Health

I've never been very body-conscious, but as I get older it seems like I should be more aware of my health. Like I never used to worry about the long-term effects of drinking, but now even when I just have a couple beers, it makes me wonder if my liver is gonna turn out like those horrifying pictures they used to show us in health.

And last month I made the switch to Miracle Whip for my daily lunch, after realizing how bad mayo is for you. Calories: 120. Calories from Fat: 120. Ummm.... sweet. The thing is, I don't remember looking at the label of anything before, but I've been doing it more lately for whatever reason. Not that I'm a psycho calorie-counter or testing my blood pressure and cholesterol every day, I'm just more conscious is all. I feel fine today, but I would like to be fine 15, 20, 30 years down the road too. So I figure it's probably worthwhile to take better care of myself now while it's early.

That means I will try to control my cravings for wings and other unhealthy foods. When I do eat out, I will order water more often and beer less often. My sandwiches will use a lower-fat spread, on wheat bread, preferably with lean white meat.

But all in all, I still think I'm in pretty good shape. At least I have no signs of arthritis yet.

40 Years

There's this guy here at work who's retiring today after 40 years with the company. That just blows my mind... how before I was even born, he had already been working for over 17 years. During the next 23 years, I learned to walk, talk, use the potty, read, play piano, drive a car, and craft. I moved from unincorporated Downers Grove to incorporated Downers Grove to Taipei to Darien to Urbana to Champaign back to Darien and now to Palatine. I went through preschool, kindergarten, 1st-6th grade, junior high, high school, and college. All this time, he was in the same place, working at Northrop.

So me and some of the younger people here were talking about how we're always trying to just get through the week, and the weekend always seems so far away. And here's this man who has been through about 2000 of these weeks. I could imagine myself working here for a long time, but 40 years? That's just plain scary. Props to the old guy.

I don't know if that's a good thing or bad thing, though, to be doing something for that many years. It reminds me of About Schmidt. When you've been living the same life for so long, and suddenly it all changes at age 65, how do you handle something like that? Man, if I left this job right now after 6 months, I would really miss it, the people and the work and the sense of accomplishment. And we've all seen how Jordan couldn't stay away from basketball after retiring, twice.

On the plus side, there are worse things that can happen to you in life than to experience 40 years of job security, work your way up in a large Fortune 100 corporation, retire with a lot of money, probably vacation and just coast the rest of your days, then leave a respectable inheritance to your kids.

I Put The OVER in Overtime

After about 3 months of working OT, this week I am gonna finally take myself off this schedule. I have been looking forward to this point for a long time, when I get to leave work at 4:30 and go home to a place closer than 10 minutes away.

What to do with this extra time? I don't know yet. Yesterday after work, I went to Jewel to pick up some garlic and oranges. Went home, made rice, a dish of spinach, and microwaved a bowl of beef I brought from home. I make a mean spiznatch, by the way. Anyways, I ate dinner, washed the dishes, and it was not even 6:30 yet. I felt so proud of accomplishing all that by myself, when only a few weeks ago, I would only be just getting home at 6:30.

Next, I watched Everybody Loves Raymond. This is one of those shows I never really watched before but now I wish I did, cause I discovered that it is very entertaining. Up until last week, I had only seen about 3 episodes and it seems like one of the three was always on whenever I happen to catch the show. But anyways, I now think it is one of the funniest sitcoms on TV after watching it a couple times in the past week. Even though all of the people in the show are annoying, it just cracks me up so much.

The only thing is, I would rather shoot myself than be in a marriage like Raymond and his wife. To me, that's like the definition of lifelong misery right there. I don't care if she is attractive for a housewife-aged woman, can you imagine being ripped on by your spouse all the time? And I don't think I have ever seen them even kiss (let alone anything else), instead he is always saying stuff like "don't worry honey, I won't bother you for sex tonight." I mean, that's hilarious to watch, but it wouldn't be so funny if that was me. That's not what I picture a happy marriage to be.

I guess it's partly a reminder to me that love is more important than looks. This coming from a guy that has Britney Spears stickers in his wallet. But seriously, I don't wanna marry her, I just wanna admire her from afar. haha...

Maybe I will write a more in-depth blog about love vs. looks sometime, but I had a different plan for this blog so that will have to wait. Since I have 2-3 extra non-work, non-sleep hours in the day now, I'm gonna list some goals I would like to accomplish with this gift of time.

1. Learn to cook - I routinely mess up fried rice and boiling eggs, so this could be tough. I don't expect to be Iron Chef Chen, but it would be nice if I knew at least a few more dishes. In this day and age, I don't think guys can really count on the girlfriend or wife to cook anymore. Simply not gonna happen, so get used to it. It's good for me to be more self-sufficient anyways. But yeah, the first step should come later this week, when I will pick up a book at Barnes to get me started.

