It's the most wonderful time of the year... the week of Christmas. The only bad thing is that I have to be at the job for today and tomorrow. The bright side is, a lot of other people aren't around to annoy me. Traffic this morning was so light that my commute was cut by about 1/3 of the normal time, to 6 minutes. Here at work, everything is so quiet today. It's nice because the mood is so relaxed, the parking lot is emptier, and I know that it's gonna be a very short week. Zero days would have been nicer, but I'll take two.

Now would be a good time to send shout outs, much love, and props to all the hardworking people like myself, who are grinding it out today and tomorrow instead of relaxing at home. You guys are awesome!!

The main topic of my blog today is Lord of the Rings. For those of you who haven't seen the entire trilogy, skip the rest of this entry. But for those who have, maybe you can explain some of my questions about the movies. Sorry if any of these are supposed to be painfully obvious, or aren't even relevant. Maybe I'm just stupid, or slow, or I didn't pay good enough attention. Also, these are mostly based only on the parts of the trilogy that I watched in the past week, that is, the last 2/3 of the Fellowship and the first 1/2 of Two Towers on TV (Starz! was playing them a lot), and then the whole Return of the King in the theater. The rest of it, I watched a year ago and I forgot what happened. Maybe some of my answers lie in those parts too, and I should watch them again.

Lord of the Rings Questions

1. What is the significance of eagles in these movies? In the third one, they just show up out of nowhere and start taking out those "wraiths" (Starcraft word #1). I thought that was pretty random, but then I saw the first one on TV, and then an eagle saved Gandalf from that one tower when he was about to be porked by Saruman. So I guess there must be some story about why or where these eagles come from.

2. How did Gandalf the Gray become Gandalf the White? It's like he fought that demon thing, chilled on the side of the mountain for a bit, and then next thing you know, he comes back as a White Wizard. Also, are White Wizards cooler or stronger than Gray wizards? Was Saruman formerly a Gray wizard? Would Gandalf the Gray have been unable to drive out Saruman from the King of Rohan (Theodan?)?

3. Is there a relationship between the dead people army that took out the "corsairs" (Starcraft word #2) in the third movie, and the dead people in that swamp in the second one, when Frodo gets mesmerized and falls in? And why are those "bright lights" so mesmerizing anyways?

4. How come one minute Arwen (Liv Tyler) is about to die, and then at the end she's all of a sudden healthy and ready to hook up with Aragorn again?

5. Why did Frodo have to leave the Shire at the end and go with Gandalf?

6. How could Frodo and Sam make it through an entire trilogy of movies while continuing to deny all of their homoerotic feelings towards each other? There were at least 5 or 6 moments throughout the 10 hours of action, when I could have sworn they were leaning in for a passionate kiss. Yet instead of going in for the kill, they broke into a hug every time. So weak... And don't tell me it was a "brotherly love", I know a horny look when I see one. Oh also, in the ending when Sam married the girl in the braids, what a total sham! Completely not believable at all.

7. What exactly is Sauron? In the movies, he's just this huge eye, but then there was a flashback in the first movie where he was this warrior looking guy dressed in black when he got his finger chopped off by Aragorn's dad Arathorn (?) and lost his ring. So how did he become the eye?

8. Why is it Lord of the "Rings" (plural)? Are there other rings? If so, who made them, what do they do, and what happened to them?

9. Who was Cate Blanchett? For that matter, what was the point of meeting her and all her elf homies in that forest? Other than getting that glowing water, of course. And is her group of elves friends or relatives of Legolas's group of elves?

10. This isn't about the plot, but is the guy that plays Liv Tyler's elf dad (Hugo Weaving) in any movies as a character that talks normally? Every time he talked in Lord of the Rings, I couldn't help but think of him as Agent Smith in the Matrix movies. Mmmmmmiiiiisssster Aaaandersonnnn...

11. Is it actually true that "no man" can kill a wraith, but the princess of Rohan can because she's a woman? If so, how cheesy is that? Also, in the first movie when all the wraiths are surrounding Frodo on that mountain, and closing in, why do they run away from Aragorn? Are they afraid of fire? If so, then that is also cheesy.

12. Did anyone else feel like a lot of parts reminded them of certain parts in the original Star Wars movies? For example, the scene when Gandalf is hanging off the cliff, and Frodo watches him fall, that totally made me think of when Luke Skywalker watches Obi-wan Kenobi get killed by Darth Vader in the Death Star. Both in their horrified reaction as someone is holding them back, and also how the old guys just kind of smile and give up. When Gandalf falls off that one platform where Saruman is abusing him, and an eagle catches him, it's like when Luke falls from that post in Cloud City and the Millenium Falcon catches him. Saruman and Count Dooku are like the same character with the same role, they're even played by the same guy, Christopher Lee (I know Count Dooku wasn't in the originals, but still). The second movie in both trilogies starts with a scene in a snowy land. The Balrog in the cave is kind of like the Rancor in Jabba the Hutt's palace. Hobbits are kind of like Ewoks, not in looks, just how they're small and everyone underestimates them. The pale wrinkly face of the possessed king (Theodan?) is kind of like Darth Vader without his mask. Frodo getting his finger bitten off is kind of like Luke getting his hand cut off. And I could've sworn I heard the sound of TIE Fighter engines in one of the movies. I know, some of those are quite a reach, and I'm probably just too obsessed with Star Wars.

13. What race is Gollum/Smeagol?

14. When the army of dead people were fighting that battle in Return of the King, could any of them actually die? Was it basically just a no-lose situation for them against the Orcs? I wish I had an army of dead guys fighting for me.

Lunchables

Today, I had an awesome lunch. No, it wasn't a 18 oz. steak, a seafood/sushi buffet, or even Wendy's 99-cent Menu Salad and Chili. As you may have guessed from the title, I had Lunchables. Two, to be exact, one big box and one small.

Laugh at me if you want, but it was a pretty damn satisfying meal so I don't care (surprisingly filling, too). I know that I'm 23, almost 24 years old, but does that mean I can't enjoy some crackers, cheese, little round pieces of ham, and makeshift pepperoni pizzas once in a while? It even came with a chocolate frosting and M&M's to make a "dessert pizza", you can't say no to that! Tomorrow, I can't wait to enjoy the other boxes I bought, tacos and lean turkey with a mini-Butterfingers bar. OH BABY....

So I'm sure it must seem random, that I suddenly decided to go out and buy some Lunchables for myself, but wasn't completely out of the blue. Yesterday when I went to get my lunch from the fridge at work (it was just a plain sandwich with chips and OJ), I saw that someone else had brought a box of Lunchables. And that brought back a lot of memories of Lunchables, which eventually made me crave them to the point where I really had to get some.

Actually, I never really had these things when I was in elementary school, when most kids (ages 22 and under) get them. My mom decided that they were too expensive to get for me and my sister (which they are), so we got her homemade sandwiches and fruit instead. I guess I always envied the other kids who got Lunchables because they seemed so cool. All putting together the little pieces of food that came in a neat little package, while I struggled to finish my mushy banana, and had to fold up my paper lunch bag to bring home when I was done, so it could be reused for lunch the next day.

Well nowadays, I make my own lunch, and the funny thing is, I still end up bringing sandwiches and fruit every day, except now it's by choice. And I also find myself voluntarily saving and reusing my lunch bags, exactly like I hated so much to do back in those days. Funny how things work sometimes.

But anwyays, when I talk about "bringing back memories", a big part of it was that feeling of envying other people's Lunchables, and not so much about memories of how I got to enjoy them myself. Well, at least not as far as those elementary school days were concerned.

The time did come when I got to eat Lunchables and satisfy years of longing, and this time was college. (Again, I know this makes me sound like a major weirdo or a loser, but I'm assuming if you've managed to read this far in a blog about Lunchables, that means you're willing to look beyond these things). People who got to live with me or hang around with me a lot in college know that I was pretty dependent on packaged, ready to eat meals. Especially after getting sick of dorm food or all the specialty stuff like NRG, Rover, and Chomp-Ass. Throughout my 4 years living at school, I went through a wide variety of these ready-made foods, among them, Hot Pockets, Lean Cuisine, Bob Evans' frozen biscuits, and many kinds of Ramen. Looking back, I guess it was only a matter of time before Lunchables took its turn, and sure enough, one day as I was browsing the food section at Meijer, I saw them and thought, why not?

So for a while in my college days, Lunchables were a regular part of my life. They were even better when you could microwave it so the cheese on the pizza or taco was melted. I would've used the microwave here at work today, but I didn't want all my coworkers to know that I was a 23-year old Lunchables eating freak. Although, there must be at least one other Lunchables eater that uses the fridge here. But oh well, even when cold, they are still good.

Wow, I can't believe I wrote all that stuff about Lunchables in my blog. One day I'm writing this huge long thing on Starcraft strategy, and the next day it's these detailed thoughts and memories on Lunchables. I definitely need a vacation soon.

Starcraft Strategy Guide - How to Play Dudo~509~ Style

Seems like every few months, I'll suddenly start playing craft again for no reason, suck terribly, then as I finally start to shake off the rust and start to win like before, I'll forget about the game again. Then before I know it, another few months will have passed before the CD is used again. The cycle has been documented in this blog at least a couple times already.

I don't like repeating negative cycles, so this time I'm gonna try to write down what scattered bits of wisdom I've learned throughout years of playing the game. Hopefully it will help me retain my skills more, or recover them quicker, and maybe give me something to study the next time I try to make a Starcraft comeback. Nerdy, I know, but I don't care.

A lot of it is common sense, but some of my thoughts might still be useful to you guys too. Also, be aware that my record is something like 3-8 since getting back in the game last Friday, so a lot of this might be bad advice. But I think I'm losing more because of my poor execution and HACKERS, than because of bad fundamentals or strategy. Anyways, I'm making this as practical and up to date as I can, for what it's worth, but anyone out there is welcome to point out possible additions/revisions as they see fit.

