This morning I woke up and my room was still dark. Unfortunately, it wasn't because I woke up too early, it was because it was all cloudy and pouring outside. You know, the rain sure puts a "damper" on my mood for the day, harharhar.
I think by far the best radio commercials I've ever heard are for Bud Light. Usually, commercials on the radio are either really lame gimmicky jokes, or just the basic "Call this number now for more information" kind of thing. But, there's this series of ads for Bud Light that's called "Real American Heroes" or something, that I think is hilarious. Each one "salutes" a certain person, like a Truck Driver, Coffee Shop Employee, or "Mr. Tiny Thong Bikini Wearer". So they play this slow cheesy rock music with a guy singing weird echoes in the background, and then they have a narrator explain why they are saluting the person. Like yesterday, I heard one for Next-Day Carpet Man, going something like this:
cheesy rock intro
Narrator - Today we salute you, Next-Day Carpet Man, because when we're jonesin' for some carpet, we're jonesin' for carpet
Rock Singer Echo - Jonesin' for some carpet....
And so forth. If you've never heard any of these commercials I'm talking about, then you probably wouldn't understand, and think I'm a dumbass. You're missing out though, so I suggest you pay attention to commercials on the radio more.
I've been listening to the new Outkast 2-CD set for a couple weeks now, and I'm not sure if I like it. The two singles they have on the radio/MTV right now are good, and the skits are entertaining as always, but it seems like there's a lot of garbage tracks of crappy songs they threw in, just so each of those guys could have a separate CD. They might've been better off combining it all into one disc. Or, maybe the stuff is just so weird this time that I just don't get it.
Outkast has always had some lyrics that are so random and barely make any sense, but I think it's awesome. At least it's good that they don't just rap about money, hoes, and being a thug gangsta all the time. Some of my favorites are:
"Softly, as if I played piano in the dark"
"Cause I'm cooler than a polar bear's toenails..."
"Lend me some sugar... I am your neighbor!"
This weekend I realized that it's now been over 1 full year since I started working at this job. Last September/October was when I interviewed, got an offer, accepted, bought a car, got some new shirts/pants, and started working. It was also around this time when Oiy had her birthday thing at Tequila Roadhouse (Happy birthday to Stork too by the way, if I forgot to say it before). That happened to be the first time I met two cool friends in Nina and Vira, as well as being around the time when Nina and Greg first got together. I don't know if you guys had your exact anniversary yet, but congrats on making it through the first year. Anyways, I always get a weird feeling to remember what life was like exactly one year ago, and see how much stuff has changed in the time since then.
Tuesday, October 14, 2003
Thursday, October 09, 2003
Trimming the Alphabet
The more I think about it, our alphabet has too many letters. I think we should get rid of some of them, for simplicity's and efficiency's sake. Like, is it really necessary to have both a "C" and a "K"? They make the exact same sound, and could pretty much be interchangeable for 99% of the words in the English dictionary. Would anyone really care if they had to change the way they spelled "kangaroo" to "cangaroo"? I know I wouldn't. In the process, it might also serve as a nice push to all the Kathys and Cathys out there to start standardizing the spelling of their names. I'm fed up with trying to guess how to spell out your stupid name, so from now on, you're all gonna use "Cathy", got it?
Beyond eliminating the letter "K", I'd propose that we could probably just cut off the last few letters entirely. I mean, there's a reason they come last in the song, you know? Seriously, how many words really need "V", "X", "Y", or "Z" to survive? I'll admit, "W" is pretty cool sometimes, so I guess it can stay for now. But usually, you can replace any of those little guys with other letters or letter combinations and no one will even notice. Even if you can't, there are always ways around the problem. Can't figure out how to accomodate "Zebra"? Just make up a new word using the ample number of letters remaining in the pool, or better yet, how about just calling those things what they really are - "Striped Horses"? There's an idea to chew on.
A lot of you are probably reading and thinking, "this guy is out of his mind". Well, scoff if you want, but if I ever get to be President, you'll see these changes soon enough. Just think about how much time is being wasted by elementary school kids learning to write. If you could shave off just 5 letters out of 26, that's a savings of almost 20%, in terms of time spent tracing those stupid workbooks and learning the phonics that go with each letter. Factor in the additional time they spend learning cursive, or how much time they could save in the process of learning to type on a simplified keyboard, and these savings start to really pile up.
