More Joe Chens
One of my earliest entries ever posted on this blog was about my name, and how it's way too common. I talked about the problems I had in getting a email account with my name (without having to add a whole bunch of numbers after it), or when I was at school in Taiwan and another guy named Joe Chen had the locker above mine.
Well, it seems this issue has even followed me to my current job. It doesn't happen too often, but every once in a while, I get an email at work that was intended for one of the TWO other Joe Chen's at this company. I guess it should only be expected that in a corporation that includes over 100,000 employees, my name wouldn't be unique. Fortunately, both of the other Joes are at a different location than mine, somewhere out in California.
So anyways, I got one of Cali Joe Chen's emails when I got into work this morning, and forwarded it to him. He replied later to say thanks, and I noticed that the timestamp between my email and his reply was almost exactly 2 hours apart.
It got me wondering about this other Joe Chen. We obviously already share the same name and employer, what about the rest of his life? Is his daily routine exactly like mine, except 2 time zones away? Like I get to work at 8 am every day, then check my email, look at Yahoo Chicagoland weather for kicks, and read the Chicago Sun Times for news on the White Sox, etc.
2 hours later, when it's 10 am here and 8 am on the West Coast, does Cali Joe Chen get to work and do the same thing that I did 2 hours earlier? Check his email, look up Yahoo weather for Orange County, read the LA Times coverage of the Dodgers or whatever?
What about around the world? There must be thousands of Joe Chens between China, Taiwan, Hong Kong, etc. Is there a Joe Chen who wakes up in Taipei 13 hours after I do, goes to work, and reads the Taipei Times about the Brother Elephants (the most popular team in Taiwan's pro baseball league)? Can it be said that "the sun never sets on Joe Chen"?
See, these are the questions that confound a man when his name is so common. If you have a unique name, consider yourself lucky. I already promised to myself that when I have kids, I'm naming them something like Zoltan-59C or Seven. Seven Chen, haha I kinda like that. Actually maybe it should be more like Twenty-four Chen, I guess, since Joe Crede is like the Mickey Mantle of my day.
Although, there is one good thing about having a generic name like mine. I don't have to worry about masking or redacting (that's my new word now, thanks to the HGH investigations) my own name in this blog. You try to search for "Joe Chen" on the internet, and you'll have to go through page after page of fobby grad students before you reach my page (if at all). My name has made me practically "unGoogleable".
Wednesday, June 28, 2006
Saturday, June 24, 2006
Thursday, June 15, 2006
(It's For The Kids)
I read this article today about how there's a new ringtone out there that can be heard by kids only, and not adults:
Students find ringtone adults can't hear
I didn't know that was even possible, but apparently it is, if you set the frequency at the right range. Kinda like those "dog whistles" I guess.
The news is alarming to me, though, because I didn't think there was that much difference between an adult's hearing and a child's hearing. It's not like with dogs and humans, this is human to human we're talking about, just different ages.
I know my hearing will go eventually, but I always thought your hearing didn't start degrading until you were elderly (like 60's or so), and by then, you probably have other things to worry about. But it doesn't "sound" (har har) like they are talking about grandmas and grandpas who need hearing aids. The article distinguishes between "5th graders" or "teenagers" and "adults", and if anything, I'm thinking that I fall into the "adults" category.
That's not cool. I guess my body is breaking down even faster than I thought it would. Next thing you know I'll be wearing sweaters in the middle of August and smelling like mothballs. Umm, let's hope not.
By the way, my favorite sentence from the article:
"As people age, many develop what's known as aging ear..."
Hmmmm... FASCINATING
I read this article today about how there's a new ringtone out there that can be heard by kids only, and not adults:
Students find ringtone adults can't hear
I didn't know that was even possible, but apparently it is, if you set the frequency at the right range. Kinda like those "dog whistles" I guess.
The news is alarming to me, though, because I didn't think there was that much difference between an adult's hearing and a child's hearing. It's not like with dogs and humans, this is human to human we're talking about, just different ages.
I know my hearing will go eventually, but I always thought your hearing didn't start degrading until you were elderly (like 60's or so), and by then, you probably have other things to worry about. But it doesn't "sound" (har har) like they are talking about grandmas and grandpas who need hearing aids. The article distinguishes between "5th graders" or "teenagers" and "adults", and if anything, I'm thinking that I fall into the "adults" category.
That's not cool. I guess my body is breaking down even faster than I thought it would. Next thing you know I'll be wearing sweaters in the middle of August and smelling like mothballs. Umm, let's hope not.
By the way, my favorite sentence from the article:
"As people age, many develop what's known as aging ear..."
Hmmmm... FASCINATING
Saturday, June 03, 2006
DREams in Digital
If there are any girls reading this, you might want to skip this one. Seriously.
There's been a lot of commercials lately for these new drugs that are supposed to treat men's prostate problems. The two brands I see the most are Avodart and Flomax, and seriously, watching these commercials almost has me convinced that I need to see my doctor for BPH (which is somehow short for an enlarged prostate disorder, I have no idea how).