*Protoss*

- As long as you don't get rushed, the first priority should be to get Dark Templars. Even if your opponents build cannons/spores/turrets early, they are still good for defending your own base, helping your partners, or picking off guys wandering around the map. Also, it's not as obvious to maphackers as to where you are and what you're doing. Don't go overboard with DT's though. Once you have more than 8-12, the other team usually has enough detection and you're much better off with straight up Zealots/Dragoons or Carriers. Also, make sure you get some cannons at your own base, to defend against counter attacks. You just need a few to hold off the attackers, while your Gateways are pumping out more DTs.

- If you're DT rushing against Zerg, get a few corsairs before you go, to chase/kill the overlords. You don't need 12, just 3 or 4 is good and keep sending more as you build them. This does delay your attack a little bit, but you have to wait for your corsairs against Zerg or else it won't work. Usually the DT/corsair is most effective if 1) You're fast and 2) The guy doesn't know it's coming. Otherwise, just one spore colony, or a bunch of hydralisks will foil you. When you go, send the corsairs in first - this way you know what the base looks like, and you have a headstart on killing the overlords. Then, I would kill the sunken colonies quickly with the DT's (assuming he doesn't have a ton of them, otherwise just ignore them all completely), and start wiping out the drones before killing the hatchery. You gotta keep building stuff at your base, but stay very vigilant with your corsairs to kill any new overlords that pop out. In DT/Corsair rushes, it's usually more worthwhile to focus on managing your attack, than spend all your attention rebuilding at your base.

- If you DT rush against Terran, kill the scanner first as well as any turrets. Then kill as many SCVs as you can, while watching for any building turrets. If you see a turret being built, first kill the SCV building it and then finish the partially-built turret itself (you just need one, at most two DT's to do this, use the rest to keep killing SCV's). As long as you are killing a lot of his SCVs, you should eventually switch to building Zealots/Dragoons, because they are better to finish his base off with.

- If you DT rush against Protoss, give up if he has cannons around the nexus. Otherwise, walk past any other cannons and kill his probes. Then target his Nexus and kill that, before you go after anything else.

- Make sure you get observers somewhere along the way and upgrade their speed (slow observers are almost useless).

- One more benefit from having DT's is late in the game, you can merge them into Dark Archons and research Mind Control. Usually people like using that upgrade to get other races, but that's kind of overrated in the practical use department. I think it's the most effectively used when you have 4-6 DA's, a few carriers, and the other team attacks you with BC's or Carriers. I like to mind control their BC's or Carriers while they're battling, have them join my Carriers to kill the rest of his fleet, and then counter attack with them. Not only does it usually work the way you want it to, it has the "kick in the balls" factor and about 90% of the time when I've actually used this strategy, I've found that the other guy is so demoralized or pissed that he leaves the game right there and then. I encourage everyone to try it, but make sure to give them time to charge up, and make sure you have some carriers of your own to start with. Don't just go overboard and get 12 Dark Archons, expecting them to mind control a whole group of carriers for you, this is too much of a gamble and fails more often than not.

- Instead of DT's, you could also go straight up Zealot/Dragoon rush from the beginning, but you better be noticeably quicker and more efficient than the other guys. Unlike DTs, you do want to go overboard here as much as possible. In this case you should have at least 3 gateways pumping guys out (keep building more gateways if you have enough minerals coming in), and as long as you are breaking through their defense, keep building and sending during your attack. As far as upgrades go, if you're rushing, it's better to have more guys in the beginning than an upgraded few. But once you get beyond 12 guys or so, it's definitely better to have the Dragoon range or Zealot speed upgrades. I usually start researching them when I have about 8 of either one (and 2 or 3 gateways). Anyways, I don't like the straight up rush because it leaves your own base too open to counter attacks in the beginning, and it's harder to pull off a successful attack in 3v3 games because their partners can help them out. I usually only go this route later in the game, and in those situations, it's much more important to expand and have more than one base so you can outproduce them.

- As long as my partners are doing fine, I like to get carriers in the mid-late stages. I think upgrades (capacity, attack strength, and shields) are much more important than for ground troops, and I'll usually wait until I have 6 filled carriers to attack. As long as you have enough minerals and gas, get at least 3 or 4 Stargates, if not more, and shield batteries are also very helpful when you have carriers.

*Zerg*

- My early strategy with Zerg is a lot like Protoss, except with lurkers instead of DT's. Use them to attack the bases that are vulnerable without detectors, as defense for your own base, or to help your partners. It's not as good for helping partners as DT's because of the splash damage, so if you can choose between helping or countering, I'd prefer to just counter with your lurkers and just tell your partner to escape.

- If you are playing against a Protoss with Corsairs, you should definitely build more than one spore colony in your base. Also, it's a good idea to get some Devourers to protect your overlords when you attack. Mutalisks alone get fried by Corsairs, and hydralisks aren't as reliable for protecting overlords, especially when they're also being distracted by fighting the ground troops.

- Lurkers are still good even when they get detectors, but then you should mix them in with a lot of hydras. It's fine to attack with lurkers/hydras straight up if you have a lot, but dropping a few of them near the guy's minerals is even better. Usually, lurker dropping is good to set up a follow-up frontal attack, you shouldn't make it your whole strategy.

- A good use for lurkers that is often overlooked is to defend tank drops. Burrow them near the ledges where people do tank drops, and their attacks do actually reach the tanks as long as you have an overlord to see there.

- Get a lot of hatcheries. Since you can pop out a lot of guys at once with Zerg, it's not as important to be constantly building up your army, as it is to have a lot of hatcheries ready and enough minerals/gas to make them when they're needed. Also, make your base flexible and versatile as you get into the later stages of the game. That means, even if you went ground early on, get a spire sometime along the way so you can build air if it's needed. If you went straight zerglings, make sure you still have the capability to get hydras and ultras, with the upgrades.

- Get defilers. They are probably the most valuable zerg unit in my opinion. Put a cloud over your lurkers, hydras, and zerglings, and they become at least twice as powerful, both in attacking and defending. Plague on buildings or air units is also very fun, while having the "kick in the balls" factor to boot. The first upgrade on defilers should be consume, and the food with the best value for defilers is zerglings.

- Instead of getting 12 Devourers, all you really need is about 3 Devourers, and the rest should be Mutalisks. Based on the way their spores work, and how slow their attack rate is, the most effective method of using them is to splash as many spores as possible on the group, and let the Mutalisks (or Hydras) take over for the rest.

- Timing is everything when you're building up Zerg, and when you can get everything to finish one after the other, that's when you know you're on your game. Some timing knowledge that I can think of right now:

1) If you start building a Hydralisk den when the Lair is almost halfway done, you'll be ready to do the Lurker upgrade when the Lair pops up.

2) If you start the speed upgrade for zerglings a little bit after you start morphing to a Hive, you'll be ready to do the adrenal upgrade once the Hive pops up.

3) I think the same goes for morphing a Spire, but usually I start it simultaneously with the Hive, and then it's ready to be morphed into a Greater Spire when the Hive pops up.

- If you only have one Lair, upgrade Overlord speed first, then dropship capability. If you really want to be fast, get two Lairs and start the dropship upgrade a little bit before the speed upgrade. This way, they will finish researching at about the same time and you can load up and go right away.

*Terran*

- It takes the most patience and discipline to play with Terran. Your guys are so weak, so they suck completely unless you have a lot of them together. That means you can't really ever rush with them, and you can't help your partners early in the game.

- Always build at least one bunker in your base for defense. Maybe it seems like a waste of money or you think it slows you down, but more than a few times, I've found that it was the difference between a good game and a crappy game. The crappy game being one where 6 zerglings or 2 zealots take out your base in the very beginning, your partners waste all their guys and attention trying to save you, and you end up losing your base and having to float your buildings around the whole time anyways. The good game being one in which you manage to put together a solid base and actually have a chance to build up enough guys for launching attacks. When you have a bunker, even when you get attacked, you can tell your teammates to counter while you repair and hold off the other team. Like I said, you're not really going to pull off too many effective rushes with Terran, so to me, there's no point in saving the money of a Bunker when the risks of not having one are so huge. Bunkers should be surrounded by buildings (usually at least a Barracks on one side and supply depot on another side), filled with either 2 Marines/2 Firebats or 3 Marines/1 Firebat, and when attacked, you need to get as many SCV's repairing it as you can.

- Once you get tanks, have at least 2 tanks sieged to defend your base along with the bunker. The exception might be if you are attacking early, bring your tanks with your marines if you have nothing else. But other than that, you need at least 2 tanks for an effective D.

- I like to have at least 1 group of 12 marines/firebats with 6 medics before using them. 12 marines straight up is fine, but mix in 2-4 firebats and it's obviously much better against zealots or zerglings. As with upgrading the Protoss guys, I wouldn't rush to upgrade them until I have at least a few guys built. But the range and stimpak upgrades are crucial if you eventually want to use these guys to attack effectively.

- If you just upgrade the armor 1 level for marines at the engineering bay, they become much stronger in the early game. It then takes a non-upgraded Dark Templar 2 hits instead of 1 to kill you, and it takes 3 hits instead of 2 for a cannon or sunken to kill you. That means your guys last one and a half times to twice as long as normal, which means they get in that many more hits before they die. Of course, it's still better to have more marines than a few upgraded ones, and once the DT's are upgraded, then you're screwed again. But I think this can still be useful sometimes, if you're deciding whether to upgrade armor or attack first.

- Work with your team more when you're Terran. It's a lot harder to pull off a good attack by yourself, than if you have some zealots or hydras leading the way. Also, be diligent to scan for your partners when they need it, and if you can, help them out with some tanks to defend their bases.

