, or they are just trying to be ghetto like Snoop Dogg raps: "with so much drama in the N-o-G, it's kinda hard bein Chen, J-O-single-E..."
Of course, I can't just go off spouting acronyms without knowing the convention, especially how to pronounce it. A DWG is called a "dwig" but you can't call a TPS "tips." Otherwise, you will be laughed out of town. Kind of like if you call the Korean boy band H.O.T. "hot."
For almost anything they do in this place, no matter how simple or mundane it is, they have come up with a professional-sounding term for it. Remember in the old Nintendo systems, when you turned it on and it didn't work, what did you do? That's right, take out the cartridge, shake it, blow on it, hammer it on your knee, then put it back in and it would work. Well, you can pretty much do the same thing when a memory module doesn't register on a card. You take it out of the socket and put it back in. They call it a "module re-seat." No, we don't blow on it, but if we did, they might use the term "oral aeration" or something. Or, say you want to change a light bulb. You would definitely switch off the power before unscrewing the old one and putting the new one in, because it's not good to do that with the power on, right? Well, same goes with putting in a $40,000 card with lots of circuitry, you make sure you shut down the power before sticking it in. Otherwise, you may have "hot-swapped," a dangerous and often costly mistake. Remember not to hot-swap the next time you have to change a light bulb.
I think I might know how it feels to be a rookie in the NFL at his first preseeason training camp. You come in having some preparation from college, but there's all this stuff to learn. You gotta pick up on the offensive or defensive system, remember the plays, and almost everyone around you is a lot bigger than what you are used to.
The cool thing about having a job (besides getting paid) is that once you work your hours and go home, you're done. You can watch sports all night or sit around doing nothing (done and done) without having to feel like "dang, I should be studying" or "dang, I should be looking for a job." Especially before I am married and have kids, all I really gotta worry about is going to sleep early and waking up on time.
That's about it at the 14-day mark... I'm sure more thoughts and observations will come in the future.
Well, it doesn't feel like it, but I have officially finished a fortnight (nerd haha) at the job and I have some thoughts to put down. I've mostly just been following people around, observing what they do and stuff. Of course, since I'm not yet cleared for "Secret" status, there are some things they can't show me. Kind of sucks, they say getting cleared could take months or even over a year. Oh well.
Now that I'm in the so-called corporate world, there are some things that are supposed to happen. For example, I am supposed to start reading Dilbert comic strips and think it is the most hilarious thing ever. Hasn't happened yet though.
Or, I should watch Office Space again and appreciate it 10 times more than before. I haven't done that either, but I can see where maybe I would think some parts are funnier. It was a funny movie anyways. Oh, I do hear TPS being mentioned all the time, but I don't think it's a form that requires a memo explaining the need for a cover sheet. There's also a guy that looks like Milton too, except his glasses aren't huge and he isn't as messy.
One thing I vow never to do is to become a caffeine freak. I made it through college and I plan to make it through life without becoming dependent on coffee just to make it through my day. It's kind of the same reason I don't take Tylenol or Advil. That, plus it gives me headaches and even taking a sip of Coke at lunch will keep me up past 4 am. It's weird, I have a pretty big tolerance for beer but I am afraid to touch tea or Mountain Screw.
I don't know if it's just Northrop or Military convention, but there are acronyms for everything. Seriously, I can't understand like 80% of what the people are talking about at the meetings because it is like they are speaking a foreign language made of fancy letters. That, or they are just trying to be ghetto like Snoop Dogg raps: "with so much drama in the N-o-G, it's kinda hard bein Chen, J-O-single-E..."
Of course, I can't just go off spouting acronyms without knowing the convention, especially how to pronounce it. A DWG is called a "dwig" but you can't call a TPS "tips." Otherwise, you will be laughed out of town. Kind of like if you call the Korean boy band H.O.T. "hot."
For almost anything they do in this place, no matter how simple or mundane it is, they have come up with a professional-sounding term for it. Remember in the old Nintendo systems, when you turned it on and it didn't work, what did you do? That's right, take out the cartridge, shake it, blow on it, hammer it on your knee, then put it back in and it would work. Well, you can pretty much do the same thing when a memory module doesn't register on a card. You take it out of the socket and put it back in. They call it a "module re-seat." No, we don't blow on it, but if we did, they might use the term "oral aeration" or something. Or, say you want to change a light bulb. You would definitely switch off the power before unscrewing the old one and putting the new one in, because it's not good to do that with the power on, right? Well, same goes with putting in a $40,000 card with lots of circuitry, you make sure you shut down the power before sticking it in. Otherwise, you may have "hot-swapped," a dangerous and often costly mistake. Remember not to hot-swap the next time you have to change a light bulb.
I think I might know how it feels to be a rookie in the NFL at his first preseeason training camp. You come in having some preparation from college, but there's all this stuff to learn. You gotta pick up on the offensive or defensive system, remember the plays, and almost everyone around you is a lot bigger than what you are used to.
The cool thing about having a job (besides getting paid) is that once you work your hours and go home, you're done. You can watch sports all night or sit around doing nothing (done and done) without having to feel like "dang, I should be studying" or "dang, I should be looking for a job." Especially before I am married and have kids, all I really gotta worry about is going to sleep early and waking up on time.
That's about it at the 14-day mark... I'm sure more thoughts and observations will come in the future.
Thursday, October 17, 2002
Your Name-o-scope Awaits
A lot of people in this world (myself not being one of them) read their horoscopes every day to see what their future holds. Other people believe that their Chinese Zodiac sign holds clues to their personality and their probable lifestyle. Still others read the lines on their palms or flip cards to be told what kind of person they are and what to watch for.
As for me, I have decided to invent a new system: telling things about someone based on their first name. It's not 100% foolproof of course, but I am willing to claim that you can tell a lot more than you think about someone by their first name alone.
What I'm not doing is telling you what your name means, because there are plenty of books out there that already have that kind of information. But my goal is to compile a list of common names that will provide a short profile or description of the person's likely characteristics, his/her tendencies, etc. Such would be helpful if anyone is being setup with a blind date. Otherwise, this list is for general reference.
If you are not on this list, it is probably because:
a) Your name is not very common and I don't know more than 3 or 4 people with that name, thus preventing me from having enough personal observations to draw from
b) I forgot about that name. If this is the case, let me know and I will try to patch the list.
DISCLAIMER: Do not take what I write too seriously or personally! If your name is included in this list, it doesn't necessarily mean that I am writing about you. For any name that is listed, I have drawn from a pool of at least 3-4 examples and tried to come up with a summary that fits most of them the best.
*****
Chris: There are actually 2 types of Chrises. One falls into the category that includes the Chris Rocks and Chris Tuckers of the world. These Chrises happen to be very active and loud, but make life for others more exciting. The other kind of Chris is a cookie-cutter white boy. Christopher Reeve, Chris Isaak, and Chris from Real World Chicago are excellent examples.
David/Dave: As a whole, guys named Dave are very passionate people. This may sometimes exhibit itself in the form of being extremely competitive, and often times leads to acts of impulsiveness as well. Daves are born as very talented individuals, and combined with their passionate attitude for pursuing what they want, they are almost always successful in what they do. However, they may sometimes strike certain people as being overly brash or arrogant. Famous examples include Dave Matthews, David Letterman, and King David of Israel.
Dennis: When meeting a Dennis for the first time, he has a knack for coming off as being aggressive or even offensive. Dennises typically have a cynical or sarcastic attitude, which happens to make them great at being comedians. If one can get beyond the first impression, they might find that a Dennis could be a quality friend and a fun person to be around. Famous Dennises include Dennis Rodman, Dennis Leary, and Dennis Miller.
Grace: Have you ever met a girl named Grace who was mean? I sure haven't. If I ever have a daughter, I figure that naming her Grace is a can't-miss strategy, because she is almost guaranteed to turn out to be a good girl. Other possible names include Faith and Trinity.
Greg: Maybe it's just me, but I don't know any Gregs who are fat. Gregs are usually very nice guys and cool friends. They don't usually draw the center of attention, nor do they desire to. One thing you could say about them is that they are typically very reliable and dependable people.
James/Jim/Jimmy: One word that pops into mind when you first hear any of these names is "immature." However, this tells only half the story, as what might be perceived as immaturity is actually more of a friendly attitude and a good sense of humor. These guys don't take many things seriously and are usually very fun to be around. Examples include Jimmy Fallon and Jim Carrey.