It's no secret that the United States has become a dominant superpower both economically and politically, and this is due in no small part to the relative simplicity of its alphabet dynamic. Consider the Chinese language, with over 30 sounds in its alphabet and multiplied by 4 intonations. What a disadvantage it must be have the burden of all these needlessly complex linguistics! Other countries, such as Germany or Spain, continue to carry foolhardy baggage in their respective languages in the form of umlauts and that little squiggly line over the "n". By comparison, the 26 basic sounds in English without any of that modifier nonsense is quite efficient already. But in today's ultra-competitive international market, Americans need as much of an edge on the rest of the world that they can get. And a simple way to stay ahead of the game is to tighten the reins on letter usage.
As it should be apparent by now, the benefits to downsizing our alphabet are both numerous and significant. Until I make it to the White House, though, we may be deprived of these changes while the rest of the world passes us by. In the meantime, I urge everyone out there to contact their local legislator and push for a smaller but better alphabet.
The more I think about it, our alphabet has too many letters. I think we should get rid of some of them, for simplicity's and efficiency's sake. Like, is it really necessary to have both a "C" and a "K"? They make the exact same sound, and could pretty much be interchangeable for 99% of the words in the English dictionary. Would anyone really care if they had to change the way they spelled "kangaroo" to "cangaroo"? I know I wouldn't. In the process, it might also serve as a nice push to all the Kathys and Cathys out there to start standardizing the spelling of their names. I'm fed up with trying to guess how to spell out your stupid name, so from now on, you're all gonna use "Cathy", got it?
Beyond eliminating the letter "K", I'd propose that we could probably just cut off the last few letters entirely. I mean, there's a reason they come last in the song, you know? Seriously, how many words really need "V", "X", "Y", or "Z" to survive? I'll admit, "W" is pretty cool sometimes, so I guess it can stay for now. But usually, you can replace any of those little guys with other letters or letter combinations and no one will even notice. Even if you can't, there are always ways around the problem. Can't figure out how to accomodate "Zebra"? Just make up a new word using the ample number of letters remaining in the pool, or better yet, how about just calling those things what they really are - "Striped Horses"? There's an idea to chew on.
A lot of you are probably reading and thinking, "this guy is out of his mind". Well, scoff if you want, but if I ever get to be President, you'll see these changes soon enough. Just think about how much time is being wasted by elementary school kids learning to write. If you could shave off just 5 letters out of 26, that's a savings of almost 20%, in terms of time spent tracing those stupid workbooks and learning the phonics that go with each letter. Factor in the additional time they spend learning cursive, or how much time they could save in the process of learning to type on a simplified keyboard, and these savings start to really pile up.
It's no secret that the United States has become a dominant superpower both economically and politically, and this is due in no small part to the relative simplicity of its alphabet dynamic. Consider the Chinese language, with over 30 sounds in its alphabet and multiplied by 4 intonations. What a disadvantage it must be have the burden of all these needlessly complex linguistics! Other countries, such as Germany or Spain, continue to carry foolhardy baggage in their respective languages in the form of umlauts and that little squiggly line over the "n". By comparison, the 26 basic sounds in English without any of that modifier nonsense is quite efficient already. But in today's ultra-competitive international market, Americans need as much of an edge on the rest of the world that they can get. And a simple way to stay ahead of the game is to tighten the reins on letter usage.
As it should be apparent by now, the benefits to downsizing our alphabet are both numerous and significant. Until I make it to the White House, though, we may be deprived of these changes while the rest of the world passes us by. In the meantime, I urge everyone out there to contact their local legislator and push for a smaller but better alphabet.
Wednesday, October 08, 2003
Notes
- Last Friday night I burned my tongue on some ramen. I don't think I've eaten any of that stuff since college, and the first time I give it another chance, it burns my tongue? That pissed me off so much. Anyone want 23 packs of original flavor Ichiban ramen? Cause I bought a whole box and now I don't know if I will be eating the rest. My tongue feels like sandpaper right now and it hurts like hell.
- A fact you may not know is that the typical human taste bud has a lifespan of 7-10 days. So I think instead of healing when they get burned or damaged or whatever, you just have to wait until the new ones take the place of the old. I guess that means that if my current taste buds happened to be "born" on Friday, I still might have another 3 or 4 days of sandpaper-tongue.
