Last year, Olivia went on a medical/missions trip to some remote areas in Thailand and was showing me some pictures she took while she was there. One picture was of a lady with really blackened teeth (shown above), and as you can see, they're pretty freaking dark. Apparently, they think that black teeth is attractive and actually chew beetlenuts (kind of like tobacco) to stain their teeth as dark as possible.
By the way, this blog isn't going to have much of a point, except I just thought it was interesting how different people and different cultures can have such differing concepts about what is attractive and what is not, at least as far as teeth goes.
Mrs. Kensington: "In Britain, in the 60's, you could be a sex symbol and have bad teeth." As you can see, the generally accepted definition of "bad teeth" are the crooked, yellow teeth of Austin Powers. However, thanks to his abilities as a special agent and International Man of Mystery, he was still able to shag Miss Kensington, Alotta Fagina, Ivana Humpalot, Felicity Shagwell, and others.
Anyways, how about some examples of "good teeth":
Most of us who grew up in this country think of "perfect" teeth being straight and white. Like TomKat. People spend literally thousands of dollars on braces and a plethora of teeth whitening products, all in the hopes of achieving that "million dollar smile".
Back when I lived in Taiwan (and as far as I know, this is still true), the most popular brand of toothpaste was called "Hae-Ren-Ya-Gow", which translates in English to "Black Person Toothpaste". No joke. Actually the English word they originally used on the label was "Darkie", but as you can see from the above photo, it has since been changed to "Darlie", presumably due to someone's complaint. I guess there are people who think a toothpaste brand being named "Darkie" is offensive, imagine that. Yet, the Chinese name of the brand remains unchanged, "Black Person Toothpaste". (Again, I am 100% serious, if you still don't believe me, look it up yourself or ask anyone else from Taiwan to confirm.)
Anyways, I guess that means that the typical Chinese person's idea of perfect teeth is fairly similar to the American model - shiny, bright pearly whites. Except instead of associating this ideal with movie stars like TomKat, they look to a Black man in a top hat for a model.
But as the next example shows, not every black person necessarily aspires to have their teeth look like the Darlie man. At least not these days.
Mike Jones: "Before the ice was in my grill, before I got my major deal, these hoes wouldn't give a damn if I was heah, chyeah".
A few months ago, a friend randomly posed the question of how much I thought a grill would cost. Not knowing that he was referring to the mouth jewelry variety, I started telling him about all the research I did about gas vs. charcoal, and the top brands of grill makers out there that I considered when I was buying my grill.
Maybe I am just that out of touch with today's hip folk. I just never realized how important they are to enhancing my look before Nelly and Mike Jones came along and showed us the way.
No wonder I haven't been getting any hoes. I better "call the jewelry store and have them make me a grill." Oh and not just any plain old grill, it's gotta be a grill with ice in it. Otherwise, still no hoes.