Jeff: While I wouldn't characterize Jeffs as being particularly quiet, they do tend to all have a laid back attitude and a subtle sense of humor. They are a relatively athletic bunch, and are generally very well-liked.
Jennifer/Jenny/Jen/Jenna: With it being one of the most common girls' names these days, it might be very hard to write a good, accurate description fitting all of them. But, I will say that most girls with this name happen to be blessed with good looks and the ability to attract almost any guy. While this may seem like a big plus, it could also turn out to be a curse too. Many Jennifers are very nice deep down, but become hardened by the world, and many times end up being the girl who people say "has issues." She will often times make puzzling or poor judgements which could hurt her reputation. Some famous Jennifers are Jennifer Lopez, Jenna from Survivor I, and Jennifer Love Hewitt.
Julie/Julia/Julianne: When it comes to girls, Julies are about as even-tempered as they come. The feeling you get from them is that they are fairly sensible, practical, and would make good mothers. Still, they usually make for interesting friends and are not boring people by any means. Think of Julie Andrews or Julia Child.
Katie: In almost any situation, you will find Katie with a smile on her face. She is always energetic and upbeat, great for cheering you up but might be a little annoying sometimes if you're feeling on edge already. The quintessential Katie I can think of is Katie Couric.
Kurt: If your name is Kurt, chances are, you are probably white. Not saying that's bad or anything, just observing that I myself have never met a Kurt who wasn't white, nor can I picture a non-white Kurt.
Lisa: On the surface, most people see Lisas as being small, cute, and harmless. But the fact is that most Lisas are actually a little feisty and have a some wild streak in them that you might not expect. Don't be fooled. Just keep people like Lisa "Left-eye" Lopez in mind, also Lisa Simpson and Lisa Turtle (from Saved By The Bell).
Michael/Mike: For the most part, Mikes have an addicting personality that make them popular among most people. While many are able to achieve great success early on in their life/career, a abnormally large number of them have the strange tendency to have their success cut short and partially overshadowed by their failures. Consider the examples of Michael Jordan, Michael Chang, Michael Jackson, or Mike Tyson.
Richard/Rich: Guys named Rich are the kind that take a while to get to know well. They aren't exactly considered shy, but are better described as complex, and often misunderstood. Be careful about judging these books by their covers, because who you meet could turn out to be a lot different from who he really is. In addition, Richards are commonly very intelligent people and seem to be more in touch with the artistic or abstract world. It seems like there are higher percentage of gay people named Rich too.
Sarah: When you encounter a Sarah in your life, expect her to be very blunt and straightforward. If she doesn't like you, she will leave no doubt in your mind of that fact. But if you are on her good side, be glad and try not to do anything to piss her off. I personally like the "Sarah" personality, because I appreciate when people aren't afraid to say what they are feeling or thinking.
Steve: "Well-rounded" is a description that fits most Steves quite well. Rarely do you find a Steve that is one-dimensional, for example, Steve Young was a quarterback who could throw well but also had the ability to run. Steven Spielberg has shown that he can direct all kinds of movies, from sci-fi and action to heavy dramas. Also, as those two examples show, Steves are born with good leadership skills.
Will(iam): These guys are often times the ones about which you say "he lives in his own world." Wills live their life not really caring about what anyone else thinks, and are known for being weird or quirky. Wherever they go, they are usually either loved or hated by those around them, either or. Say what you "will" (haha) about them though, the fact is that the world needs its share of Wills to provide relief from the mundane parts of life. Famous people named Will include Will Smith, William Shatner, William Shakespeare, William Faulkner.
*****
Like I said, do NOT take any of this personally. This is all supposed to be harmless observation so if you read something you didn't like, just consider all of the other stupid stuff I've written in the past, none of that was true, right?
A lot of people in this world (myself not being one of them) read their horoscopes every day to see what their future holds. Other people believe that their Chinese Zodiac sign holds clues to their personality and their probable lifestyle. Still others read the lines on their palms or flip cards to be told what kind of person they are and what to watch for.
As for me, I have decided to invent a new system: telling things about someone based on their first name. It's not 100% foolproof of course, but I am willing to claim that you can tell a lot more than you think about someone by their first name alone.
What I'm not doing is telling you what your name means, because there are plenty of books out there that already have that kind of information. But my goal is to compile a list of common names that will provide a short profile or description of the person's likely characteristics, his/her tendencies, etc. Such would be helpful if anyone is being setup with a blind date. Otherwise, this list is for general reference.
If you are not on this list, it is probably because:
a) Your name is not very common and I don't know more than 3 or 4 people with that name, thus preventing me from having enough personal observations to draw from
b) I forgot about that name. If this is the case, let me know and I will try to patch the list.
DISCLAIMER: Do not take what I write too seriously or personally! If your name is included in this list, it doesn't necessarily mean that I am writing about you. For any name that is listed, I have drawn from a pool of at least 3-4 examples and tried to come up with a summary that fits most of them the best.
*****
Chris: There are actually 2 types of Chrises. One falls into the category that includes the Chris Rocks and Chris Tuckers of the world. These Chrises happen to be very active and loud, but make life for others more exciting. The other kind of Chris is a cookie-cutter white boy. Christopher Reeve, Chris Isaak, and Chris from Real World Chicago are excellent examples.
David/Dave: As a whole, guys named Dave are very passionate people. This may sometimes exhibit itself in the form of being extremely competitive, and often times leads to acts of impulsiveness as well. Daves are born as very talented individuals, and combined with their passionate attitude for pursuing what they want, they are almost always successful in what they do. However, they may sometimes strike certain people as being overly brash or arrogant. Famous examples include Dave Matthews, David Letterman, and King David of Israel.
Dennis: When meeting a Dennis for the first time, he has a knack for coming off as being aggressive or even offensive. Dennises typically have a cynical or sarcastic attitude, which happens to make them great at being comedians. If one can get beyond the first impression, they might find that a Dennis could be a quality friend and a fun person to be around. Famous Dennises include Dennis Rodman, Dennis Leary, and Dennis Miller.
Grace: Have you ever met a girl named Grace who was mean? I sure haven't. If I ever have a daughter, I figure that naming her Grace is a can't-miss strategy, because she is almost guaranteed to turn out to be a good girl. Other possible names include Faith and Trinity.
Greg: Maybe it's just me, but I don't know any Gregs who are fat. Gregs are usually very nice guys and cool friends. They don't usually draw the center of attention, nor do they desire to. One thing you could say about them is that they are typically very reliable and dependable people.
James/Jim/Jimmy: One word that pops into mind when you first hear any of these names is "immature." However, this tells only half the story, as what might be perceived as immaturity is actually more of a friendly attitude and a good sense of humor. These guys don't take many things seriously and are usually very fun to be around. Examples include Jimmy Fallon and Jim Carrey.
Jeff: While I wouldn't characterize Jeffs as being particularly quiet, they do tend to all have a laid back attitude and a subtle sense of humor. They are a relatively athletic bunch, and are generally very well-liked.
Jennifer/Jenny/Jen/Jenna: With it being one of the most common girls' names these days, it might be very hard to write a good, accurate description fitting all of them. But, I will say that most girls with this name happen to be blessed with good looks and the ability to attract almost any guy. While this may seem like a big plus, it could also turn out to be a curse too. Many Jennifers are very nice deep down, but become hardened by the world, and many times end up being the girl who people say "has issues." She will often times make puzzling or poor judgements which could hurt her reputation. Some famous Jennifers are Jennifer Lopez, Jenna from Survivor I, and Jennifer Love Hewitt.
Julie/Julia/Julianne: When it comes to girls, Julies are about as even-tempered as they come. The feeling you get from them is that they are fairly sensible, practical, and would make good mothers. Still, they usually make for interesting friends and are not boring people by any means. Think of Julie Andrews or Julia Child.
Katie: In almost any situation, you will find Katie with a smile on her face. She is always energetic and upbeat, great for cheering you up but might be a little annoying sometimes if you're feeling on edge already. The quintessential Katie I can think of is Katie Couric.
Kurt: If your name is Kurt, chances are, you are probably white. Not saying that's bad or anything, just observing that I myself have never met a Kurt who wasn't white, nor can I picture a non-white Kurt.
Lisa: On the surface, most people see Lisas as being small, cute, and harmless. But the fact is that most Lisas are actually a little feisty and have a some wild streak in them that you might not expect. Don't be fooled. Just keep people like Lisa "Left-eye" Lopez in mind, also Lisa Simpson and Lisa Turtle (from Saved By The Bell).