- One more sign that my body is getting older is that I can't handle as much second-hand smoke as I used to. I think in college, I breathed in enough smoke from the people I hung out with to account for about the equivalent of a pack of light cigarettes per day, and it never bothered me. But last night, I went to RAM to watch part of the Cubs game with some old friends, and in less than a couple hours of being exposed to their smoke I was sneezing, eyes sore, maybe even a little light headed.
- Speaking of the Cubs game, man, that is why playoff baseball is so awesome. Even though I'm kind of rooting for the Cubs, I'm still watching these games more as an overall "baseball fan", looking for exciting and well-played games. So even though they lost, I enjoyed watching a good battle. Some observations from that game:
1. That Sammy Sosa hop has gotten so ridiculous. I don't know if he does it because fans expect it, or if he just thinks it's fun or what, but it needs to stop.
2. Ugueth Urbina blows. I knew he was gonna give up that game-tying home run as soon as Sosa came up to bat with a man on base. Some pitchers have decent stuff, but they are just way too unclutch to be closers, and especially even more so in the playoffs. This list definitely includes Urbina, as well as people like Billy Koch, Byung-Hyun Kim, Armando Benitez, and Keith Foulke.
3. I don't think I've ever seen an outfield play worse defense than the Marlins in the early innings last night. And then, I saw Alex Gonzalez (of the Marlins) make two of the best defensive plays that might have saved the game in the late innings.
4. I don't think the Cubs have a lot to worry about, with Wood and Prior scheduled to pitch at least 4 games in this series.
5. Those 3 home runs in one inning, I couldn't believe it as it was happening.
- Red Sox vs. Yankees, I think I'm gonna root for the Yankees to win in 7. I kind of wanted to see a Cubs vs. Red Sox World Series, but when they kept showing those Boston fans in that bar during Game 5 of the Oakland series, I just started to really hate them for some reason. It's like a whole bunch of Ben Afflecks there, and I hate Ben Affleck.
- Although I must admit, Boston did produce my favorite Real World Paris character. Unfortunately, I missed last night's episode, but I'm looking forward to catching a rerun sometime soon so I can see drunk CT trying to fight everyone, and Adam looking scared.
- Last Friday night I burned my tongue on some ramen. I don't think I've eaten any of that stuff since college, and the first time I give it another chance, it burns my tongue? That pissed me off so much. Anyone want 23 packs of original flavor Ichiban ramen? Cause I bought a whole box and now I don't know if I will be eating the rest. My tongue feels like sandpaper right now and it hurts like hell.
- A fact you may not know is that the typical human taste bud has a lifespan of 7-10 days. So I think instead of healing when they get burned or damaged or whatever, you just have to wait until the new ones take the place of the old. I guess that means that if my current taste buds happened to be "born" on Friday, I still might have another 3 or 4 days of sandpaper-tongue.
- One more sign that my body is getting older is that I can't handle as much second-hand smoke as I used to. I think in college, I breathed in enough smoke from the people I hung out with to account for about the equivalent of a pack of light cigarettes per day, and it never bothered me. But last night, I went to RAM to watch part of the Cubs game with some old friends, and in less than a couple hours of being exposed to their smoke I was sneezing, eyes sore, maybe even a little light headed.
- Speaking of the Cubs game, man, that is why playoff baseball is so awesome. Even though I'm kind of rooting for the Cubs, I'm still watching these games more as an overall "baseball fan", looking for exciting and well-played games. So even though they lost, I enjoyed watching a good battle. Some observations from that game:
1. That Sammy Sosa hop has gotten so ridiculous. I don't know if he does it because fans expect it, or if he just thinks it's fun or what, but it needs to stop.
2. Ugueth Urbina blows. I knew he was gonna give up that game-tying home run as soon as Sosa came up to bat with a man on base. Some pitchers have decent stuff, but they are just way too unclutch to be closers, and especially even more so in the playoffs. This list definitely includes Urbina, as well as people like Billy Koch, Byung-Hyun Kim, Armando Benitez, and Keith Foulke.
3. I don't think I've ever seen an outfield play worse defense than the Marlins in the early innings last night. And then, I saw Alex Gonzalez (of the Marlins) make two of the best defensive plays that might have saved the game in the late innings.
4. I don't think the Cubs have a lot to worry about, with Wood and Prior scheduled to pitch at least 4 games in this series.