2. Get a telescope and learn about stars and shiznit - Except for a couple of my nicer friends, almost everyone I know either looked at me funny or flat out called me a nerd when I told them I wanted to do this. So SCREW YOU ALL. I'm getting a tizzelescope, and looking at frickin stars. I was gonna do it alone anyways. I already have the vision in my mind: open up the big window of my room on a clear summer night, put some Chopin on in the background, lose myself in the craters of the moon, engaged in deep thought and personal discovery. All you haters will be missing out.

3. Watch Godfather movies - I have wanted to watch Godfather for the longest time. Haven't seen it before, but I liked Goodfellas and Casino, and I'm sure the Godfather series is even better than those. You might even say they are the "godfather" of all mafia drama movies (yeah, I'm so clever). Well, Brian has them on video and I will have to make time to watch them in the coming weeks. After that, maybe the Sopranos. Then, possibly 24 or Sex and the City. Also The Natural and Field of Dreams. While we're at it, why not Major League? Caddyshack sounds good too. There's too much stuff I haven't seen.

4. Get Pocket PC - I talked about the Toshiba e750 about a month ago, well, now I'm waiting either for the price to come down a little, or rebates to be offered, or maybe newer and cooler models to come out. There are rumors of a new HP IPaq model to be released soon. But definitely, within another month, I want to pick one up. There's so many things I think I could use it for, that I won't bother to list them all here. Basically, they are all nerdy purposes anyways so there's no point in feeding my nerd-image. We'll see whose productivity will be skyrocketed in a few months, and who will be laughing then. muahahaaha

5. Spend at least one night/week at the library - Last week, my favorite Palatine-native Cindy showed me around the Palatine Library. I was seriously in awe. I mean, Indian Prairie Public Library at Darien was pretty nice, but there's just no comparison. This place has an underground parking deck. The magazine section and video section are huge, not to mention computers everywhere. I even saw Mech Chick there, the obsession of Master P's college freshman year (which faded later on). I can't wait until I get two things in writing with my name and Palatine address on them so I can apply for my library card. Then not only will I be able to borrow books, but I could also use my pickup line on Olivia: "Good thing I got my library card, cause I'm CHECKING YOU OUT!!" Yes, she'll love that one.

6. Organize a game of softball - This is one of the things I miss most from school last year. Getting a bunch of us together, going to an open field, and just playing for a couple hours. Using folded up 24-pack beer cases as the bases, hitting until the ball unraveled and then driving with Chras to Dick's Sporting Goods to buy another one. Hopefully we can pull at least one game together sometime soon, and multiple games to follow in the summer months.

7. Find Sean Paul and kick his ass - I hate that song. Maybe it's partly because I understand zero words in it, but it's just annoying. The only good part is the little kid dancing in the video, but that's only like 10 seconds.

*****

Nobody knew the origin of the quote from my blog about my computer: "Why you gotta be wastin my flava?!" Interestingly enough, I saw this movie on TV last night as VH1's "Movies That Rock". For those that might be wondering, it was said by Kenny (Special K) in "Can't Hardly Wait".

Lately I've been reading a lot of blogs by people who are graduating this May. It's gives me a weird feeling because exactly one year ago, that was me. Realizing things like "I have 13 more days of class" and "This could be the last final I take, EVER", it really doesn't seem like that long ago when I went through those phases.

And when I talk to people who are about to graduate next month, I never know what to say to them. I wish I had some great advice to offer, or experiences to share about post-college life, but I guess I'm still kind of wandering myself. Even though it's been 11 months, and in these 11 months I've started working full-time and moved out on my own, I don't know if it's ever sunk in that I'm done with school. You might even say that a large part of me still feels like he lives in room 312 at Green Balconies.

So if you are reading this and happen to be graduating in May, don't expect any awesome advice from me about "the real world". But I will say congrats and welcome to our post-college community. Join us in our cool club of fun.

My Computer - Memoirs

Rewind to freshman year of college:

Andy and I arrive at FAR on a cool, brisk day in August. Books in one hand, pencils and calculator in the other, both of us ready and excited for the coming 4 years of hardcore learning. Other possessions accompanying us from home: my 27" TV and Nintendo 64 (in case there was time left over after class and studying), his fridge, VCR, and videos - The Usual Suspects (for people to come over and fall asleep through it halfway), Titanic (for the ladies), and Basic Instinct with Special Features (for Andy).