Michael/Mike: For the most part, Mikes have an addicting personality that make them popular among most people. While many are able to achieve great success early on in their life/career, a abnormally large number of them have the strange tendency to have their success cut short and partially overshadowed by their failures. Consider the examples of Michael Jordan, Michael Chang, Michael Jackson, or Mike Tyson.
Richard/Rich: Guys named Rich are the kind that take a while to get to know well. They aren't exactly considered shy, but are better described as complex, and often misunderstood. Be careful about judging these books by their covers, because who you meet could turn out to be a lot different from who he really is. In addition, Richards are commonly very intelligent people and seem to be more in touch with the artistic or abstract world. It seems like there are higher percentage of gay people named Rich too.
Sarah: When you encounter a Sarah in your life, expect her to be very blunt and straightforward. If she doesn't like you, she will leave no doubt in your mind of that fact. But if you are on her good side, be glad and try not to do anything to piss her off. I personally like the "Sarah" personality, because I appreciate when people aren't afraid to say what they are feeling or thinking.
Steve: "Well-rounded" is a description that fits most Steves quite well. Rarely do you find a Steve that is one-dimensional, for example, Steve Young was a quarterback who could throw well but also had the ability to run. Steven Spielberg has shown that he can direct all kinds of movies, from sci-fi and action to heavy dramas. Also, as those two examples show, Steves are born with good leadership skills.
Will(iam): These guys are often times the ones about which you say "he lives in his own world." Wills live their life not really caring about what anyone else thinks, and are known for being weird or quirky. Wherever they go, they are usually either loved or hated by those around them, either or. Say what you "will" (haha) about them though, the fact is that the world needs its share of Wills to provide relief from the mundane parts of life. Famous people named Will include Will Smith, William Shatner, William Shakespeare, William Faulkner.
*****
Like I said, do NOT take any of this personally. This is all supposed to be harmless observation so if you read something you didn't like, just consider all of the other stupid stuff I've written in the past, none of that was true, right?
Tuesday, October 15, 2002
Overdone
I have a feeling this is gonna be one of my worst blog entries ever, but oh well, I am annoyed and something needs to be said. The thing is, I am really tired of all the variations on that stupid MasterCard commercial. They need a new idea, instead of relying on creativity that wore out long ago.
I'm sure you all know what I'm talking about, those MasterCard ads that go went something like this:
"Plane Ticket: $200
Camera: $150
Taking a picture with your great grandma who lives somewhere far from you hence the plane ticket: Priceless"
Ok, so that one I made up, and you are probably saying to yourself, "not like this guy should be talking about other people's lack of creativity." But I am kind of tired and I don't feel like putting more thought into something like this. Everyone knows what I am talking about anyways, just getting the point across.
Well, in the time since then, MasterCard has come out with about 5 billion more variations on that ad in any way possible. Some of them might pretend to be fresh, but in the end, it is still a rehash of the same thing.
I guess it was a pretty clever idea for a commercial at the time, maybe even the kind that makes you wonder "Who are the ad wizards that came up with that one?" (who knows where that quote is from?). Well, I'm telling you, these ad wizards need to think of a new idea.
But it would be one thing if it were just the MasterCard people using it. After all, they came up with the idea, and it's their problem if they want to be known as the people who came up with one good idea for a commercial and sucked it dry for a few years, while the ad wizards sat around doing jack.
Unfortunately, it seems to me like everybody is using that stupid idea now. Maybe it's just me, but I read some random people's blogs, I see people's email signatures, and any time somebody needs to sound like they wrote something funny, they use the "Priceless" thing. It's getting old, real old.
Maybe I am just being grumpy. I've seen a couple that I actually like. One went something like this:
"AEM Cold Air Intake: $80
Stillen Y-Pipe: $250
Greddy Catback Exhaust: $400
Mustangs eating your dust: Priceless
There are some things a V6 can't beat... for everything else, there's MAXIMA"
Ok, I probably only liked one that because I like Maximas, but hey, "Maxima" sounds like "MasterCard" so that adds another dimension to the cleverness, alright?
Enough with complaing about this though, nobody understands why I am mad about something this insignificant anyways. I'm just saying, whenever someone comes up with a good idea in this world, it almost always ends up being overdone. It gets annoying that 99% of people in this world rely heavily on other people's creativity, and that 99% of what we are surrounded by is recycled ideas rather than true originality.
One other thing that is bothering me is what's going on with the song "Sweet Home Alabama." Not that it's a terrible song, it's actually not bad, but why did they have to name a movie after the song? How lame is it when movie writers actually base the story on a song title, they gotta make sure that the main character is from Alabama and everything. And just off the top of my head, I can think of two other movies that have used that same song in a big scene, so it's definitely not a fresh idea (the movies I'm thinking of are Con Air and Forrest Gump, there are probably others).
For the sake of supporting my weak and faltering arguments so far, I guess I will list some other things that are copied these days and way overdone.
Boy bands/Female Pop Stars - Backstreet and N Sync were not bad, even 98 Degrees was cool for a while, but O-Town, LFO, Westlife, and Soul Decision I could have done without. And Britney was the first and only queen ever of teenie pop, forget Christina, Jessica, or Mandy.
Reality TV shows - Real World has been around for a while, but after Survivor, there are too many to list that have followed since then. Same goes for primetime game shows after Who Wants to Be A Millionaire? One minute it's the only show of its kind, next thing you know, 800 more pop up that are almost exactly like it, only on different channels.
Japanese baseball players - Nomo was good, but then Hideki Irabu scared all the GMs away from Japan for a while. Then Ichiro came, and the flood began again. Seriously, how did a piece of crap like Tsuyoshi Shinjo end up here?
Awards ceremonies - I already wrote about this before.
Creative Terrorism - Someone decides to think of a wacky idea to kill innocent people senselessly, and then every extremist Islamic schmoe thinks he can do one better. They used to just hijack planes and kidnap hostages. Now people are flying the planes into buildings and burying bombs in their shoes as if they were Osama himself. Come on guys, don't you think American society has had it by now with the show? We are too saturated to be able to handle any more of this off the wall stuff so it's time to move onto something else.
(aside) Why attack Bali? Is it because you stupid fairies can't break through the tightened security in the US, so you go for a tourist location halfway across the world instead?
Extra-huge SUVs - I can remember when only a limited number of people drove Jeeps, Ford Explorers, or Chevy Blazers. They were usually for construction workers or park rangers, people who actually needed to haul stuff or drive through mud. Then, everyone started buying them. Then, they started to make them bigger. I see more and more Ford Expeditions and Excursions, Cadillac Escalades, Toyota Sequoias, etc. on the road now. Too much, I say.
Dance step video games - I never liked those to begin with... now they are all over the place.
Tattoos of Chinese Characters - It was kind of a novel idea at first, but when I start seeing every skanky white girl, every inbred trailer trash wife-beater wearing hick, or every dumb rookie NBA player start putting up words on their body that don't even make any sense, I gotta say enough is enough. What a disgrace to the beauty of the Chinese written language.
Notice one thing about a lot of these examples: the first and original is usually the best. Often imitated, rarely duplicated.
I don't know why I am so peevish lately. The next blog, whenever I write it, will be positive, I promise.
I have a feeling this is gonna be one of my worst blog entries ever, but oh well, I am annoyed and something needs to be said. The thing is, I am really tired of all the variations on that stupid MasterCard commercial. They need a new idea, instead of relying on creativity that wore out long ago.
I'm sure you all know what I'm talking about, those MasterCard ads that go went something like this:
"Plane Ticket: $200
Camera: $150
Taking a picture with your great grandma who lives somewhere far from you hence the plane ticket: Priceless"
Ok, so that one I made up, and you are probably saying to yourself, "not like this guy should be talking about other people's lack of creativity." But I am kind of tired and I don't feel like putting more thought into something like this. Everyone knows what I am talking about anyways, just getting the point across.
Well, in the time since then, MasterCard has come out with about 5 billion more variations on that ad in any way possible. Some of them might pretend to be fresh, but in the end, it is still a rehash of the same thing.
I guess it was a pretty clever idea for a commercial at the time, maybe even the kind that makes you wonder "Who are the ad wizards that came up with that one?" (who knows where that quote is from?). Well, I'm telling you, these ad wizards need to think of a new idea.
But it would be one thing if it were just the MasterCard people using it. After all, they came up with the idea, and it's their problem if they want to be known as the people who came up with one good idea for a commercial and sucked it dry for a few years, while the ad wizards sat around doing jack.