- Even with medics, marines are horrible against Guardians, Carriers, and burrowed lurkers. It's almost pointless to try using them against those units, you gotta get some Goliaths and tanks to really stand a chance.

- Build Science Vessels and upgrade them according to who you're fighting (Irradiate against Zerg, EMP otherwise). It's almost always worthwhile to have at least 2-3 Science Vessels doing the little stuff. One of my favorite things to do in the game is get 3 or 4 SV's, have them irradiate each other, and fly through zerg stuff that has no air defense. Good targets for this strategy are unescorted Guardians, groups of zerglings, and the clump of drones at the minerals.

- In the middle stages of the game, my choices are either between attacking straight up, or dropping. In both cases, I'm going with ground troops, but when you drop, goliaths aren't as useful. By the way, I think it's pointless to do a drop with any less than 3 full dropships. You should bring at least 2 tanks, preferably 3 or 4, and the 12 Marine/Firebat - 6 Medic combo for it to be a good drop. But of course, don't go overboard and wait until you have enough guys to fill 10 dropships. By that time, if you haven't died already, your partners might have, and the other guys are probably all built up enough to withstand your drops.

- In the late stages of the game, it helps a lot to expand, if not for minerals, then at least for space to put all your buildings. I usually end up with a ton of resources, and that leads to me getting about 8-10 barracks to use it all up. Battlecruisers are good, especially if they are upgraded (I'm talking about shields and attacks, not so much for Yamato, but you might as well go ahead and get Yamato anyways), and you have Science Vessels with them to Defense Matrix and stuff. But don't stop building ground stuff even if you get BC's. Keep your marines, medics, tanks, and goliaths coming, you should have enough money for all of that stuff and more by that point of the game.

*General*

- Spot trends on Battle.net, because Battle.net is very trendy. If you start getting tank dropped every single game, then you better start building defense for it. If you get rushed every game, then don't go greedy early in the game. If a lot of people are building Carriers and advanced stuff, then start ground rushing them more. Don't be stubborn, and you have to keep adjusting to what people are doing. It's as simple as that.

- Kill probes when you attack. There are a few exceptions, but it doesn't help you at all in the long term to kill buildings. Of course, this doesn't mean you ignore everything else, but if you can potentially kill enough probes by walking past some stuff and taking some hits, then do it. It's pointless to waste time and guys fighting stuff out front, when the guy is just gonna rebuild as fast as you. But if you can stunt the guy's mining, then it makes it that much easier to finish him off in the next wave of attack. For the same reason, dropping is most effective when you do it near the guy's minerals and kill as many probes as possible. And it's also why it's important to build enough defense near your own minerals.

- If you escape, save as many probes as you can, and cancel anything that's building. That's the single most important key to rebuilding, saving probes and conserving minerals. Just let your fighters die trying to distract the attackers while you sneak the probes out, otherwise you're porked anyways. Also, if you have to leech off a partner's base, try to get yourself into your own base or your partner's expansion as fast as you can. When both of you are mining the same spot at the same time, even when it's BGH, it slows down both of you guys, and the team is almost better off if you just build a pylon in the corner or something.

- Rally points are useful and often times it's almost a necessity, but make sure you aren't screwing yourself by having your newly built guys run through attackers when the enemy is in your base. To clear a rally point setting, I just set the building's rally point back to itself and that seems to work.

- CTRL-click does the same as double clicking. I use it when there's a lot of confusion on the board, such as selecting 12 larva to build guys, or finding your DT's among a moving bunch of ground troops.

- If you have ally chat on, pressing Shift-Enter instead of just Enter will send message to all. Not that useful, but thought I'd make a note of it.

- Unless you are very comfortable with your skills of "micromanagement", just attack-move with your ground battles instead of targeting stuff. This is especially true for zealots, zerglings, etc. but still holds for range attack units like dragoons, hydras, marines for most cases. Usually your guys are smart enough to go after the right thing, whether it's enemy units or cannons/sunkens/bunkers/etc. Only when I feel like I'm at the very top of my game, do I ever try to micromanage. That's a rare situation for me and even when I feel like I'm flowing, I do it pretty minimally.

Welcome T-Mobile

I officially made the switch to T-Mobile over the weekend, leaving behind about 6000-7000 minutes worth that have rolled over in the past year on my Cingular account. So far, I am much more impressed with T-mobile's people than Cingular. The guy helping us was knowledgeable and answered most of my questions, which I had a lot of. Also, he gave me a free month of unlimited internet on my phone, and gave me and my sister each a $25 gift certificate for anywhere in Oakbrook (Jokebrook) Mall, which was nice.

Still, being the sentimental person I am, it was hard to say goodbye to the past 2 and a half years of being with Cingular. One thing I always think of is when I used to drive back to Champaign, and watching for my phone's display to change from "Cingular Roam" to "Cingular", so I could call Olivia and talk to her the rest of the way without racking up a lot of charges. Usually, it would change pretty much right at the sign for "Champaign County" on I-57.

The switch also means I have to retire my old Nokia 8260 and replace it with the slightly longer, but lighter and thinner 6610. The 6610 is newer, has a lot more features, including color screen and polyphonic ringtones, but I'll still always fondly remember the bright blue LED's of my 8260 and its simple ghetto monophonic (?) Britney Spears ringtone.

By the way, if anyone has any links to good sites for ringtones, hook a Chinese guy up. My sister showed me one that had "You Drive Me Crazy", and it sounded good on the site. But when I eventually downloaded it to my phone, it sounded choppy and messed up. So I'm still looking for a good one.

*****

Happy Birthday to Dennis, who turns 24 on this day.

*****

Another highlight of the weekend was playing craft with P and Anuj. Even though we sucked, the tradition must continue. Feel free to join us, even better if you want to play with an Illini name (brown11 and smith45 are taken).

*****

Oh yeah, yay for catching Saddam Hussein. Howard Dean has been pissing me off. It's stupid when your political campaign's success hinges on the continuation of American troops getting screwed in Iraq and us not finding Saddam. Anyways, hopefully Bin Laden will be next.

Weekday Recap

Monday: I watched the Average Joe Schmoe Millionaire Show Finale. I have to say, I was more than a little surprised when she picked the "hot" guy Jason over the "average" guy Adam (yes I know their names and yes I watched the whole season). I mean, even if she doesn't like Adam that much and isn't attracted to him, Jason had about zero personality. Here is her chance to prove to the country, on behalf of all women, that they mean it when they say "looks don't matter", and she blew it. As if a beautiful girl like her couldn't get any random cookie cutter baby faced guy ("Joe Pretty Boy", if you will) after the show anyways? Anyways, the difference between guys and girls is, most guys are at least honest about where they're shallow. No, the #1 thing we look for is not a girl's "sense of humor" or "emotional sensitivity". Oh and by the way, another difference is we also don't care how much money the girl makes.

Tuesday: Watched the Illini take a 6 point lead into the half against Providence. So far, so good. Drove to Dave's, stopped for gas along the way, and by the time I get there, they're down 15. SWEET. Guess we can't handle this crazy thing they call "zone defense". Oh well.... hopefully by the end of the season our young sophomores will have matured into the solid ballers I know they can be. Later that night, I got to know Greg and Rich quite well when we played for an hour or two as the final 3 in hold'em. We went back and forth for so long that at the end, everyone left, and even Dave said good night and went to bed. Also, we determined that "two-pair" is not as strong as it seems.

Wednesday: Everything was going fine until about 11 am, I was just harmlessly sitting at my desk here at work, when I got attacked by a huge wave of coldness. Literally, all of a sudden I just started shaking and shivering out of control, and it was so bad that I just had to log off my computer and go home. Where I proceeded to wrap myself in my blanket and fall asleep for 2 hours. At which point I woke up with this massive headache. Then I fell asleep for another 4 hours and woke up with the headache still there. Then I watched TV for a while and fell asleep until the next morning. When I woke up, the headache was mostly gone and I went back to work feeling almost normal. Weird, I still don't know what it was. The flu usually lasts more than a day, and it wasn't food poisoning cause I wasn't throwing up or anything. Maybe it was detox effects from my recreational heroin use. Just kidding, I don't do drugs. So yeah, I really have no idea what my 1-day headache/shivering thing was all about.

Thursday: Worked till about 7 to catch up on the time I missed the day before. I know with all the people who work crappy hours that read my blog, I shouldn't complain about this, but I'm still gonna say, it sucks. Especially when you're still kind of recovering from being crazy sick and scrambling the whole time to catch up on stuff. I haven't worked any overtime for a while now, and I forgot how much it sucks when it's so dead quiet at night, all the lights in the hallway are off, and the parking lot is empty by the time you leave. Although, I usually do get a lot more work done when everyone else is gone for some reason.

Also watched some TV at night. HBO was showing this Bill Maher standup comedy thing. As expected, it was mostly political, and his views are mostly too liberal and cynical for my taste, but he can still be a funny guy at times. My favorite part was when he was talking about how girls dress so slutty these days: "You know who I really feel sorry for? Whores. Because when you're a whore, what can you really wear anymore, so that people know you're a whore? It's like 'No see, I'm actually a prostitute... I'm charging for this ass'" hahahaha

A less positive TV experience was the Ozzy Christmas special on MTV. I never was huge into the Osbournes stuff, but some of it was funny at times, and for the special yesterday, I caught the tail end of the intro when Britney Spears was in Ozzy's dream so I stopped on the channel. Then it started listing the guests of who was gonna be on the special, and Britney Spears was listed, so I decided to watch the whole hour so I could see her. About 58 minutes later, I realized that the only Britney Spears part was the intro, of which I only saw like the last 3 seconds of. What made me madder is that the rest of the show was really crappy. At least half of the stuff they show of Ozzy being stupid is so obviously staged, and no, I'm not talking about the skits. At some point it's like, OK, we get it, the dad has a completely fried brain, the kids are spoiled, and they are all proficient users in the various forms of the F-word. Now get off the TV and stop wasting my time.