But the focus of any guy's dorm room, no matter how big the TV or how loud the stereo, is the computer. A room without a computer is like a chicken without a head - lost in no man's land, and pretty much useless. It is your connection to the Internet, your source of mp3s, your connection to AOL and telnet email, and most importantly of all, home to the greatest video game of them all: Starcraft.

Unfortunately, that particular computer was already on its dying legs by the time we got to school. Music would skip if you tried running any other programs at the same time. The screen would freeze for no reason. And my battle.net homies got pretty used to seeing the popup screen:

"Waiting for players:
[] Dudo~509~
0:45 ... 0:33 ... 0:27 ..."

So I took my lumps and suffered through that piece of crap for a whole school year. Not letting me telnet to students.uiuc.edu was one thing, and I guess I could deal with losing my ECE Mallard homework once in a while to a random system freeze. But it was getting to the point where my crafting was being hampered. Many times I would cry out to the comp in frustration, "damn, why you gotta be wasting my flava?" (anyone know where that quote is from?). For there are few things that irk a man more than the presence of lag, especially when he is engaged in craft among the stars.

Fast forward to sophomore year:

I arrive at ISR with Anuj. It is a sunny afternoon. All our belongings, 27" TV included, are mashed into the backseat or trunk of his '92 Toyota Corolla. I step to the front desk with excitement, and let out a yelp of glee as the desk chick (*not the fabled "ISR desk chick" of Poongbunkorian lore) informs me of 2 large Dell boxes with my name on it.

I quickly signed for the packages, and brought them to my room. Set up my 17" monitor, speakers with subwoofer, and the smooth cream-skinned tower of power on the desk, and took a step back to admire its beauty. It was love at first sight.

What followed were some of the best years of my life. Filled with many joyous moments, skip-free music, multiple windows of ESPN.com GameCast open, downloading of all the Backstreet Boys and Britney Spears videos I wanted, and of course, lag-less craft on top of everything else.

Over the years, I took good care of my baby, and she took good care of me. When the 13.6 GB hard drive was getting cramped, I got her a 40 GB addition. When the 128 MB of RAM was not cutting it, I upped the number to 320. She wanted a CD burner to keep up with her friends, and I gladly obliged. Whenever she started to get a little too chubby around the registry, I made sure to give her the best lipo action possible, with a clean format and upgrade to Windows 2000. But through it all, the trusty Intel PIII-550 processor and motherboard stayed true.

Fast forward again, to Summer 2002:

My baby starts to show her age. Faster and better processors now dominate the market. My 17" CRT monitor, once the king of computer displays, burns out, perhaps caving under the pressure. The pressure of being constantly compared not only to the larger 19 and 20 inchers, but the new flashy flat-panel LCDs as well. Meanwhile, the dreaded Starcraft lag lurks in the shadows, rearing its ugly head whenever I try to run too many programs or fail to reboot regularly enough.

Still, I pressed on. For I am not a man akin to coldly ditch a loved one, simply when times get rough. But time is a silent killer that shows no mercy. Unlike me, my computer doesn't get better, sexier, or more refined with age; it only gets worse. And now, it appears to be breathing its final breaths.

It's a tough pill to swallow, when someone you care so deeply about is ready to pass on. No matter how hard you try to resist and hang on tight, the waves of change are far too forceful and cannot be deterred for long. As I tried to play the special features of the Crossroads DVD last night and was greeted by a screen of jumbled characters and graphics, words could not describe the feelings inside me.

Though I hid it well, for the sake of onlookers, an overwhelming sense of panic came over me as I realized the extent of this loss. I reset the computer - twice - with no response. Eventually the soft, deep blue eyes of my Dell Dimension would reopen, bringing a huge sigh of relief, but irreparable damage had already been done. For I now realized that those eyes would not stay open forever, as I had once hoped. Try as I might, there could be no denying the fact that her time was short and finite.

So I sit and wait, surrounded by uncertainty so strong it is virtually palpable. My baby is still with me for now, but for how long? When will the next attack of system failure come, and will she survive it? What will I do once she is gone for good? And will I ever be able to find the same solace and tender love in the arms of another?

The questions are many, the answers are few. Such goes the way of life, I suppose. As one journeys along in the quest for answers, he encounters far more questions than he ever anticipated. Perhaps we are not meant to know certain things - the truth is hidden from us and revealed only when the time is right. Still, I persist. I shall continue to travel this road, until I myself reach its very end.

*****

Yes, I know it's just a computer, and yes, I am mostly joking. You know how I write, it starts out innocently and spirals out of control.

But I'm not kidding about lag, though. I really hate lag.

Also, the Crossroads DVD incident was based on a true story. There were three of the said onlookers who could verify it.