Unfortunately, it seems to me like everybody is using that stupid idea now. Maybe it's just me, but I read some random people's blogs, I see people's email signatures, and any time somebody needs to sound like they wrote something funny, they use the "Priceless" thing. It's getting old, real old.
Maybe I am just being grumpy. I've seen a couple that I actually like. One went something like this:
"AEM Cold Air Intake: $80
Stillen Y-Pipe: $250
Greddy Catback Exhaust: $400
Mustangs eating your dust: Priceless
There are some things a V6 can't beat... for everything else, there's MAXIMA"
Ok, I probably only liked one that because I like Maximas, but hey, "Maxima" sounds like "MasterCard" so that adds another dimension to the cleverness, alright?
Enough with complaing about this though, nobody understands why I am mad about something this insignificant anyways. I'm just saying, whenever someone comes up with a good idea in this world, it almost always ends up being overdone. It gets annoying that 99% of people in this world rely heavily on other people's creativity, and that 99% of what we are surrounded by is recycled ideas rather than true originality.
One other thing that is bothering me is what's going on with the song "Sweet Home Alabama." Not that it's a terrible song, it's actually not bad, but why did they have to name a movie after the song? How lame is it when movie writers actually base the story on a song title, they gotta make sure that the main character is from Alabama and everything. And just off the top of my head, I can think of two other movies that have used that same song in a big scene, so it's definitely not a fresh idea (the movies I'm thinking of are Con Air and Forrest Gump, there are probably others).
For the sake of supporting my weak and faltering arguments so far, I guess I will list some other things that are copied these days and way overdone.
Boy bands/Female Pop Stars - Backstreet and N Sync were not bad, even 98 Degrees was cool for a while, but O-Town, LFO, Westlife, and Soul Decision I could have done without. And Britney was the first and only queen ever of teenie pop, forget Christina, Jessica, or Mandy.
Reality TV shows - Real World has been around for a while, but after Survivor, there are too many to list that have followed since then. Same goes for primetime game shows after Who Wants to Be A Millionaire? One minute it's the only show of its kind, next thing you know, 800 more pop up that are almost exactly like it, only on different channels.
Japanese baseball players - Nomo was good, but then Hideki Irabu scared all the GMs away from Japan for a while. Then Ichiro came, and the flood began again. Seriously, how did a piece of crap like Tsuyoshi Shinjo end up here?
Awards ceremonies - I already wrote about this before.
Creative Terrorism - Someone decides to think of a wacky idea to kill innocent people senselessly, and then every extremist Islamic schmoe thinks he can do one better. They used to just hijack planes and kidnap hostages. Now people are flying the planes into buildings and burying bombs in their shoes as if they were Osama himself. Come on guys, don't you think American society has had it by now with the show? We are too saturated to be able to handle any more of this off the wall stuff so it's time to move onto something else.
(aside) Why attack Bali? Is it because you stupid fairies can't break through the tightened security in the US, so you go for a tourist location halfway across the world instead?
Extra-huge SUVs - I can remember when only a limited number of people drove Jeeps, Ford Explorers, or Chevy Blazers. They were usually for construction workers or park rangers, people who actually needed to haul stuff or drive through mud. Then, everyone started buying them. Then, they started to make them bigger. I see more and more Ford Expeditions and Excursions, Cadillac Escalades, Toyota Sequoias, etc. on the road now. Too much, I say.
Dance step video games - I never liked those to begin with... now they are all over the place.
Tattoos of Chinese Characters - It was kind of a novel idea at first, but when I start seeing every skanky white girl, every inbred trailer trash wife-beater wearing hick, or every dumb rookie NBA player start putting up words on their body that don't even make any sense, I gotta say enough is enough. What a disgrace to the beauty of the Chinese written language.
Notice one thing about a lot of these examples: the first and original is usually the best. Often imitated, rarely duplicated.
I don't know why I am so peevish lately. The next blog, whenever I write it, will be positive, I promise.
Saturday, October 12, 2002
Saturday Morning
I woke up this morning to the sound of a fire truck's siren. Now, I live about 2 minutes away from the fire station, so I am kind of used to hearing these sirens in the distance every once in a while. But this morning, it sounded like the siren was especially loud. And this time, it was followed by the sound of a truck going by. Since I was dead tired and I wanted to sleep, I just ignored it and tried to go back to sleep.
But, about 10 minutes later, the same thing happened. Being the stubborn sleeper I am, I refused to get up until about an hour (and 4 or 5 more siren passings) later.
It turns out that the fire station was giving tours aboard its fire engine at about 10 am on a Saturday morning. Now, firefighters are great and everything, but what is up with that? Don't they have any lives to save or anything? At least go rescue some cats or something.
I guess 10 o'clock isn't really that early, but still I was pretty pissed that I got woken up earlier than I wanted to on the one day of the week I get to sleep late. Seriously, what kind of people wake up on a Saturday morning and say to themselves, "gee, it seems like a nice day, I think I'll go to the fire station and catch a tour on the shiny red fire truck." Not anybody I know. These people, whoever they are, need to go buy themselves a Nintendo and play it.
Also, isn't there a better place to tour than a small residential street, which happens to be where I live? That doesn't seem like a very interesting tour. "Hey look, a 2-car garage! Look, another one!" or "dang, that lawn is hella green, man!" "Speed Limit is 25, let's cruise baby!" Not that the town of Darien is all that interesting, but at least we have a WalMart and a few streets that are busier. Of all the places, why do these fools choose to drive in front of my house and ring their stupid siren on a Saturday morning?
Yes, I am feeling just a tad bit "belligerent" today...
I woke up this morning to the sound of a fire truck's siren. Now, I live about 2 minutes away from the fire station, so I am kind of used to hearing these sirens in the distance every once in a while. But this morning, it sounded like the siren was especially loud. And this time, it was followed by the sound of a truck going by. Since I was dead tired and I wanted to sleep, I just ignored it and tried to go back to sleep.
But, about 10 minutes later, the same thing happened. Being the stubborn sleeper I am, I refused to get up until about an hour (and 4 or 5 more siren passings) later.
It turns out that the fire station was giving tours aboard its fire engine at about 10 am on a Saturday morning. Now, firefighters are great and everything, but what is up with that? Don't they have any lives to save or anything? At least go rescue some cats or something.
I guess 10 o'clock isn't really that early, but still I was pretty pissed that I got woken up earlier than I wanted to on the one day of the week I get to sleep late. Seriously, what kind of people wake up on a Saturday morning and say to themselves, "gee, it seems like a nice day, I think I'll go to the fire station and catch a tour on the shiny red fire truck." Not anybody I know. These people, whoever they are, need to go buy themselves a Nintendo and play it.
Also, isn't there a better place to tour than a small residential street, which happens to be where I live? That doesn't seem like a very interesting tour. "Hey look, a 2-car garage! Look, another one!" or "dang, that lawn is hella green, man!" "Speed Limit is 25, let's cruise baby!" Not that the town of Darien is all that interesting, but at least we have a WalMart and a few streets that are busier. Of all the places, why do these fools choose to drive in front of my house and ring their stupid siren on a Saturday morning?
Yes, I am feeling just a tad bit "belligerent" today...
Tuesday, October 08, 2002
My First 2 Days of Work
Yesterday (Monday) was my first day at the new job. So far, it's gone pretty smooth. I will probably have to get used to the traffic times so I don't keep showing up 10-20 minutes early, but oh well. I think the drive is gonna be around 45-50 minutes each way, which isn't as bad as I originally thought.
All I've been doing the past couple days is "getting used to the computer and environment" and filling out forms. The most important form is the application for my security clearance. I have to complete this long thing that lists all I've been doing the past 7 years and asks for references to verify the details. I already asked a bunch of people if I could list them, but I think I might need a couple more, so if you don't want to diss me, just block my IM name (Dudo509) and don't pick up when my name shows up on your caller ID. It's not a big deal though, I think some lady is just gonna contact you and ask if I lived in Darien from 1995-2002 and went to U of I the past 4 years or something like that.
The point of all this is so I can eventually be cleared by the US Department of Defense (DoD, as the cool ones call it) to deal with "Secret" matters. I didn't know this before, but "Secret" is exactly one level under "Top Secret," and one higher than "Confidential." When I used to watch movies or TV shows and hear the words "this is strictly confidential," I used to think it was so cool. But maybe soon I will find myself scoffing at such a low rating. Someone will give me an envelope stamped "Confidential" and I'll be like "psshhhhh.... give this unimportant shiznit to one of the peons."