Friday: I'm in love.... Actually, I have no plans for the evening. Call me if you wanna do anything.

*****

One more thing I wanted to talk about, all we are hearing during the baseball offseason is Red Sox this, Yankees that. I hate both teams and I'm so sick of everything being centered around Boston and New York. Great, so you guys have money to throw around. I hope both teams choke horribly in 2004 and get owned by a small market team and/or the White Sox. Oh, and I'm also happy we signed Mark Buerhle. Now can we please get a good leadoff hitter or something? Cause that's what I think teams really need in order to win, more so than Gary Sheffield or Vlads or Pudge or whoever else is getting all the attention.

Thoughts

- Over the weekend I got to go to a birthday party for a 4-year old. Don't ask me why I was at 4-year old's birthday party, but hey, it was fun. They had a magician and everything. He did a bunch of cool tricks, brought a real rabbit for the kids to pet, and made balloon airplanes, dinosaurs, and Little Mermaids at the end. The only bad part is, I didn't get a bag of party favors at the end. I kept wishing I was 4 again. But I think for my 24th birthday, I'm gonna have to get a magician too. Then I'm inviting all you guys to my birthday party so you can get me awesome gifts like sparkle lotion and books about horses.

- My week and a half break for Christmas/New Years is still a couple weeks away, but even before I get to enjoy it, I'm already worrying about how much it's gonna suck to go back to work after it's over. Mondays are already enough of a pain after a 2-day weekend, that I can't shake the feeling of how miserable a Monday after a 12-day break is gonna be. I've figured out that the problem isn't really because working sucks that much, it's more because "not working" is just that awesome. By now, I'm pretty much used to working Monday through Friday, and I think my job is pretty good overall. But obviously when you compare it to weekends, holidays, or vacations, of course it's gonna suck. Anyways, I should probably stop thinking so far ahead, it's gonna prevent me from enjoying my break in the first place.

- When I signed up for a cell phone plan, it was supposed to be for $39.99/month. But every month, I end up paying about $47-48 on my bill. The thing is, I don't ever go over on my minutes, and I don't use any of the optional services like downloading ringtones and stuff. This month, it reached a new high of about $49, which is just getting ridiculous. So I finally decided to look up my account info online and confirmed what I already knew, my monthly charges are supposed to be $39.99. The problem is, they tack on all these other charges in the form of fancy names so I don't know what they are. Basically, what it comes down to is that I'm paying about 8-10 bucks worth of "Taxes, Surcharges, or Assessments" and "Other Charges and Credits".

Also, as I was digging through the Cingular website and stumbled some fine print about a "Regulatory Cost Recovery Fee" which is supposed to "help defray costs incurred in complying with obligations and charges imposed by State and Federal telecom regulation". I'm taking this to mean that it all has something to do with the new law that forces wireless companies to let you keep your phone numbers, but I could be wrong. Now, hopefully this is only something that applies to new customers, but if I find out that I'm being charged this fee, even without switching companies, I'm definitely out the door. No hesitation whatsoever to leave this 2 and a half year relationship behind.

When will all these little fees and charges and assessments end? I'm tired of all this stuff adding up on my bill. As if I don't get "nickel and dimed to death" enough from playing Dave Chan in poker....

- The other day I saw this commercial for "Hip Hop Barbies". Hmmm... what's wrong with that picture? Now, I don't remember their names, but they were like "Tisha", "K.K. Lulu", or "Z-mo". It was pretty ridiculous, especially cause they all still have the smiling, big blue eyed Barbie face, just wearing hip hop clothes and their hair in braids. At least replace some of her pearly white teeth with gold fillings or something.

- There was also another Barbie commercial where they were casting spells and mixing up witches brew. Now that kind of stuff just really bothers me. If people don't want to believe in God, that's one thing, but is it really necessary to be promoting Satan by making something like witchcraft into a kids toy? I mean, Satanism is probably one of the last things you should ever want to mess with. But for some reason, our culture seems to think the subject is "cool" or "funny", I don't know what it is. With all due respect to the Harry Potter fans out there, I think it's horrible that the top selling books for children today feature a hero that is a witch. Can't we think of any other good subjects to write about? I also don't like the fact that so many TV shows and movies have these kinds of themes, as if Satan was just another genre of entertainment. I don't even understand why so many sports teams like to have mascots such as "Blue Demons" or "Red Devils". Now, I don't think I'm an extreme conservative when it comes to religion, but I definitely don't think this kind of stuff should ever be taken lightly. Or, maybe this does make me a conservative?

I-L-L...

So the Illini lost last night to UNC. At the time I was watching, it was infuriating that they couldn't grab a forking rebound. But by now, I'm over it already. It was close enough down to the end, where it could have gone either way, and on the road against a good team, you probably don't expect to win them all. Overall, I think this team is gonna have a great year. I don't think it matters a whole lot that they lose this early in the season, it's better than being overconfident and playing too cocky for their own good later on.

Anyways, watching the game made me think about the experiences in college when we "normal" college students had random encounters with the basketball players. I don't have a lot of stories myself, but between all the people I know, there's a good amount of stuff to list:

- My sister had some class with Nick Smith, and she says he just sits in the corner and nobody ever talks to him. Poor guy. Also, there's the the time when she met Dee Brown at the Union (I posted a picture of this a few weeks ago). According to her, he was very quiet and polite.

- Rod had class with a bunch of the players throughout his college years, and probably the most contact with them out of all of us. I think he said Lucas Johnson was a clown in his Rhet 105 class. And I vaguely remember some story about Marcus Griffin randomly asking him on the street if he knew where to get some weed.

- I don't think I ever had class with any of the basketball players. The closest thing would be when me and P took summer school, and there were these two girls basketball players in our Leisure Studies 100 class. As for the guys, the most that ever happened was near the end of that same summer, when a bunch of them showed up at Kam's. On my way to the bathroom, I bumped into Frankie Williams and I was like "sup man, thanks for staying one more year", and then shook his hand. I wanted to berate him for costing us all those games with his wild shooting when he was a freshman, but he seemed like a nice guy so I didn't. Also, he made up for it with lots of good plays later on so I guess it's all good.

- Other reports include: Damir Krupalija was a ladies man, and Luther Head is dumb as rocks. I'm sure there's other stuff I'm forgetting, but I can't think right now.

One of my favorite memories is of freshman year, when we would "finger" the players on UNIX. We knew all their account names from PH-ing them, like "ldjohnson" or "rarchiba". We'd usually find them logged on at CRH or IMPE, and Chras or P would send them a banner message like "FINAL FOUR 2000" or something. Yes, all of this borders on stalking, but it was fun. Too bad they changed the UNIX accounts to not accept those after freshman year. Maybe it was because of people like us?

These stories are all the kind of reasons why college basketball is so much more entertaining and meaningful to me than pro ball. As a sport, I don't really think basketball is that fun to watch compared to baseball or football. It's like you play 3.5 quarters which don't really matter that much, and then it just comes down to a couple bounces of the ball either way, or a couple critical calls by the ref and free throw shooting in the end. Especially after the Bulls dynasty ended, and the NBA started being filled with all these cocky 19 year olds, I really lost interest in that league. But then when you can watch the Illini on TV or live at the stadium, and be able to identify with the individual players like "hey, I go to school with these guys" and have stories that relate to them as ordinary people, it's that much better.

Go Illini... and please try not to steal any more PS2's, guys.

My Bits and Pieces

- The first time I heard the phrase "Rolling Ghettos" to describe the town where I work, I thought it was just a joke. I always figured that the northwest suburbs were all nice, otherwise why would Walter Payton live around here? But, now after about a year, I am starting to see that the area actually is kind of ghetto. It's the only area outside of the city where someone has ever come up to my car at a stoplight, tap on my window, and ask for money (by the way, the guy was not wearing a yellow vest that said "Help retarded kids"). Also, yesterday I saw someone hitchhiking for the first time in my life, about a block away from the NG building. Maybe hitchhiking isn't that ghetto, but I honestly didn't know people really did that, outside of movies and books, or on dirt roads in the countryside. So it seemed ghetto to me. Anyways, hopefully Rolling Ghettos is the exception, not the rule around here. P-tine must be where all the action is at.

- I think one of my useless talents is identifying where scrub actors/actresses are from. You know how all these sitcoms, commercials, and movies recycle the same pool of scrubs for the minor characters? I'm pretty good at seeing a face on screen and immediately being able to say "hey, that guy was Chandler's crazy roommate in that one episode of Friends", or "that's the kid from The Sandlot". Hmmm.... yeah, I don't know if my talents get any less useful than that.

- Illini basketball plays their first big game of the season tonight against UNC. I haven't watched any of their games yet this year, but tonight will probably officially kick off the next 4-5 months of Illini madness in my life. By the way, there's a Illini vs. UIC game on Dec. 30th at the United Center. I know from talking to a few people that we could get at least 5 or 6 of us to go, anyone interested, let me know soon and maybe I'll try to get tickets and organize something for that game. For reference, prices are as follows: $40 per 100-level seat, $30 per 200-level seat, and $25 per 300-level seat (I don't think UIC students get discounts for this game). I'm not sure what's still available, but if you want to go, also tell me how much you would be willing to pay, so I know what to get.

- "An apple a day keeps the doctor away". We'll see if this old saying is true. Starting this week, my latest addition to "Joe's daily routine" is a morning fruit break. Since oranges and bananas spoil too fast, and I'm too lazy to go to Jewel all the time to buy more fruit, my fruit breaks will mostly be apples.

Thanksgiving Weekend Recap

- As usual, the Chens did not have any turkey on Thanksgiving. Instead, we enjoyed hot pot. I don't feel like explaining what hot pot is again, so for those who don't know, refer to last Thanksgiving's entry.