From watching the commercials, I gather that the main symptom is having to pee excessively often. Well that sure sounds familiar. Some of you may have already noticed that I'm always going to the bathroom. It's not to check my makeup or gossip about boys either.
It has been suggested to me in the past that I have a small bladder, which as you might imagine, isn't my explanation of choice. (I prefer to think of it as being because I have especially good circulation or a super efficient digestive system. That or I drink more water than everyone else.)
I'd much rather have a small bladder, though, than an enlarged prostate. I was intrigued enough on the subject of prostate disorders that I decided to do some digging on Google about it. I didn't get very far, because it isn't particularly enjoyable to read about some of the gory details on the subject.
But one thing I did learn, though, is that the common procedure for doctors to check for prostate problems is called a "Digital Rectal Exam". Most of us have probably heard of rectal exams, and they don't sound too fun do they. I am definitely not looking forward to getting those when I get older, to say the least.
But anyways, when I first saw mention of a test called the "Digital Rectal Exam", it gave me some hope. When I hear the word "digital", certain things come to mind. I think about digital music, digital cable TV, digital watches, digital tuning on your radio. Basically, I associate any "digital" stuff with modern technology, advanced electronics, etc.
So the first thought that came to mind was, hey, maybe someone came up with a nice, non-intrusive way to examine my prostate. Like some sort of mini X-ray or MRI or something that "digitally" scans that region of your body for abnormalities that does not involve poking at the rectum, I'm all for it.
I gotta be honest, I am all for any procedure that provides an alternative to rectum-pokage. It's like when you're a kid and you find out that you can take a vaccine in pill form, instead of getting a painful shot. Except multiplied by a factor of about 100, because shots only last a fraction of a second, and aren't nearly as emasculating.
Unfortunately, my excitement didn't last very long, as I did some more investigating into this so-called "Digital Rectal Exam". Turns out that in this case, the word "digital" was not used to describe an advanced electronic test at all. Nope, they meant "digital" as in the lesser used, definition #2 (reference Dictionary.com):
http://dictionary.reference.com/search?q=digital
Dig-i-tal
2. Operated or done with the fingers
So basically, the "Digital Rectal Exam" is just a fancier name for that same rectal exam we all hear nightmare stories about. Guess there's no escaping your friendly doctor's finger. All I could say is, wow. Who would have thought that in this "Digital Age" that we live in, they could call something "digital" and have it not be even remotely related to electronics? Maybe a better question is, who even calls fingers "digits" anymore? What are we, in 18th century England? And while we're at it, is there such thing as an "Analog Rectal Exam"? I shudder to think of what that might entail. (Okay I know, now I've gone too far. Sorry.)
Anyways, as I came to this cruel realization, I pondered whether the decision to call rectal exams "digital" was some elaborate joke played on the male population. In all likelihood, by the same man-hating lesbian who invented catheters. All I know is, the next time I see my old college roommate Ray, I will surely urge him to press his employers at GE Medical Systems to make "electronic rectal examinations" their highest research priority.
In the meantime, I guess it's digital rectal exams for all of us guys. That, and we'll have to maybe put up with taking some of these fancy drugs they're advertising. The good news is that apparently the only side effects they have are minor - such as "decrease in semen" (who needs semen anyways), or "fainting from standing up" (hey that sounds kinda fun actually). I think I saw "impotence" thrown in there too, for good measure.
Hmmm... in hindsight, I probably should have advised guys to skip this blog too. Oh well, too late now. If you would like to read more about Digital Rectal Exams (also known as the DRE, I'm guessing it's named after the doctor who invented it, the same guy produced Snoop Dogg and Eminem's rap careers, if I'm not mistaken), here are some more links:
http://www.webmd.com/hw/colorectal_cancer/hw4404.asp
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Digital_rectal_exam
http://www.flomax-bph.com/jsp/toolsResources/ToolsResourcesController.jpf
If there are any girls reading this, you might want to skip this one. Seriously.
There's been a lot of commercials lately for these new drugs that are supposed to treat men's prostate problems. The two brands I see the most are Avodart and Flomax, and seriously, watching these commercials almost has me convinced that I need to see my doctor for BPH (which is somehow short for an enlarged prostate disorder, I have no idea how).
From watching the commercials, I gather that the main symptom is having to pee excessively often. Well that sure sounds familiar. Some of you may have already noticed that I'm always going to the bathroom. It's not to check my makeup or gossip about boys either.
It has been suggested to me in the past that I have a small bladder, which as you might imagine, isn't my explanation of choice. (I prefer to think of it as being because I have especially good circulation or a super efficient digestive system. That or I drink more water than everyone else.)
I'd much rather have a small bladder, though, than an enlarged prostate. I was intrigued enough on the subject of prostate disorders that I decided to do some digging on Google about it. I didn't get very far, because it isn't particularly enjoyable to read about some of the gory details on the subject.
But one thing I did learn, though, is that the common procedure for doctors to check for prostate problems is called a "Digital Rectal Exam". Most of us have probably heard of rectal exams, and they don't sound too fun do they. I am definitely not looking forward to getting those when I get older, to say the least.