Other than this, there isn't much I can say about the first couple days. Everyone that I've met at this place seems really nice, my supervisor included. He's been working there for 35 years and I can tell he's liked all 35. Most of the people in my department are older, at least in their 30's I think, but there are a few that are maybe only a year or two older than me. In other departments, I met a lot more people who are in their early 20's, and I am guessing eventually I will get to work with most all of them at some point or another.
Oh yeah, if anyone is gonna be near the area and wants to have lunch with me, give me a call or email. I can pretty much go whenever I want, so definitely let me know. It's basically like 5 minutes north of Woodfield, and there are plenty of restaurants around the area that I want to explore one by one. Today I checked out this place called "Taco Bell." It was pretty cool, but I don't know if I can handle such authentic Mexican food every day, I might need some variety.
An Unrelated Story
On my car stereo, there is this button labeled "PTY." I remember the guy at the dealer telling me what it was, but I forgot exactly what he said. Anyways, I think I might just be a little sleep deprived, but you know how in computer programs (like Microsoft Word), you can move the mouse over a button, and if you leave it for a second or two without clicking, a little yellow box will pop-up with a short explanation about what that button does? For example, move it over the symbol of a floppy disk in Word's Toolbar, and it will say "Save." Well, today on my way back from work I briefly moved my finger over the "PTY" button in my car but didn't press it, half expecting a yellow box to pop up and tell me what that button was for. Oh, I came to my senses soon enough, but I still think I deserve to be slapped or beaten up for doing that. I was being too nerdy for such an action to go unpunished.
Wouldn't it be cool if that's how the world worked though? Life imitates art, or computer design in this case. Like in NFL football, they have been using Madden 2002 to simulate what the result would be, and they have that yellow line that shows where the first down is. And after playing Mario Kart for years, my dream has always been to drive a car that has 3 rotating balls (or balloons) around it, and to be able to fire red homing shells at other cars or use a star to bully my way through traffic. When I have a conversation on the phone, I want to hear that Instant Messenger noise (imrcv.wav) every time the other person finishes his/her sentence. "Hey Joe, how's it going? [de-ringgg]" "I'm doin alright, how bout you? [dada-dung]"
Oh yeah, PTY is used to help you program new stations. Supposedly in the future, all radio stations will broadcast information about their content, kind of like Digital Cable TV if you have it. So, say I drive to California, and along the way I want to listen to only the local "Adult Contemporary" stations. In that case, the PTY button will be my best friend. It will allow me to enjoy hours and hours of Celine Dion no matter what area I go through.
Unrelated Story #2
This isn't really a story, but I just ran out of contact lens solution. Normally, I procrastinate as long as I can to go out and get stuff like this, until I am out of everything else. Then, I go to Wal-Mart like twice a year and buy all of the contact solution, shampoo, toothpaste, mouthwash, deodorant, etc. that I can all at once.
Not this time though. This time, I reminded myself to "pick it up after work." For some nerdy reason, that just seems cool to me. I've always wanted to say "I'll just pick it up after work," and now I can. Someday, my wife will ask me if I can get some eggs, and I'll be so ready to say "sure, I'll pick some up after work!" I can't wait... It's probably gonna one of the best parts about having a job, right up there with the "learning experience," "benefits," and "money."
Related Story
Did you know that Alcon now makes Opti-Free Express No-Rub Multi-Purpose Solution with Long Lasting Comfort? The "Long Lasting Comfort" thing is the newest feature that I just noticed today. There once was a time when it was just Opti-Free Multi-Purpose Solution. Not only did you have to rub your contacts, but you had to soak them overnight, not the Express-style 15 minutes. Then, every week you had to use a special "enzymatic cleaner" where you drop a little tablet into these little clear plastic vials and they would bubble up and clean your contacts where the daily solution couldn't. Worst of all, the "comfort" that this treatment provided was not "lasting."
Before that, I used an even more inconvenient system where I had to buy 3 bottles just for everyday use. One was a little bottle of "Starting Solution," a highly concentrated cleaner that you had to use to rub your contacts with, before soaking it overnight in "Finishing Solution." Before putting your contacts in, you then had to rinse with saline solution. Of course, you still had to do the weekly enzyme cleaning too.
Kids these days don't know how good they've got it. One bottle's got your ticket to long-lasting comfort, you don't even gotta rub.
After all this, I didn't even end up buying that stuff. It's freaking 8 bucks a bottle... For that kind of money, I ended up getting 2 of the Ciba-Vision Solo Care Plus. It takes 6 hours and doesn't specifically offer "Lasting Comfort", but I still don't have to rub, and it came with a free lens case. I guess I'll deal with it.
Yesterday (Monday) was my first day at the new job. So far, it's gone pretty smooth. I will probably have to get used to the traffic times so I don't keep showing up 10-20 minutes early, but oh well. I think the drive is gonna be around 45-50 minutes each way, which isn't as bad as I originally thought.
All I've been doing the past couple days is "getting used to the computer and environment" and filling out forms. The most important form is the application for my security clearance. I have to complete this long thing that lists all I've been doing the past 7 years and asks for references to verify the details. I already asked a bunch of people if I could list them, but I think I might need a couple more, so if you don't want to diss me, just block my IM name (Dudo509) and don't pick up when my name shows up on your caller ID. It's not a big deal though, I think some lady is just gonna contact you and ask if I lived in Darien from 1995-2002 and went to U of I the past 4 years or something like that.
The point of all this is so I can eventually be cleared by the US Department of Defense (DoD, as the cool ones call it) to deal with "Secret" matters. I didn't know this before, but "Secret" is exactly one level under "Top Secret," and one higher than "Confidential." When I used to watch movies or TV shows and hear the words "this is strictly confidential," I used to think it was so cool. But maybe soon I will find myself scoffing at such a low rating. Someone will give me an envelope stamped "Confidential" and I'll be like "psshhhhh.... give this unimportant shiznit to one of the peons."
Other than this, there isn't much I can say about the first couple days. Everyone that I've met at this place seems really nice, my supervisor included. He's been working there for 35 years and I can tell he's liked all 35. Most of the people in my department are older, at least in their 30's I think, but there are a few that are maybe only a year or two older than me. In other departments, I met a lot more people who are in their early 20's, and I am guessing eventually I will get to work with most all of them at some point or another.
Oh yeah, if anyone is gonna be near the area and wants to have lunch with me, give me a call or email. I can pretty much go whenever I want, so definitely let me know. It's basically like 5 minutes north of Woodfield, and there are plenty of restaurants around the area that I want to explore one by one. Today I checked out this place called "Taco Bell." It was pretty cool, but I don't know if I can handle such authentic Mexican food every day, I might need some variety.
An Unrelated Story
On my car stereo, there is this button labeled "PTY." I remember the guy at the dealer telling me what it was, but I forgot exactly what he said. Anyways, I think I might just be a little sleep deprived, but you know how in computer programs (like Microsoft Word), you can move the mouse over a button, and if you leave it for a second or two without clicking, a little yellow box will pop-up with a short explanation about what that button does? For example, move it over the symbol of a floppy disk in Word's Toolbar, and it will say "Save." Well, today on my way back from work I briefly moved my finger over the "PTY" button in my car but didn't press it, half expecting a yellow box to pop up and tell me what that button was for. Oh, I came to my senses soon enough, but I still think I deserve to be slapped or beaten up for doing that. I was being too nerdy for such an action to go unpunished.
Wouldn't it be cool if that's how the world worked though? Life imitates art, or computer design in this case. Like in NFL football, they have been using Madden 2002 to simulate what the result would be, and they have that yellow line that shows where the first down is. And after playing Mario Kart for years, my dream has always been to drive a car that has 3 rotating balls (or balloons) around it, and to be able to fire red homing shells at other cars or use a star to bully my way through traffic. When I have a conversation on the phone, I want to hear that Instant Messenger noise (imrcv.wav) every time the other person finishes his/her sentence. "Hey Joe, how's it going? [de-ringgg]" "I'm doin alright, how bout you? [dada-dung]"
Oh yeah, PTY is used to help you program new stations. Supposedly in the future, all radio stations will broadcast information about their content, kind of like Digital Cable TV if you have it. So, say I drive to California, and along the way I want to listen to only the local "Adult Contemporary" stations. In that case, the PTY button will be my best friend. It will allow me to enjoy hours and hours of Celine Dion no matter what area I go through.