- Played mah-johng with grandparents and lost all my money. I honestly don't know what I can do to play the game better, but I always lose to them for some reason. It can't all be bad luck. Oh well, at least I got a t-shirt once for winning a TASC mah-jonhg tournament. It was way back in freshman year of college, but still.

- In my last week of teaching Sunday School for a while, the kids listed things they were thankful for. Most just said they were thankful for their family and friends, as expected. But some of the more interesting ones said they were thankful for "being a boy", "my video game called Crash Team Racing", "my cell phone", and "fish". I think when I was their age, I was most thankful for my Topps 1990 Frank Thomas rookie card, worth $4.50 at the time.

- Did not do any shopping, Christmas or otherwise.

- Did not go out at all, even on the "second-biggest party night of the year".

- Watched "Elf". A good movie, especially if you like Christmas.

- Watched "Home Alone" again on TV. That movie never gets old.

- Had a miserable fantasy football experience. Starters score 2 TDs, bench scores 6. This was not helped by Jeremy Shockey being a cackmaster and Bubba Franks rubbing it in my face for starting the cackmaster over him.

- Played the usual Sunday night cards, came out about even. As always, it was a nice and chill way to finish off the weekend, which, despite having twice as many days, still wasn't long enough for my liking.

Hold'em Hand Of The Day
Hand #1 - Me And My Two Low Pairs

As part of an ongoing effort to improve my decision making instincts in hold'em, I thought it might be a good idea to keep a log of certain hands on this blog. Maybe any of my poker genuis readers out there can provide their input on what should have been done, what they would've done, etc.

The following was the last big hand I played:

I was dealt 5-7 suited (hearts) on the big blind ($1), with 4 people left in the game and about $25 in my stack. The guy after me folds, then dealer calls the blind, and small blind also calls (I think). I check with my 5-7, half-wishing that someone had raised so I could fold.

But no one did, and the flop came with J-5-7 with a flush draw on the board (2 clubs). I bet out $2 with my two-pair (5's and 7's), and then I'm raised by the dealer, making it $3 more. Other guy folds, so it's up to me.

I think about what the dealer could possibly have on this board, knowing that he is a pretty loose player who likes to buy pots, and figure at best, he paired a J. So, I raise his $3 for another $10, expecting him to fold.

He calls my bet, and the next card on the turn is a club (I think it was an 8). Now if he has suited clubs, he has a flush. I'm still pretty sure that my 2-pairs are the best hand, but since he called my $10 raise last round, I decide to just check now. Then he puts me all-in (he has by far the most chips at the table, at least $60-70, while I have about $10 left).

I think about it for a while, but to me, the decision to call this last bet is pretty simple. The way I see it, there are only three possible hands he could beat me with:

1. He might have flopped a three-of-a-kind on the flop with pocket 5's, 7's, or J's. This was highly unlikely because I already had one each of the remaining 5's and 7's in my hand, and if he had pocket J's, I'm almost positive that he would raise with it on pre-flop.

2. He might have a flush with clubs. This was also unlikely in my mind because that means he put $13 in the pot on the flop with just a flush draw.

3. He might have paired that jack on the flop, then made the 2nd pair with the turn card. This was the most likely possibility of the three.

On the other hand, I knew that he was a loose player, and especially with the most money on the table, he was more likely to make reckless bets. I've seen him go all in with absolutely nothing at the worst situations in the past, and now I figure he's just too involved in the pot that he's desperate to try and buy it at this point by going all-in. My best guess, as I call his all-in for my last $10 or so, puts him on one of the following hands that I can beat:

1. Pair of Jacks, high kicker. This was the most likely situation, based on what kind of player I think he is.

2. Pocket Aces, K's, or Q's. This means he was playing them slow from the beginning to try and trap me, and if this were the case, now was my chance to make him pay for it with my 2-pair.

3. Complete bluff. Not all that likely, but it's definitely a possibility based on what I know about his style of play.

Well, as I'm pushing my chips in, he flips up his cards and there it is, A-9 of clubs for the "nut flush". I think "nut" is a good word to describe it because it definitely felt like a kick in the nuts. Anyways, with only one more card to go, I have to get another 5 or 7 (4 "outs") for a miracle full house on the river, but it didn't happen, and I was officially out.

As I do with a lot of hands that I get eliminated on, I end up replaying the whole thing in my mind afterwards, trying to figure out if there was anything I could have done to avoid it. I think overall, I played that hand pretty well, but in no-limit hold'em, it's those little things you do or don't do, that make you either a great player or just average to above-average. So here's the questions I wonder about in hindsight:

1. Instead of re-re-raising his $3 re-raise on the flop by $10, should I have just gone all-in at that point (about a $20 raise instead)? Chances are, nothing is going to come on the last 2 cards to help my 5's and 7's, so this is probably the best time to get all my money in there, on the re-raise. I did see the flush draw on the board, but I figured that $10 would be enough to eliminate someone staying for that. Actually, I thought that my original $2 bet should've eliminated anybody drawing at a flush, but apparently I was wrong on both counts. Either way, I wonder if he would have called an all-in regardless, considering he called my $10. I'm pretty sure he knows me as a player who rarely, if ever, re-re-raises $10 on the flop without a strong hand. Hmmm... next time I see him I'll have to ask the question.

2. Or, instead of re-re-raising his $3 re-raise, should I have figured he had 3-of-a-kind and just folded right there? I mean, I really shouldn't have been involved in the hand with a 5-7 to begin with, were it not for the big-blind, so maybe I should've just given it up when someone re-raised my bet. After all, I checked to him first, and with the flush on the board, I was honestly going to check on the last card too, if it came to that. But 2-pair on the flop, even though it was the low pairs, is just really hard for me to let go. I've won a lot of big pots in the past with that hand.

3. Should I have called the last all-in, after the 3rd flush card fell? As I said before, this seemed like a pretty clear decision for me at the time. Having already put more than half my total money in the pot, I felt that the odds were definitely there for me to call the last $10 or so. Also, I definitely don't want to be bluffed in any situation by anyone, so making the call hopefully discourages him (or anyone else watching the hand) from bluffing at me carelessly in the future. But maybe this is a case where I should be more careful about calling all-ins, when I could still be beat by so many hands (other than the flush, I think a possible straight was on the board, he could have the 3-of-a-kind as I mentioned, or even a higher 2-pair). After this experience, maybe I won't consider 2-pairs to be as great of a hand in the future.

Just to clarify to anyone reading this long story, I am not writing this because I'm bitter. Also, if I made the other guy sound like a terrible player, I didn't mean to. Even though statistically, it's a terrible play to put in a lot of money to draw at a flush from the flop (I think it's about 33% to hit), he did have a lot of money and could afford it at that point in the game. And from that point on, he played it right and ended up with all my chips, so I can't not give him props at least for that much.

Finally, I know that from my end, I probably didn't play that hand perfectly, so until I someday hone my poker skills into "Johnny Chan-caliber play", I'd be wise take everything as a learning experience. My goals are gonna be to complain less, to take nothing personally, and to hopefully get better along the way.

So, any constructive criticism from you the reader is welcome, such as "Joe you're such a dumbass" or "you suck". Or, "stop boring us with your sob stories, hold'em is for losers". But, maybe if there happens to be some good discussion and interest in my poker entries, I'll make it a semi-regular thing. In which case, I think I already know what my next "Hold'em Hand of the Day" will be. We'll see.

- Last month, Jerry Manuel was fired as manager of the White Sox. Yesterday, Bill Cartwright was fired as coach of the Bulls. Next in line will probably be Dick Jauron from the Bears. I never thought this city would see the day when the guy with the most job security is the manager of the Cubs.

- Yesterday I signed on to AIM and saw that there were less than half the normal amount of people on my buddy list that were signed on. Is this because all the college kids came home for Thanksgiving break, or was there some nationwide internet outage that I was unaware of?

- Tonight is the final episode of Real World Paris. Some people say that this series sucked because there was "not enough hooking up", but I thought it was very entertaining. I think this was actually the first season of RW that I watched almost every episode of.

*****

Thoughts on Racism

I hate racism. I think most of the civilized world is pretty much agreed that racism is bad, so there's not much point in writing about why it sucks. Instead, I feel like venting about what pisses me off just as much: when overly sensitive people overreact to certain things and call them racist, which aren't really racist.

Example 1: I was reading an article the other day about the dominance of Kenyans in the marathons around the world. A scientific study was done in 2000 by the Danish Sports Science Institute, to see if there was any genetic correlation of why marathons seem to always be won by Kenyans. The study, which provided conclusive results that Kenyans (specifically the Kalenjin tribe) do have a genetic advantage in adaptivity to long distance running, was immediately met with sharp criticism for being racist. In particular, a former champion from Kenya, Kip Keino, was "incensed" by the study's results for implying that Kenyan success in marathons was not purely due to work ethic.

Example 2: During the past baseball season, Dusty Baker was asked by reporters about whether or not the Cubs' schedule was a disadvantage because of all the day games. His reply was something to the tune of, black people were brought over here as slaves in the first place, because of their physical endurance and ability to handle long days in the sun, so he didn't believe the day games were a factor. His statements were instantly blasted by the media, white and black alike, for being racist.

Example 3: A couple months ago, Rush Limbaugh made the statement as an ESPN football analyst that Donovan McNabb was way overrated by the media, which was desperate to see a black quarterback succeed in the NFL. Within days, Limbaugh was out the door of ESPN and labeled a racist for his opinions on the matter.

Now, I'm not necessarily agreeing or disagreeing with anyone in the above examples. That's not really my point. The thing is, all three situations I mentioned involve people being way too sensitive and carelessly using the word "racism" to describe something that, in my mind, is clearly not racist. It just seems like some people are so eager to jump on anything that even remotely implies that different groups are unequal, and make a huge fuss about it.