5. Those 3 home runs in one inning, I couldn't believe it as it was happening.
- Red Sox vs. Yankees, I think I'm gonna root for the Yankees to win in 7. I kind of wanted to see a Cubs vs. Red Sox World Series, but when they kept showing those Boston fans in that bar during Game 5 of the Oakland series, I just started to really hate them for some reason. It's like a whole bunch of Ben Afflecks there, and I hate Ben Affleck.
- Although I must admit, Boston did produce my favorite Real World Paris character. Unfortunately, I missed last night's episode, but I'm looking forward to catching a rerun sometime soon so I can see drunk CT trying to fight everyone, and Adam looking scared.
Monday, October 06, 2003
Template Issues
I've been having issues with my blog entries not showing up. I think it's something wrong with my template. I'll try to fix it later, but in the meantime, just try to ignore the stripped down look of my blog.
Cubs Talk
Congrats to the Cubs and Cubs fans on moving on to the NLCS. Now that the Braves and Twins are both out, I don't know who to root for anymore. The Chicagoan in me wants to cheer for the Cubs, but something about it still doesn't feel right. But anyways, I think right now I'm somewhere between "indifferent" and "mildly supporting" the Cubs.
Something I wonder about is, what happens if the Cubs actually do win the World Series? I think the world would be turned upside down. I mean, part of the charm of the Cubs is their image as "lovable losers". That's a huge credit to the geniuses at the Tribune Company for successfully marketing this team in the past 20 years or so. Somehow, they packaged an old, aging stadium, an inept, senile announcer, and a team that loses year after year, to gain fans not only in Chicago but around the country and sell out 81 home games a year.
By now, Cubs fans have gotten accustomed to, and even learned to embrace their team's perennial failures. Wouldn't it be so weird if the team suddenly became champions after 90-some years of futility? I mean, one day you are the polar opposite of an organization like the Yankees, a team built on a image of high prestige and consistent success. Next thing you know, you are on the same level, and maybe even considered a superior team to those same vaunted Yankees. I don't know if "anticlimatic" would be the right word, but something would definitely seem really backwards if that happened.
Then, what if after winning the World Series, the team goes back to its losing ways the next year? Will the phrase "when the Cubs win the World Series" go back to being synonymous with phrases like "when hell freezes over" or "when pigs fly"? What about the fans in the bleachers at Wrigley? Will they now be expecting and demanding their team to be competitive every year? Or would they just go right back to the old ways of drinking their beer, not paying attention to the game, and checking out girls? These are questions that truly fascinate me.
Playa University
While I was writing that blog, they were showing the player intros for Monday Night Football, where every guy says their own name and the college they graduated from. When Simeon Rice (Illini product) came up, he said "Simeon Rice, Playa University". Man, he was always a cocky biatch. But I guess if he's right, then I too am an alumni of Playa University. Maybe I should update my resume to reflect this change.
I've been having issues with my blog entries not showing up. I think it's something wrong with my template. I'll try to fix it later, but in the meantime, just try to ignore the stripped down look of my blog.
Cubs Talk
Congrats to the Cubs and Cubs fans on moving on to the NLCS. Now that the Braves and Twins are both out, I don't know who to root for anymore. The Chicagoan in me wants to cheer for the Cubs, but something about it still doesn't feel right. But anyways, I think right now I'm somewhere between "indifferent" and "mildly supporting" the Cubs.
Something I wonder about is, what happens if the Cubs actually do win the World Series? I think the world would be turned upside down. I mean, part of the charm of the Cubs is their image as "lovable losers". That's a huge credit to the geniuses at the Tribune Company for successfully marketing this team in the past 20 years or so. Somehow, they packaged an old, aging stadium, an inept, senile announcer, and a team that loses year after year, to gain fans not only in Chicago but around the country and sell out 81 home games a year.
By now, Cubs fans have gotten accustomed to, and even learned to embrace their team's perennial failures. Wouldn't it be so weird if the team suddenly became champions after 90-some years of futility? I mean, one day you are the polar opposite of an organization like the Yankees, a team built on a image of high prestige and consistent success. Next thing you know, you are on the same level, and maybe even considered a superior team to those same vaunted Yankees. I don't know if "anticlimatic" would be the right word, but something would definitely seem really backwards if that happened.
Then, what if after winning the World Series, the team goes back to its losing ways the next year? Will the phrase "when the Cubs win the World Series" go back to being synonymous with phrases like "when hell freezes over" or "when pigs fly"? What about the fans in the bleachers at Wrigley? Will they now be expecting and demanding their team to be competitive every year? Or would they just go right back to the old ways of drinking their beer, not paying attention to the game, and checking out girls? These are questions that truly fascinate me.