Unrelated Story #2
This isn't really a story, but I just ran out of contact lens solution. Normally, I procrastinate as long as I can to go out and get stuff like this, until I am out of everything else. Then, I go to Wal-Mart like twice a year and buy all of the contact solution, shampoo, toothpaste, mouthwash, deodorant, etc. that I can all at once.
Not this time though. This time, I reminded myself to "pick it up after work." For some nerdy reason, that just seems cool to me. I've always wanted to say "I'll just pick it up after work," and now I can. Someday, my wife will ask me if I can get some eggs, and I'll be so ready to say "sure, I'll pick some up after work!" I can't wait... It's probably gonna one of the best parts about having a job, right up there with the "learning experience," "benefits," and "money."
Related Story
Did you know that Alcon now makes Opti-Free Express No-Rub Multi-Purpose Solution with Long Lasting Comfort? The "Long Lasting Comfort" thing is the newest feature that I just noticed today. There once was a time when it was just Opti-Free Multi-Purpose Solution. Not only did you have to rub your contacts, but you had to soak them overnight, not the Express-style 15 minutes. Then, every week you had to use a special "enzymatic cleaner" where you drop a little tablet into these little clear plastic vials and they would bubble up and clean your contacts where the daily solution couldn't. Worst of all, the "comfort" that this treatment provided was not "lasting."
Before that, I used an even more inconvenient system where I had to buy 3 bottles just for everyday use. One was a little bottle of "Starting Solution," a highly concentrated cleaner that you had to use to rub your contacts with, before soaking it overnight in "Finishing Solution." Before putting your contacts in, you then had to rinse with saline solution. Of course, you still had to do the weekly enzyme cleaning too.
Kids these days don't know how good they've got it. One bottle's got your ticket to long-lasting comfort, you don't even gotta rub.
After all this, I didn't even end up buying that stuff. It's freaking 8 bucks a bottle... For that kind of money, I ended up getting 2 of the Ciba-Vision Solo Care Plus. It takes 6 hours and doesn't specifically offer "Lasting Comfort", but I still don't have to rub, and it came with a free lens case. I guess I'll deal with it.
Sunday, October 06, 2002
Scattered Thoughts
It's time for some more randomness from the minds that bring you dudo509 blogs.
I have always wondered about people who design bathrooms for public buildings. Anytime these places are busy, you always see a line for the women's side, but not for the men. By now, it should be common knowledge that women are born with the knack of taking longer to use the bathroom. It's partly biological, and partly because they like to take their merry time powdering their nose and gossiping about men in the bathroom. Guys go in, do their thing, wash their hands (at least the clean ones do), then they're out. We want no unneccessary time spent in a place that is usually pretty nasty to begin with. I haven't been in many girls' bathrooms in my life, but I bet they are a whole lot nicer than men's rooms. Instead of sticky floors and a thick air of stank, there are probably flowers and potpurri. Call me stereotypical if you will, but just look at the facts and you can see that I am right. Anyways, you would think that people would start to design buildings with a bigger women's restroom than men's, but not everyone is as wise as me, I guess.
AOL Instant Messanger is one of the greatest things ever invented. Your buddy list is like a party where everyone kind of hangs out. Some are good friends, others you just kind of know. You can talk to whoever you feel like; there's no pressure to talk to someone just because they are online at the "party". When you are away, it's like an answering machine that takes your messages and organizes them. Almost everybody I know has an AIM screen name, and in the day where ethernet or cable connections are common, it's pretty easy to reach most people online. And it's nice that you can leave it on in the background while you do other stuff. Then there is the Buddy Chat feature, one of the most underused and underrated functions. I recently got to talk to all 3 of my college roommates at once using Buddy Chat. One is in California studying for a masters at Berkeley, another in Arlington Heights as a teacher, and the other in Champaign for an MBA. But for a few minutes, it was almost like we were back at the apartment chillin together. No, it wasn't the same, but not too shabby for a little program that anybody can download for free. Not too shabby at all.
Who would've thought that last year's World Series teams would both be eliminated in the first round? Certainly not I. Hopefully nobody used my predictions for gambling purposes. The Yankees got handled, it could've been a sweep if it weren't for a couple bad pitches in Game 1 by the Angels bullpen. All that money spent, for nothing. Haha I can't say I feel bad for Jason Giambi. Now I wouldn't mind any team winning, except maybe the Cardinals.
I just scanned my computer for viruses (virii?), and it's weird, but I was actually kind of disappointed that no viruses were found. That's no fun at all, I need some excitement in my life.
Buying a car would be fun, if it weren't for the salesmen. Car salesmen rarely know a lot about the cars they are selling, but they think they are so smooth. They try to steer you to get all these features you don't need. Then you ask them a question, and they never give you a straight answer. You ask them what the typical financing rate is right now, a simple question, and they want you to fill out a credit history form first. Either that, or they gotta talk to their manager first. What is the deal with that? I swear, they gotta talk to the manager for everything. What's your name? "Uh... lemme talk to my manager about that first and I'll get back to you." Seriously though, why are there no helpful and sincere salesmen in the car dealer industry? I go to Target looking for something, and a high school kid working there will always tell me exactly what I need to know, no extra horse-ca-ca involved. Imagine if I went to Bakers Square for a pie, and I had to spend an hour bargaining with them just so they would sell it to me at a fair price, somewhere below the sticker price for the pie and closer to the invoice. Ridiculous.
Sweetest Day is coming up. Yes, that's right, the most bogus holiday of them all. Except for maybe Valentine's Day. hahahaha
Burning your tongue is one of the worst feelings, not because of the initial pain, but because you know that tomorrow it is gonna be all nasty. Speaking of which, I have to say that people who pierce their tongues are crazy. When I accidentally bite my tongue, it ends up being an open sore that hurts like crazy for days. I can't even imagine how worse it would feel to put a spear completely through your tongue.
I will have to cut this short so that I can get ready for bed and my first day of work tomorrow. Thanks for reading...
It's time for some more randomness from the minds that bring you dudo509 blogs.
I have always wondered about people who design bathrooms for public buildings. Anytime these places are busy, you always see a line for the women's side, but not for the men. By now, it should be common knowledge that women are born with the knack of taking longer to use the bathroom. It's partly biological, and partly because they like to take their merry time powdering their nose and gossiping about men in the bathroom. Guys go in, do their thing, wash their hands (at least the clean ones do), then they're out. We want no unneccessary time spent in a place that is usually pretty nasty to begin with. I haven't been in many girls' bathrooms in my life, but I bet they are a whole lot nicer than men's rooms. Instead of sticky floors and a thick air of stank, there are probably flowers and potpurri. Call me stereotypical if you will, but just look at the facts and you can see that I am right. Anyways, you would think that people would start to design buildings with a bigger women's restroom than men's, but not everyone is as wise as me, I guess.
AOL Instant Messanger is one of the greatest things ever invented. Your buddy list is like a party where everyone kind of hangs out. Some are good friends, others you just kind of know. You can talk to whoever you feel like; there's no pressure to talk to someone just because they are online at the "party". When you are away, it's like an answering machine that takes your messages and organizes them. Almost everybody I know has an AIM screen name, and in the day where ethernet or cable connections are common, it's pretty easy to reach most people online. And it's nice that you can leave it on in the background while you do other stuff. Then there is the Buddy Chat feature, one of the most underused and underrated functions. I recently got to talk to all 3 of my college roommates at once using Buddy Chat. One is in California studying for a masters at Berkeley, another in Arlington Heights as a teacher, and the other in Champaign for an MBA. But for a few minutes, it was almost like we were back at the apartment chillin together. No, it wasn't the same, but not too shabby for a little program that anybody can download for free. Not too shabby at all.
Who would've thought that last year's World Series teams would both be eliminated in the first round? Certainly not I. Hopefully nobody used my predictions for gambling purposes. The Yankees got handled, it could've been a sweep if it weren't for a couple bad pitches in Game 1 by the Angels bullpen. All that money spent, for nothing. Haha I can't say I feel bad for Jason Giambi. Now I wouldn't mind any team winning, except maybe the Cardinals.
I just scanned my computer for viruses (virii?), and it's weird, but I was actually kind of disappointed that no viruses were found. That's no fun at all, I need some excitement in my life.