I think a big part of this is because most of us learned all we know about racism through the public education system, in our elementary school years. All I remember from those days is the constant mantra of "All men are created equal", that slavery was horrible, and that Abraham Lincoln and Martin Luther King were the heroes who made our society so culturally harmonious today. That's all fine and dandy, but I'd have to say that it paints a grossly incomplete picture of what racism is really about.

First of all, even though the founding fathers of this country told us that "all men are created equal", this is obviously not the entire story. If we were all created equal, then why do some of us have darker or lighter skin to begin with? Why are some of us more prone to sickle cell anemia, others to lactose intolerance? Do we all have "equal" amounts of hair, of equal color and texture, distributed in the exact same proportion on our bodies? Even if you just think about those few simple questions, it's easy to see that we are not created equal among races, if only in a sense of physical genetics.

With this in mind, why is it so taboo for people to accept or even discuss something such as the possibility that humans of African origin may have certain advantages when it comes to athletics? I mean, is it really a coincidence that there is such a disproportionately high number of black people in the NBA, NFL, etc.? I understand that a study such as the Danish one I mentioned implies that Kenyans don't win marathons purely because of their training and work ethic, but so what? Facts are facts.

You know, a Korean guy broke the long streak of Kenyans by winning the Boston Marathon in 2001 - where was this highly touted Kenyan work ethic that year, I ask? And on the flip side, doesn't the way the Kenyans responded to the study imply that they think Asians and Whites don't win marathons due to lack of hard work? I should feel insulted! (Of course, I'll be the first to admit that I am too lazy to train for a marathon, so I'll be keeping my mouth shut about that. But maybe Rich or Dennis would have a right to say something, being the marathon trainers they are... now's your time to jump in and give those Kenyans a piece of your minds guys!)

Besides being really annoying to hear the media or "activists" whining about everything all the time, I think this general hypersensitivity of our society towards racism hurts much deeper. When we are constantly calling things racist that aren't real cases of racism, it tends to trivialize the things that actually are racist. It doesn't benefit anyone to scapegoat Rush Limbaugh for the kinds of comments he made, which were, at worst, simply ignorant and misinformed. It might make Jesse Jackson or Louis Farakhan or whoever a hero in the eyes of the public to speak out in this cause, but how would this help the latest victim of a hate crime, for example? How does it help the guy who is about to be passed over for a job, not because he's not qualified, but because he's not white?

Not only this, when people overreact about anything that might remotely be considered racist, it ends hurting everyone more because it stifles any chance of us having a productive discussion on the heart of the subject. And this, in turn, breeds further ignorance and prevents us from ever achieving the one thing that could actually eliminate racism: the ability to fully understand each other and understand the truth.

The bottom line is, whenever the kinds of questions about race come up such as in the examples I mentioned, people should really take the opportunity to think about the situations instead of rushing to judgement. Calling for someone to get fired or demanding a full apology does basically nothing. After all, if someone makes a statement, he obviously must believe in it, otherwise why would he say it in the first place? So what good will firing him or forcefully making him retract it do?

Let's face it, we're never going to get everyone to suddenly stop being racist by simply forcing equality on the entire country. To me, fighting racism isn't about making everyone believe that we're all equal. It's about treating everyone with equal amounts of respect and giving everyone equal opportunities regardless of skin color. And as I mentioned before, the way to achieve this is to promote understanding of each other and of the truth. But if people are so sensitive about the subject to ever talk about or even think about the real issues, then this will never happen. This is why I say that I hate these overly sensitive people just as much as I hate the real racists themselves, because both are responsible for holding us all back from reaching a healthy state of race relations.

*****

Hopefully this entry made some sense. I realize that it is a more intense topic than one might expect on this short week of Thanksgiving, but for some reason I just felt like I needed to get these thoughts off my chest today. And now, it's time for me to go home.

Frickin' Freezin

This morning was so cold. Why didn't anybody warn me in advance about this snow and arctic wind? Just last week, I was walking around just fine, without even having to wear a light jacket, and thinking about washing my car. All of a sudden, I can't even run from my car in the parking lot to the entrance at work today, without having to stop and check to see whether my ears are still attached to my body, or if they froze, cracked off and blew away.

I dread cold weather because it gets harder to wake up in the morning, and then I feel so much lazier when it comes to leaving the house, working out, and just about everything else in general. I'm the kind of person who likes to use these kinds of things as an excuse to avoid doing all kinds of stuff:

"Hmmm.... I should probably go to Jewel and buy some food. Nah, it's too cold, screw it."

"The oil in my car needs to be changed. Nah, it's too cold, screw it."

"I gotta do some laundry soon. Nah, it's too cold, screw it."

One thing that the cold weather might actually push me to do is to get a remote starter for my car. I've been thinking about doing it for a long time (even back when I first got the Maxima), but obviously never followed through. Now, I think I could really use a remote starter to warm up my car in the morning while I eat, or after work while I walk through the parking lot, so I don't have to get in and wait so long for it to heat up. If anyone out there is knowledgeable about remote starters, would like to recommend a certain model to me, and/or help me install it, let me know!

Of course, a good thing that comes with the drop in temperature is the Christmas season. I'm a huge sucker for everything having to do with Christmas. People who have read my blog last year around this time would know this, as I wrote a whole thing on the best Christmas songs, movies, etc., and changed all the colors of this site to shades of red and green. I still haven't gotten around to fixing my archives and stuff, but maybe after writing this I will try to work on my template and find last year's entries.

For me, the Christmas season this year officially started last Friday night. Every day for the past 7 months, I've driven past the intersection on the way to/from work where NW Hwy and Hicks split off, and the area looks pretty boring, nothing special. But coming home late that night from the city, I was so surprised to see that same intersection lit up by all these Christmas lights, strung around all the bushes and trees by the street. I didn't even notice there were bushes and trees there before, but I guess I'm just not too observant about that kind of stuff. Anyways, it looked really cool, and instantly put me in the happy Christmas mood. Props to Palatine township.

This was followed up on Sunday after church, when me and my sister watched one of our favorite all-time movies playing on WGN, Home Alone. Later that day, I noticed that it was on TBS Superstation too. I just love that movie so much, it brings back all these great memories and feelings, especially associated with Christmastime. So if the lights on the trees and stuff weren't enough, watching Home Alone definitely left no further doubt in my mind that Christmas season was here.

In the meantime, it seems that Thanksgiving has been forgotten for the moment. But I know that I won't forget it later this week, when I get to enjoy a much needed long weekend. That's the cool part I realized about Thanksgiving since I started working, is that most of us (sorry P) have a built-in thing to be thankful for. That is, getting the day(s) off for the holiday. Hopefully, I will also find myself thankful for Ahman Green running me out to a huge early lead in one of the Thursday NFL games.

As for the snow, well, I hope it won't affect me as much this year, since I don't have to commute from Darien anymore. Although, now I park outside in the driveway, so that could suck. Either way, I'm pretty sure I'd rather see snow covering the ground, than this "light flurries with no accumulation" BS. The way I see it, if it's gonna snow, and wind is gonna blast it in my face, it better at least look nice and wintery outside.

To sum up:
- It's frickin freezing
- Cold weather makes me lazy
- I need a remote starter
- At least it's Christmas season
- I love Christmas season
- But don't forget about Thanksgiving
- Snow a lot, or not at all

*****

Update: I fixed the archives, and the links to my Christmas entries from last year are as follows:

Christmas DBA Nominations

DBA Winners

While looking for these posts, I discovered a cool feature in the new Blogger interface that lets you search for posts containing certain words. I didn't know you could do that, it would've saved me some time trying to find those Christmas blogs in all the weeks before Christmas (it turns out that I posted them the week of Christmas, how wacky).

Feel the Rush

A list of some of the most exciting rushes in my life, past and present:

- Executing a successful Psi Storm on Marines/Medics/Firebats in Starcraft. I love the sound of all those humans dying at once.

- "Flopping a set" in Hold'em.

- Any time one of my fantasy players scores a TD

- Hearing the new intake roar for the first time when I floored it in my Maxima

- Having an 8oz. Filet Mignon plus King Crab Legs dinner at Bob Chinn's when I'm really hungry

- Being at a great live performance of one of your favorite songs (my personal examples include Red Hot Chili Peppers "Under the Bridge", Britney Spears "You Drive Me Crazy", 311 "Down", and more)

- Loading Piya's blog and seeing a new Choose Your Own Adventure or Stork article

- Making a solid tackle (As some friends know, this was not limited to the football field. But that was in the past, so don't worry anymore)

- Getting an awesome "alone" hand in Euchre

- Nailing a good break in 9-ball (or to a lesser extent, 8-ball), I love hearing that sound and watching the balls go flying

- Jumping off a cliff (into water)

- Pulling off all the shifts perfectly and setting a new time record in Daytona USA Arcade, Advanced or Expert tracks

- Finding an awesome parking spot in the city with time still on the meter (I know Chras feels me on this one)

- Walking out of an ECE exam feeling like I completely owned it (this has not happened very often)

- Last day of school or work before a long vacation

- Arriving at the terminal in O'Hare after a long vacation. Home Sweet Home...

- Finding a really cute BCBG dress on sale (just kidding)

- Entering a classified lab or room here at work

- Washing my hands using my sister's Bath & Body Works Exfoliating soap for the first time

- Ordering stuff online and getting it in the mail

- Climbing trees (haven't done this since I was about 10 years old... anyone wanna go to the Arboretum sometime?)

There's more, but that's all I will list for now.