Playa University
While I was writing that blog, they were showing the player intros for Monday Night Football, where every guy says their own name and the college they graduated from. When Simeon Rice (Illini product) came up, he said "Simeon Rice, Playa University". Man, he was always a cocky biatch. But I guess if he's right, then I too am an alumni of Playa University. Maybe I should update my resume to reflect this change.
Thursday, October 02, 2003
For it's root, root root for the...?
So the Cubs/Braves series is tied 1-1. Even though I've always been a Sox fan, I would really like to root for the Cubs to win the World Series, having grown up in Chicago and all. Unfortunately, I think my opinion of this series is somewhere in between "indifferent" and "mildly anti-Cubs". There are a number of reasons for this:
1. Don't like Sammy Sosa. I never have. I hate that little hop he does after hitting a home run, I hate how fake and full of crap he is in interviews, I believe he uses steroids, and knowingly used his corked bat in the game.
2. I like the Braves. Not saying I'm a die-hard fan or anything, but they are probably the only non-Chicago baseball team I have followed from the very beginning of when I first started watching the sport. It's amazing how this team has changed throughout the years, but always finishes on top of their division, season after season. The team really deserves to be in a city that appreciates them more. I would be so ecstatic if they were in Chicago instead of Atlanta. The players are so good too. I wish I could root for true stars like Greg Maddux, Andruw Jones, Gary Sheffield, Chipper Jones, and more.
3. Cubs fans. The hardest part about rooting for the Cubs comes about because of the fans that like to talk trash when their team is finally doing well. In a way, I do understand that after years and years and years and years and years and years and years and years of losing and more losing, there is a lot of pent up frustration such that when the team actually wins, it is all let out in the form of unnecessary trash talking. I mean, I've been through a good number of bad experiences with the Sox, but when they start winning, you don't see me turning into a jackass all of a sudden and saying "Cubs suck" to everyone. Of course, not every Cubs fan is like that, and there are plenty of Sox fans who are not as mature as myself. But there's enough of the stupid Cubs fans out there to make me want to see their team lose so they will just shut up again.
Anyways, if the Cubs win, good for them. I'm not rooting heavily against them; more than anything else, I want to see good exciting playoff baseball games. Also, I think I might as well root for the Twins to go far, that way I won't feel so bad knowing that they owned the Sox in the last few weeks of the season.
So the Cubs/Braves series is tied 1-1. Even though I've always been a Sox fan, I would really like to root for the Cubs to win the World Series, having grown up in Chicago and all. Unfortunately, I think my opinion of this series is somewhere in between "indifferent" and "mildly anti-Cubs". There are a number of reasons for this:
1. Don't like Sammy Sosa. I never have. I hate that little hop he does after hitting a home run, I hate how fake and full of crap he is in interviews, I believe he uses steroids, and knowingly used his corked bat in the game.
2. I like the Braves. Not saying I'm a die-hard fan or anything, but they are probably the only non-Chicago baseball team I have followed from the very beginning of when I first started watching the sport. It's amazing how this team has changed throughout the years, but always finishes on top of their division, season after season. The team really deserves to be in a city that appreciates them more. I would be so ecstatic if they were in Chicago instead of Atlanta. The players are so good too. I wish I could root for true stars like Greg Maddux, Andruw Jones, Gary Sheffield, Chipper Jones, and more.
3. Cubs fans. The hardest part about rooting for the Cubs comes about because of the fans that like to talk trash when their team is finally doing well. In a way, I do understand that after years and years and years and years and years and years and years and years of losing and more losing, there is a lot of pent up frustration such that when the team actually wins, it is all let out in the form of unnecessary trash talking. I mean, I've been through a good number of bad experiences with the Sox, but when they start winning, you don't see me turning into a jackass all of a sudden and saying "Cubs suck" to everyone. Of course, not every Cubs fan is like that, and there are plenty of Sox fans who are not as mature as myself. But there's enough of the stupid Cubs fans out there to make me want to see their team lose so they will just shut up again.
Anyways, if the Cubs win, good for them. I'm not rooting heavily against them; more than anything else, I want to see good exciting playoff baseball games. Also, I think I might as well root for the Twins to go far, that way I won't feel so bad knowing that they owned the Sox in the last few weeks of the season.
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