Buying a car would be fun, if it weren't for the salesmen. Car salesmen rarely know a lot about the cars they are selling, but they think they are so smooth. They try to steer you to get all these features you don't need. Then you ask them a question, and they never give you a straight answer. You ask them what the typical financing rate is right now, a simple question, and they want you to fill out a credit history form first. Either that, or they gotta talk to their manager first. What is the deal with that? I swear, they gotta talk to the manager for everything. What's your name? "Uh... lemme talk to my manager about that first and I'll get back to you." Seriously though, why are there no helpful and sincere salesmen in the car dealer industry? I go to Target looking for something, and a high school kid working there will always tell me exactly what I need to know, no extra horse-ca-ca involved. Imagine if I went to Bakers Square for a pie, and I had to spend an hour bargaining with them just so they would sell it to me at a fair price, somewhere below the sticker price for the pie and closer to the invoice. Ridiculous.
Sweetest Day is coming up. Yes, that's right, the most bogus holiday of them all. Except for maybe Valentine's Day. hahahaha
Burning your tongue is one of the worst feelings, not because of the initial pain, but because you know that tomorrow it is gonna be all nasty. Speaking of which, I have to say that people who pierce their tongues are crazy. When I accidentally bite my tongue, it ends up being an open sore that hurts like crazy for days. I can't even imagine how worse it would feel to put a spear completely through your tongue.
I will have to cut this short so that I can get ready for bed and my first day of work tomorrow. Thanks for reading...
Friday, October 04, 2002
New Car
As I have mentioned in a previous blog, this past week I got a new ride, a 2003 Infiniti G35 sedan. After considering a wide range of possibilities, I finally settled on getting the G35. It had to be a quick decision, with my job set to start in a few days, and it took basically one afternoon to get the deal done.
So far, I am babying this car as much as I can before it is forcibly broken in on Monday, when I start the daily commute. I gotta say, it's really really hard to resist the temptation to just let go and set those 260 ponies loose, but I gotta be strong. Patience is a virtue... I just wish I was more virtuous.
People might be wondering, what about the Maxima? That thing was almost a part of my identity for the past few years. Well, as much as I would have loved to keep it for a lot longer, everything was pointing towards me giving it up to my sister. Of course I wasn't happy about it at the time, and I still miss my old baby, but at least it stays in the family and I will get to see her on breaks and some weekends. When my sis comes home, me and my ex will have to spend some time together catching up on old times. I'll hand over the keys to the G for a couple days, no prob.
I am really loving the new car so far, with all the snazzy features like radio/CD controls on the steering wheel and a rearview mirror that dims when the sun is too bright. But I gotta say, nothing will ever replace the Max. I'll always treasure the times we had together. I'll forever love the familiarity of sitting in that drivers seat and being in touch with everything around me. *sniff* I'd like to dedicate a few lines...
"How do I
say goodbye
to what we had?
The good times
that made us laugh
outweigh the bad.
I thought we'd get
to see forever
but forever's gone away.
It's so hard
to say goodbye
to yesterday.
And I'll take
with me the memories
To be my sunshine
after the rain
It's so hard
to say goodbye
to yesterday..."
hahaha before my blog gets any gayer, I should stop. Also, Olivia will start getting jealous if she ever reads this.
Someone has suggested that I take people for rides and charge them admission. Well, it's a nice car, but it's not that nice. It's not "Ford Tempo nice" by any stretch of the imagination, that's for sure. But if anyone still wants a ride, you can just ask and I will say yes (assuming that I like you).
By the way, I am guessing that with the changes coming up in my life, my blog will be at least somewhat affected. Don't know for sure, but I think the really really long entries are gonna be a thing of the past. I'm not sure I will update as often either, but we'll see. Believe me, I like writing blogs, but realistically, it's not gonna be as easy or accessible when I'm not working at home, when I would have loads of free time in between patches of business. Oh well, whatever happens happens.
As I have mentioned in a previous blog, this past week I got a new ride, a 2003 Infiniti G35 sedan. After considering a wide range of possibilities, I finally settled on getting the G35. It had to be a quick decision, with my job set to start in a few days, and it took basically one afternoon to get the deal done.
So far, I am babying this car as much as I can before it is forcibly broken in on Monday, when I start the daily commute. I gotta say, it's really really hard to resist the temptation to just let go and set those 260 ponies loose, but I gotta be strong. Patience is a virtue... I just wish I was more virtuous.
People might be wondering, what about the Maxima? That thing was almost a part of my identity for the past few years. Well, as much as I would have loved to keep it for a lot longer, everything was pointing towards me giving it up to my sister. Of course I wasn't happy about it at the time, and I still miss my old baby, but at least it stays in the family and I will get to see her on breaks and some weekends. When my sis comes home, me and my ex will have to spend some time together catching up on old times. I'll hand over the keys to the G for a couple days, no prob.
I am really loving the new car so far, with all the snazzy features like radio/CD controls on the steering wheel and a rearview mirror that dims when the sun is too bright. But I gotta say, nothing will ever replace the Max. I'll always treasure the times we had together. I'll forever love the familiarity of sitting in that drivers seat and being in touch with everything around me. *sniff* I'd like to dedicate a few lines...
"How do I
say goodbye
to what we had?
The good times
that made us laugh
outweigh the bad.
I thought we'd get
to see forever
but forever's gone away.
It's so hard
to say goodbye
to yesterday.
And I'll take
with me the memories
To be my sunshine
after the rain
It's so hard
to say goodbye
to yesterday..."
hahaha before my blog gets any gayer, I should stop. Also, Olivia will start getting jealous if she ever reads this.
Someone has suggested that I take people for rides and charge them admission. Well, it's a nice car, but it's not that nice. It's not "Ford Tempo nice" by any stretch of the imagination, that's for sure. But if anyone still wants a ride, you can just ask and I will say yes (assuming that I like you).
By the way, I am guessing that with the changes coming up in my life, my blog will be at least somewhat affected. Don't know for sure, but I think the really really long entries are gonna be a thing of the past. I'm not sure I will update as often either, but we'll see. Believe me, I like writing blogs, but realistically, it's not gonna be as easy or accessible when I'm not working at home, when I would have loads of free time in between patches of business. Oh well, whatever happens happens.
Tuesday, October 01, 2002
Life, Baseball, and Football
A lot has been going on in my life lately. With the new job set to start next Monday, I've had to get a car, get insurance for it, get a new I-Pass, buy some "business casual" clothes, and I had to take a drug test this morning too. All those years of not abusing illegal substances is finally paying off!! Muahaha...
With all this stuff happening, I almost missed the fact that baseball's regular season just ended and the playoffs are starting. This time of year is always rather bittersweet for me. Yes, I love watching playoff baseball, but it also marks the official end of the White Sox and my fantasy team's seasons.
I've gotten used to the fact that my Sox aren't gonna be in the playoffs, and my fantasy team chokes every year. This year was especially hurtful for some reason. Despite having far and away the best hitting in the league, a great bullpen, and a supposedly solid core of veteran starting pitching, my team still finished in 2nd place, as it has in 3 out of the 4 years I've played.
Football season is well underway, but as much that is a good thing, I have a bad feeling about this year. Were it not for some luck involoved, the Bears could be 0-4 instead of 2-2 heading into Monday Night against the Packers. The defense doesn't look nearly as bulletproof after losing key players in the offseason and to injuries. Meanwhile, David Terrell catches like 2 passes a game and acts like he's Terrell Owens or Randy Moss. We don't need that attitude, David.
As for fantasy, this is shaping up to what might be my worst season ever. Take a gander at the following players: Kurt Warner, Corey Dillon, David Boston, Keyshawn Johnson, Joe Horn. What do each of these guys have in common? 1. They are all supposed big-name players that have been productive in the past few seasons. 2. They are all on my team. 3. They are all doing basically jack this year for me.
By far, the most painful is Kurt Warner. I absolutely despise this guy for what he has done to me. For the past 3 seasons, I swear he has averaged about 4 TDs and 500 yards per game in weeks he plays against my team. Finally, this year I get the 2nd overall pick in the draft, so I take him in the hopes that I can avoid being raped 2-3 times by him this year. He rewards me by throwing 8 interceptions to only 1 touchdown in 3-plus games, then bowing out with a pinky-injury that will keep him out 8-10 weeks. Sweet, eh? It's gonna be a long winter...
MLB Playoffs: First Round Predictions
Since the Sox aren't in the postseason, I really have nobody to root for. But I thought I might as well put up some predictions and analysis anyways.
National League
Braves over Giants in 4: While I do want to see Barry Bonds, Robb Nen, and Kenny Lofton win, they are really no match for the Braves. There is simply no hole in Atlanta's pitching, top to bottom. Solid starters, solid middle relief, solid closer. In the playoffs especially, good pitching beats good hitting. Not that the Braves are severely lacking in hitting, either. Chipper, Andruw, Sheffield should be able to provide more than enough firepower to carry the Bravos to the next round, at the very least.