Routine

When I first stepped into the working world, one of the words that really scared me was "routine". Hearing that word made me picture an old grandpa in a nursing home, who needs to do the same thing and follow the same schedule every day, while having very little variety (or none at all) in his lifestyle. The word also brought to mind the image of a 9-5 corporate peon, as portrayed in the movie Office Space. Waking up each day at the same time to the same alarm clock, just so you can struggle through rush hour traffic to get to work, where you have to deal with the same annoying people and do all the same monotonous chores for 8 hours, then going home tired, having a beer, and collapsing in bed out of sheer exhaustion, only to restart the process the next morning.

Since neither of these lifestyles were particularly appealing to me, I made the promise to myself that I would never let my own life reach such a point of repetition and perpetual tedium. Especially being so fresh out of college, a time when I thoroughly enjoyed a most "unroutine" lifestyle, few things worried me more than getting sucked into a job and a life that was anything close to resembling a routine.

It's now been more than a year since that time, and as I stop to evaulate my current life, I'd have to say that it's a lot different than what I thought I wanted my life to be, based upon last year's standards. Despite consciously trying to avoid turning my life into a routine, I've found that a great deal of what I do every day has nevertheless become exactly that which I originally feared.

From Monday to Friday, my alarm wakes me up at the same time every morning, and I go to sleep at pretty much the same time every night too. I eat the same cereal for breakfast, and basically the same sandwich, chips, and juice for lunch. I shower at the same time, check people's blogs and other websites in pretty much the same order, and I'm even finding myself watching the same TV shows on certain nights of the week, something I never used to do. Even my weekends seem to have some set schedule these days. Saturday, sleep in and go home to Darien in the afternoon, then hang out with friends and/or Olivia. And then Sundays have strictly been a combination of church, football, and cards.

Now, without going through every single detail of my daily schedule, let's just say that it's all a far cry from the days at U of I. Even when I had classes every morning, I always considered waking up for them to be purely optional on my part (in hindsight, not a great policy). I'd eat an average of 1-2 meals a day, if that, and they usually consisted of either Ramen, frozen pizza, or Rice Garden. I'd go to sleep and wake up at any given time, weekdays or weekends regardless. And I rarely watched much TV other than late night Sportscenter reruns or MTV After Hours/Dawn Patrol.

As I've said before, and I'm sure most of my friends would agree, it was this exact characteristic of unpredictability and freedom that made college such a great time. I know that I will always miss those days when the concepts of "schedule" and "routine" seemed as foreign as Chinese TPS reports (don't ask me what that is supposed to mean, I don't know).

But as much as my habits and lifestyle have moved away from the old college ways, I'm surprised to find that I'm not as bothered or worried about this as I originally thought I would be. In fact, I think I'm actually subconsciously starting to crave more routine in my current life. Part of it is, there's a certain comfort in waking up and knowing that there's nothing I'm going to encounter today, that I haven't already encountered and gotten through plenty of times already in the past. Not that every day is exactly the same for me, and I still do face new things all the time. But following a good routine just seems to make life easier, less stressful, and a lot more productive overall. And that is definitely a good thing in my book.

I guess living within the guidelines of my routine means that the days of chaotic college life will be officially left behind. In a way, it does make me sad to let go of all the spontaneity and lack of boundaries that I enjoyed so much. It means there won't be nearly as many wacky stories with me pulling allnighters, sleeping for 16 hours straight on Chras's bed, playing Starcraft or shooting pool instead of studying for a final, or going to class the morning after your 21st birthday. But, it also means that I won't be constantly "learning the hard way" what it's like to work a long 8 hour day after making some unwise decisions the night before. And you know what? I think I'm getting older and mature enough to the point where I'm willing to give up the crazy experiences and the highs and lows for some good old consistency and steadiness in my life.

Of course, I think from my point of view, I can consider my routine lifestyle to be a positive thing largely because it is mostly by my own voluntary choice. I'm still quite wary of ever unwittingly becoming a "slave to routine", and I do believe that if I had my daily schedule imposed on me, my thoughts on the whole thing would be much different. I mean, it's not as if I'm like that guy in Office Space who is forced into a rut by the demands of his job and everything around me. Nor am I the nursing home grandpa, whose habits have become so ingrained through years of repetition that they have formed an unending and unbreakable cycle. Well, not yet, at least.

Maybe it's all a matter of perspective, but I really don't mind living a semi-repetitive life, as long as I feel like I'm still in control and I'm still happy doing what I do. Even if it makes me dull or boring, and people call me "old man" for always having to go home by 11 or earlier, I'm fine with that. Like I said before, I'm getting too old to always be having to recover from the results of my own poor judgement. After all, I'm a boring guy anyways, so hey, I might as well just accept that fact and make the most out of it by getting enough sleep and living healthier while I'm at it, right?

*****

Yesterday I "got in the zone" for $9.88 at Target (that means I bought the new Britney Spears album). I didn't realize Target sold CD's that cheap, I've been getting ripped off at Best Buy all this time!

Anyways, I've only listened to the first 6 or 7 tracks, but so far I'm liking this CD. I was kind of expecting it to suck, after the stuff I've been seeing and hearing on the MTV and ABC specials, and also her song with Madonna blows. But, I'm pretty impressed with the sound and style of the rest of the songs I'm hearing. I'm glad it's not as overtly raunchy as the media has been saying, but it does remind me somewhat of Janet Jackson's Velvet Rope in its edgy qualities. Up to this point, I definitely like this album better than the last CD, which had way too much of the Neptunes influence in my opinion (I never really got into the Neptunes, I thought they were grossly overrated and I still don't like Pharrell's stuff, but I'm sure others will disagree). So yeah, those are my thoughts on the first half of the album, hopefully the second half will not disappoint.

*****

My mom and dad are celebrating their 25th anniversary today. In typical fobby Chinese fashion, they are choosing to commemorate this occasion by inviting me to eat with them at Todai.

I don't know how it is in other families, but having grown up under my parents and watching them go through all the tough times of life, I know that making their marriage last 25 years is no small accomplishment. I feel really lucky and happy to see them reach this point. I know my sister can attest to seeing the many times when everything seemed like it was so close to falling apart or blowing up, but somehow everything stuck together through it all.

For me personally, in this age when divorced and separated couple are more common than those that stay married, seeing my own parents make their marriage work for 25 years really gives me a reason to believe and have faith that I myself can someday get married and make it last too.

- Work has been about as close to "nonstop" as I can imagine since early last week. I'm so happy that next week is Thanksgiving, I could really use a couple days off. I'm also jealous of my sis and all the other U of I kids that get a whole week off, but that's another story.

- Happy birthday to the Goods. Glad to see you and all the whiteys, plus Rod at B-corn on Saturday.

- I am up by 1 pt against Chras going into Monday Night Football. Terrell Owens goes for me, Thai Streets goes for him. I will definitely be watching the game closely tonight, while occasionally checking "Average Joe".

- Over the weekend I finally saw Finding Nemo. It was pretty good, but I still think "Little Mermaid" is the best movie that takes place "under the sea". Even so, I liked a lot of things about this movie. For some reason, the seagulls in this movie were my favorite part. I guess I just thought it was hilarious the way they kept making annoying noises. Also, should I be worried that Olivia kept raving about how awesome Ellen Degeneres was, as the voice of that fish who had no short-term memory? Hmmm.....

Misc

- FINALLY, my fantasy football team got a win against Dave Chan. Even though I was up by 18 with Ahman and Bubba going in MNF against no one on his team, I wanted to wait until it was official before celebrating. I have to admit, I was a tiny bit scared when Ahman kept coughing the ball up in the 1st quarter last night, but good thing my whole team stepped up this week. Not even Steve Bartman could mess this one up.

- My sister has informed me that my screen name on her buddy list has a weird icon next to it when she signs on using AOL.com. She sent me a screenshot to show me, and it looks like this little puddle with a drop of water falling in it. Neither of us have seen that icon before, and we can't figure out what it's supposed to mean. Anyone out there with any ideas about what it is, why it only shows up next to my name and only my name, and why it never showed up until now?

- I helped Olivia move into a new condo over the weekend, and something about seeing her empty place and setting up all her stuff really made me want to buy my own house sometime soon. I think I will write more about this in the near future, my thoughts on eventually becoming a homeowner.

- The show "Average Joe" on NBC intrigues me. So far I have watched the first 2 episodes, and I don't know how to feel about it. The guys are all such tools, which makes for lots of funny situations, but then it gets a little uncomfortable at times too, cause you have to kind of feel sorry for them at some point. Then the girl, I feel bad for her too, but then I don't, because she is full of that "beauty is from within" and "looks don't matter" crap that all girls like to say but very few truly believe. I guess now is her chance to finally prove that she means what she says. Well, even though the show isn't that great, I think I will continue watching as long as it doesn't get canceled, at least to the point where they introduce the "new twist" that will supposedly change the entire game.

Top 10 Girls

I've made a bunch of lists in the past on my blog, covering a wide range of topics, but one major list I haven't posted is my top 10 hottest chicks. The main reason is, the list fluctuates a lot, and also, there's so many pretty ladies it's hard to narrow it down to just 10, without leaving someone out or forgetting someone. I probably sound like Ross in that one episode of Friends when he meets that one European celebrity after booting her off his list. But anyways, the comments in my last blog inspired me to finally buckle down, commit to a current list and post it for reference.

* Disclaimer: It might make me look superficial to be doing this, but please do not take this list too seriously and bash me for objectifying women.

10. Jennifer Aniston - I think I might be weird in this way, but there's a special place in my heart for nice female arms, and she has nice arms. Oh, her face and the rest of her body aren't too shabby either.

9. Heidi Klum - I like rosy cheeks too. Maybe it's just how she does her makeup, but in my view, that is the main characteristic that sets her apart from the others on this list.

8. Beyonce - Recently moved into the top 10. Before, I didn't think I was ready for that jelly, her body was so bootylicious.