But anyways, when I first saw mention of a test called the "Digital Rectal Exam", it gave me some hope. When I hear the word "digital", certain things come to mind. I think about digital music, digital cable TV, digital watches, digital tuning on your radio. Basically, I associate any "digital" stuff with modern technology, advanced electronics, etc.
So the first thought that came to mind was, hey, maybe someone came up with a nice, non-intrusive way to examine my prostate. Like some sort of mini X-ray or MRI or something that "digitally" scans that region of your body for abnormalities that does not involve poking at the rectum, I'm all for it.
I gotta be honest, I am all for any procedure that provides an alternative to rectum-pokage. It's like when you're a kid and you find out that you can take a vaccine in pill form, instead of getting a painful shot. Except multiplied by a factor of about 100, because shots only last a fraction of a second, and aren't nearly as emasculating.
Unfortunately, my excitement didn't last very long, as I did some more investigating into this so-called "Digital Rectal Exam". Turns out that in this case, the word "digital" was not used to describe an advanced electronic test at all. Nope, they meant "digital" as in the lesser used, definition #2 (reference Dictionary.com):
http://dictionary.reference.com/search?q=digital
Dig-i-tal
2. Operated or done with the fingers
So basically, the "Digital Rectal Exam" is just a fancier name for that same rectal exam we all hear nightmare stories about. Guess there's no escaping your friendly doctor's finger. All I could say is, wow. Who would have thought that in this "Digital Age" that we live in, they could call something "digital" and have it not be even remotely related to electronics? Maybe a better question is, who even calls fingers "digits" anymore? What are we, in 18th century England? And while we're at it, is there such thing as an "Analog Rectal Exam"? I shudder to think of what that might entail. (Okay I know, now I've gone too far. Sorry.)
Anyways, as I came to this cruel realization, I pondered whether the decision to call rectal exams "digital" was some elaborate joke played on the male population. In all likelihood, by the same man-hating lesbian who invented catheters. All I know is, the next time I see my old college roommate Ray, I will surely urge him to press his employers at GE Medical Systems to make "electronic rectal examinations" their highest research priority.
In the meantime, I guess it's digital rectal exams for all of us guys. That, and we'll have to maybe put up with taking some of these fancy drugs they're advertising. The good news is that apparently the only side effects they have are minor - such as "decrease in semen" (who needs semen anyways), or "fainting from standing up" (hey that sounds kinda fun actually). I think I saw "impotence" thrown in there too, for good measure.
Hmmm... in hindsight, I probably should have advised guys to skip this blog too. Oh well, too late now. If you would like to read more about Digital Rectal Exams (also known as the DRE, I'm guessing it's named after the doctor who invented it, the same guy produced Snoop Dogg and Eminem's rap careers, if I'm not mistaken), here are some more links:
http://www.webmd.com/hw/colorectal_cancer/hw4404.asp
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Digital_rectal_exam
http://www.flomax-bph.com/jsp/toolsResources/ToolsResourcesController.jpf
Thursday, June 01, 2006
The Skilling Connection
I was reading an article on the Enron the other day, when I came across an interesting tidbit. Former Enron CEO Jeffrey Skilling, who was just convicted of fraud and a bunch of other good stuff related to the Enron scandal, is the younger brother of none other than...
WGN's weatherman, Tom Skilling
I'm pretty sure that I've railed on weathermen before in this blog, and probably have singled out Tom Skilling at one point or another, for being a waste of space. Little did I know that he was the brother of one of the central figures in perhaps the worst "white-collar crime" in recent history.
See, I knew there was a reason I didn't trust Tom Skilling. This merely confirms what I always suspected all along. That beneath that jolly smile and grandfather-like demeanor, lies a man with a twisted psyche. You can't escape genetics. Beware, if your last name is Skilling, you're bound to one of two possible fates:
1) Ruining the lives of thousands of hard working Americans by unethical management of a corporation, or
2) Ruining my life with your faulty weather predictions.
There are no exceptions. The world needs to rid itself of this scourge that calls itself the Skilling family, I say.
I was reading an article on the Enron the other day, when I came across an interesting tidbit. Former Enron CEO Jeffrey Skilling, who was just convicted of fraud and a bunch of other good stuff related to the Enron scandal, is the younger brother of none other than...
WGN's weatherman, Tom Skilling
I'm pretty sure that I've railed on weathermen before in this blog, and probably have singled out Tom Skilling at one point or another, for being a waste of space. Little did I know that he was the brother of one of the central figures in perhaps the worst "white-collar crime" in recent history.
See, I knew there was a reason I didn't trust Tom Skilling. This merely confirms what I always suspected all along. That beneath that jolly smile and grandfather-like demeanor, lies a man with a twisted psyche. You can't escape genetics. Beware, if your last name is Skilling, you're bound to one of two possible fates:
1) Ruining the lives of thousands of hard working Americans by unethical management of a corporation, or
2) Ruining my life with your faulty weather predictions.
There are no exceptions. The world needs to rid itself of this scourge that calls itself the Skilling family, I say.
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