D-backs over Cards in 5: I can't say I particularly like either team, but because of fantasy baseball, I hate the Diamondbacks much more. Still, I doubt that the Cardinals have nearly enough strength to overcome Arizona's gay duo. Doing it for Darryl Kile can only take them so far. I wish the matchups had been set differently, it would've been nice to see the Braves play the Giants in the League Championship Series because I like both of those teams a lot better.
American League
Yankees over Angels in 5: While the Angels were red-hot in the second half of the season, the Yanks were consistently good throughout the entire year. The bad news for Anaheim is that the Yankees seem to get even better once October rolls around. Look for a close series, but the experience and superior talent of the Yankees will shine through in the end.
Twins over A's in 4: I know what you're saying, how can you pick against Zito, Mulder, and Hudson in a 5 game series? Well, I can almost guarantee you that Billy Koch will blow at least one win for the team. And while the Twins aren't overpowering in either pitching and hitting, don't overlook their solid fundamentals and exceptional defense.
As I write, I see that the A's are beating the Twins. But no matter, I will not revise my predictions accordingly. As for the rest of the playoffs, I will save any extended analysis until the actual matchups are set. But I feel that this year we will see the Braves beat the Yankees in 7.
A Dudo509 Blogspot Special: My First Limericks
People have been writing lots of haikus lately. It has inspired me to express myself poetically. However, since I am not in the business of being a biter, I have decided to release my creative energy in the form of limericks. It might be the Irish blood in me, who knows? Anyways, enjoy...
My 17-inch monitor died,
so an old 14-inch one I tried.
But the screen is so tiny
a flat-panel, I should buy me,
Or else my eyes may go blind.
Soriano almost hit forty-forty,
A-Rod and Bonds are MVP worthy.
But Big Unit and Schilling,
my team, they love killing,
I guess it's just not meant to be.
What's the matter with David Terrell?
He hasn't even played all that well.
But he dances and shakes,
when just one catch he makes,
I'm thinking "man, what the hell?!"
The Vikings have quite a bad seed,
to no man does Randy Moss heed.
He's always been shady,
he ran over some lady,
and he probably smokes too much weed.
My team has a QB named Kurt,
this season he's been worth less than dirt.
I thought he could pass,
but now he sucks ass,
I'm almost glad he got hurt.
My pants are a little too baggy,
and my shirts are too beat up and crappy.
I must look respectable,
so-called "business casual,"
No more clothes from Abercrombie.
My Maxima brought me great bliss,
its color was green, or "Sage Mist."
My sis took it to drive,
but I got G-thirty-five,
So I guess my old car I won't miss.
I handed out resumes for a year,
Not having a job was my fear.
But I worked with my father,
until Northrop's offer,
and now I have a career.
Olivia's too busy with academics,
Studying her biochem and genetics.
She's got no time free,
to hang out with me,
so here I am writing my limericks.
A lot has been going on in my life lately. With the new job set to start next Monday, I've had to get a car, get insurance for it, get a new I-Pass, buy some "business casual" clothes, and I had to take a drug test this morning too. All those years of not abusing illegal substances is finally paying off!! Muahaha...
With all this stuff happening, I almost missed the fact that baseball's regular season just ended and the playoffs are starting. This time of year is always rather bittersweet for me. Yes, I love watching playoff baseball, but it also marks the official end of the White Sox and my fantasy team's seasons.
I've gotten used to the fact that my Sox aren't gonna be in the playoffs, and my fantasy team chokes every year. This year was especially hurtful for some reason. Despite having far and away the best hitting in the league, a great bullpen, and a supposedly solid core of veteran starting pitching, my team still finished in 2nd place, as it has in 3 out of the 4 years I've played.
Football season is well underway, but as much that is a good thing, I have a bad feeling about this year. Were it not for some luck involoved, the Bears could be 0-4 instead of 2-2 heading into Monday Night against the Packers. The defense doesn't look nearly as bulletproof after losing key players in the offseason and to injuries. Meanwhile, David Terrell catches like 2 passes a game and acts like he's Terrell Owens or Randy Moss. We don't need that attitude, David.
As for fantasy, this is shaping up to what might be my worst season ever. Take a gander at the following players: Kurt Warner, Corey Dillon, David Boston, Keyshawn Johnson, Joe Horn. What do each of these guys have in common? 1. They are all supposed big-name players that have been productive in the past few seasons. 2. They are all on my team. 3. They are all doing basically jack this year for me.
By far, the most painful is Kurt Warner. I absolutely despise this guy for what he has done to me. For the past 3 seasons, I swear he has averaged about 4 TDs and 500 yards per game in weeks he plays against my team. Finally, this year I get the 2nd overall pick in the draft, so I take him in the hopes that I can avoid being raped 2-3 times by him this year. He rewards me by throwing 8 interceptions to only 1 touchdown in 3-plus games, then bowing out with a pinky-injury that will keep him out 8-10 weeks. Sweet, eh? It's gonna be a long winter...
MLB Playoffs: First Round Predictions
Since the Sox aren't in the postseason, I really have nobody to root for. But I thought I might as well put up some predictions and analysis anyways.
National League
Braves over Giants in 4: While I do want to see Barry Bonds, Robb Nen, and Kenny Lofton win, they are really no match for the Braves. There is simply no hole in Atlanta's pitching, top to bottom. Solid starters, solid middle relief, solid closer. In the playoffs especially, good pitching beats good hitting. Not that the Braves are severely lacking in hitting, either. Chipper, Andruw, Sheffield should be able to provide more than enough firepower to carry the Bravos to the next round, at the very least.
D-backs over Cards in 5: I can't say I particularly like either team, but because of fantasy baseball, I hate the Diamondbacks much more. Still, I doubt that the Cardinals have nearly enough strength to overcome Arizona's gay duo. Doing it for Darryl Kile can only take them so far. I wish the matchups had been set differently, it would've been nice to see the Braves play the Giants in the League Championship Series because I like both of those teams a lot better.
American League
Yankees over Angels in 5: While the Angels were red-hot in the second half of the season, the Yanks were consistently good throughout the entire year. The bad news for Anaheim is that the Yankees seem to get even better once October rolls around. Look for a close series, but the experience and superior talent of the Yankees will shine through in the end.
Twins over A's in 4: I know what you're saying, how can you pick against Zito, Mulder, and Hudson in a 5 game series? Well, I can almost guarantee you that Billy Koch will blow at least one win for the team. And while the Twins aren't overpowering in either pitching and hitting, don't overlook their solid fundamentals and exceptional defense.
As I write, I see that the A's are beating the Twins. But no matter, I will not revise my predictions accordingly. As for the rest of the playoffs, I will save any extended analysis until the actual matchups are set. But I feel that this year we will see the Braves beat the Yankees in 7.
A Dudo509 Blogspot Special: My First Limericks
People have been writing lots of haikus lately. It has inspired me to express myself poetically. However, since I am not in the business of being a biter, I have decided to release my creative energy in the form of limericks. It might be the Irish blood in me, who knows? Anyways, enjoy...
My 17-inch monitor died,
so an old 14-inch one I tried.
But the screen is so tiny
a flat-panel, I should buy me,
Or else my eyes may go blind.
Soriano almost hit forty-forty,
A-Rod and Bonds are MVP worthy.
But Big Unit and Schilling,
my team, they love killing,
I guess it's just not meant to be.
What's the matter with David Terrell?
He hasn't even played all that well.
But he dances and shakes,
when just one catch he makes,
I'm thinking "man, what the hell?!"
The Vikings have quite a bad seed,
to no man does Randy Moss heed.
He's always been shady,
he ran over some lady,
and he probably smokes too much weed.
My team has a QB named Kurt,
this season he's been worth less than dirt.
I thought he could pass,
but now he sucks ass,
I'm almost glad he got hurt.
My pants are a little too baggy,
and my shirts are too beat up and crappy.
I must look respectable,
so-called "business casual,"
No more clothes from Abercrombie.
My Maxima brought me great bliss,
its color was green, or "Sage Mist."
My sis took it to drive,
but I got G-thirty-five,
So I guess my old car I won't miss.
I handed out resumes for a year,
Not having a job was my fear.
But I worked with my father,
until Northrop's offer,
and now I have a career.
Olivia's too busy with academics,
Studying her biochem and genetics.
She's got no time free,
to hang out with me,
so here I am writing my limericks.
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