7. Jennifer Lopez - Annoying as hell, but you gotta admit that she's top 10 worthy.

6. Aaliyah - Wasn't sure if I should include her, considering she's not even alive anymore, but I was always a huge admirer. Perhaps if she didn't die in the plane crash, she would be top 5. I don't know how the rules of my own list work.

5. Leann Tweeden - I don't know where she came from, but mostly I just see her hosting this one show on Fox Sports for extreme sports or something. I'm surprised she isn't on more guys' lists, cause she is definitely good.

4. Kristin Kreuk - She makes me want to watch Smallville and buy Neutrogena. However, I still don't do either. Sorry Kristin.

3. Posh Spice - Two words: SPICE-AY

2. Jessica Alba - Hmmm... looking at my top 10, I notice that 3 are married and one is dead. Yet, this has zero impact on the odds of me ever getting to date any of them.

1. Macy Gray - She's tasty and smokin fine!! Just kidding, again. That joke will get old eventually. Anyways, I'm sure you all knew all along the real #1 was gonna be...

1. Britney Spears - No doubt about this one. She has been #1 unofficially for the past 5 years or so. She's got that something, what can I do? By the way, check out the following site, it is intriguing and somewhat unsettling at the same time: http://mirrored.flabber.nl/britney.lookalike

*****

One thing about the list, there are noticably no Asians included, even though I have seen more than a few good looking yellow celebrities from my time spent across the Pacific that would have easily made my list. The reason I didn't list them is because 1) I don't know their names and 2) Nobody would know who I was talking about anyways.

It makes me sad that there are basically no truly good looking Asian chicks in American culture, because I have an Asian fetish. har har. Seriously though, the only one everyone always says is Lucy Liu, is that the best you can do? I guess she's not entirely horrible, especially compared to the other poor showings like Suchin Pak, Kristi Yamaguchi, and Lisa Ling (ruff ruff!), but I don't see how you could consider her to be pretty. Eyes way too chinky for my taste, among other things. She does salvage some points for being a fellow freckled Asian like me, but that is relatively minor.

So come on, Asia, where you at? I know you got more talent than what we're seeing over here. For starters, it's common knowledge that Taiwan alone is stocked to the core with the most beautiful people in the world, but we're just talking a tiny island here, out of an entire continent. What about Korea, I know there's more good old fashioned hotness like Hyori from Fin.K.L or Kim Hee Sun out there. Sung Hi Lee is a start, but a little too slutty. For whatever reason, Asia's just not representing all of its best over here, what can you do?

*****

At least Illinois and Arizona college basketball fans have one thing in common: we all hate Duke. The latest reason being high school recruit Shaun Livingston's decision to choose Duke over Illinois and Arizona. I've been requested by a certain Wildcats fan to relay the following message in my blog: "Livingston is a turd".

*****

Triumph the Insult Dog has an album now, called "Come Poop With Me". His first single is "I Keed" and it is pretty funny. I think I will have to pick up a copy of the CD sometime soon. For more, see http://www.triumphtheinsultcomicdog.com

Thoughts of a Old Home Video Watcher, and more

- Over the weekend when I was home in Darien, my family was watching some old home videos from the year we lived in Taiwan (1995). It really is amazing to see how much has changed in the past 8 or 9 years of my life. Physically, I was a 5 foot tall boy with a high voice and these huge nerdy glasses. It was my freshman year of high school at Taipei American School (TAS), and I was taking classes like Japanese 1 and Introduction to Computer Programming with Quick BASIC 4.5, taught by Mr. Paulson. In my free time, I would take the bus to the area in Taipei where all the pirated computer stuff was being sold at the time and hang out there, or go to the arcade and play Daytona USA for hours. I lived in this tiny room with no more than a desk, closet, bed, and computer, with my only source of entertainment being a mini basketball hoop. Now that I think about it, I still live in a tiny room with just a desk, closet, bed, and computer. The only thing is, I have no mini-basketball hoop, but I do have a TV.

Meanwhile, my sister was this bratty but interesting little kid, who liked to sing the jingle from the Taiwanese commercial for Juicy Fruit gum (OK I'll admit, I liked to sing it too). She was always getting yelled at by my mom for everything from not studying enough to eating too much junk food. I remember she even used to get yelled at because my mom didn't like her wasting time twirling her pen. Also, she was obsessed with Mariah Carey and had a crush on a guy named Mark at school.

Anyways, enough about that, I'm sure nobody cares to read about more of my old experiences. But I do wish that I had kept a blog or journal from back then, that I could go back and read about life through the eyes of 15-year old Joe. Hopefully, this blog I'm writing in right now will last for a long time, and I'll be able to someday come back and read about life through the eyes of 23-year old Joe.

- Another thought that struck me after watching the old videos was, how long time seemed to drag on back then. It was only about one year I lived in Taiwan, but I remember it as feeling like forever. Now, I've been at this company for over a year, and it honestly feels like the year passed in no more than the blink of an eye. When we first moved back, we had to stay at the house of our family friends for one semester school until we bought a place of our own. That also felt like a really long time, but semesters seemed to just fly by in college. Then I see the people here at work who are celebrating like 40 years of service, and I wonder if those 40 years felt like 40 years. Like, can they go back and identify any individual year and talk about what was so special about each year? Or does it all run together like one big blurry chunk of life experience?

I mean, most of us at this age can look back and pretty clearly define the different stages throughout their lives in 2-3 year blocks of time. Such as going through puberty, being a high school underclassman, when you wore braces, the rebellious stage, the awkward stage, etc. I know I could probably pretty easily tell you about each stage of my life in pretty good detail. But, how are we going to define the next 40 years of our lives? Will our 2-3 year long stages be stretched out to 5-10 year divisions? Is it simply going to be "twenty-something", then "thirty-something", and so on? And other than scattered big events that happen only once every few years, like getting married and having kids, changing jobs and moving, or retirement, what is actually going to distinguish one year from the next, during the rest of our lives?

- This morning while eating my daily cereal, I watched some of Star Wars Episode 2 which was showing on HBO. It reminded me of how terrible that kid is who plays Anakin Skywalker. Not that the acting in the originals was that great ("But I wanted to go to Tashi Station to pick up some power converters!!"), but how do you pair up the glorious Natalie Portman with that chump? It's just wrong...

- We should play football sometime soon. I probably can't this Saturday, but hopefully we'll be able to figure out a time that works for people in the near future, because I'm getting out of shape and I feel like playing. If anyone wants to get people together, feel free to do so, otherwise, you can all just let me know when would be a good day and I can try to set up a game. It should be easier than organizing softball, because we don't need as many people and equipment. So let's do it.

Fantasy Football Talk

It has now been about 2 months since my most recent loss (in a long string of losses) to Dave Chan in fantasy football. My all-time record against him stands at 0-8. Nevertheless, as our next matchup approaches this coming Sunday, I remain hopeful that maybe, just maybe, this will finally be the week that I break the curse. Also, not that beating Dave isn't important enough in itself, but the fantasy implications are big for me too. A win would put my team in a tie for 3rd and keep my season's hopes alive. A loss, probably put me in 7th and out of any realistic shot at contending for this year. Not to mention, I gotta wait until next season for another shot at breaking the curse. GO DUDALISKS! DON'T SEND ME HOME CRYING YET AGAIN!

Decision time (need to pick 4 of the following):

Santana Moss (@Oak)
Andre Johnson (@Cin)
T.J. Duckett (@NYG)
Olandis Gary (Chi)
Moe Williams (@SD)
Darrell Jackson (@Was)
Rod Gardner (Sea)
Justin Gage (@Det)

My thoughts on the situation:

I'm pretty sure I'll start Santana Moss, based on his performance and the BET factor. The Moe Williams story is a little bit spicy because Michael Bennett is being phased back from his injury, and Dave happens to be starting him against me. So, I could either start Moe and hope for some "kick in the balls" factor if he steals goal-line TDs from Bennett, or just avoid gambling on the situation and start someone else. Considering all the bad luck I've had in the past matchups, I'm leaning towards the latter.

Olandis and Gage are probably the weakest starts of that list, but I'm tempted to start them so I can watch my players on the local Bears game broadcast. I figure, if my players are gonna suck, I might as well watch them suck and be able throw stuff at the TV in anger. Also, I like Justin Gage's name. "Enemy approaching... what are your orders, General?" "Just In-Gage!!" harharhar

Other than that, I think Andre's Johnsons, T.J. Suckett, D-Jax, and Prod Gardner are pretty much a toss up. I'll probably end up making my decision by picking 4 names out of a hat. Seriously.

I might have to make a decision on my 3 defense guys too:

Brian Urlacher (@Det)
Roy Williams (Buf)
Ken Hamlin (@Was)
Derrick Brooks (Car)
Simeon Rice (Car)

I used to think Urlacher was a must-start, but he hasn't done jack for me this year. Too busy making crappy commercials, wearing his orange shoes, and dating Paris Hilton, I guess. How do you sleep at night, Brian, knowing that you are letting me down? "On top of a pile of money with many beautiful ladies"

Realistically, I will probably still start Urlacher, even with his mediocre play this season and knowing that he always gets owned by Cory Schlesinger. Roy will also probably start, and Hamlin is pretty much a non-factor at this point. So that leaves Derrick and Simeon Rice for the last spot. Derrick should get more tackles and would add another "kick in the balls" factor against Dave, with the McNown league history and all. But then again, Simeon Rice went to Playa University. The guy is averaging about a sack per game, and might be ready to bust out with some more big plays this week.

Top: First pair of glasses I ever had. Large, plastic, nerdy, but durable

Middle: Forgot to mention this pair in my original blog, but Piya's basketball story reminded me. Notice one side is broken off and there is a big blob of superglue that was obviously not enough to keep it connected to the rest.

Bottom: The soldered pair I talked about, broke at the bridge.