Voices In My Head
"YEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAHH!!!" - Lil' Jon (or Dave Chappelle as Lil' Jon)
"Are you a pothead, Focker?" - Robert DeNiro
"I see you look me up and down... I know you want my bod-ay" - Beyonce
"Even my boogers are spicy" - Ralph Wiggum
"To play your messages, press 1" - T-Mobile Voicemail Lady
"So when Rigby got his samples back from the laboratory, he made a startling discovery! What he believed to be igneous, was in fact, sedimentary!" - Ross Gellar (in fake British accent)
"Oh no, Mike Wallace, RUN!!" - Chris Rock
"Do it... doooo it" - D. Ciszek
"GAAAAAS he gone" - Hawk Harrelson
"Too much for you!" - Scotty Nguyen
"My salsa makes all the pretty girls want to dance and take off their underpants, my salsa.... my salsa" - Eminem
"EEEE-mails, send in your emails, EEEE-mails, we read your emails..." - Mancow jingle
"Screw you guys, I'm going home!" - Cartman
Friday, April 23, 2004
Pat Tillman Killed in Action
I remember hearing about this guy a year or two ago when he decided to leave the NFL in the prime of his career to serve his country. Even then, they were talking about how it was gonna be a serious role with real implications (not some silly thing like Tiger Woods doing Green Beret training for 3 days). But I still figured it was the media hyping up a story.
It doesn't get much more real or serious than getting killed in combat fighting for your country. This man gave up millions of dollars and a comfortable life to defend all of us from the evil people in this world. Reading a story like this makes me feel so unworthy of his sacrifice and for the sacrifices of all our soldiers who give up their lives across the globe to defend our way of life.
*****
Meanwhile, we have this little punk college kid Eli Manning who decides he doesn't want to be drafted by San Diego cause they're not gonna be winners. What kind of messed up retarded business is that?
I remember hearing about this guy a year or two ago when he decided to leave the NFL in the prime of his career to serve his country. Even then, they were talking about how it was gonna be a serious role with real implications (not some silly thing like Tiger Woods doing Green Beret training for 3 days). But I still figured it was the media hyping up a story.
It doesn't get much more real or serious than getting killed in combat fighting for your country. This man gave up millions of dollars and a comfortable life to defend all of us from the evil people in this world. Reading a story like this makes me feel so unworthy of his sacrifice and for the sacrifices of all our soldiers who give up their lives across the globe to defend our way of life.
*****
Meanwhile, we have this little punk college kid Eli Manning who decides he doesn't want to be drafted by San Diego cause they're not gonna be winners. What kind of messed up retarded business is that?
Tuesday, April 20, 2004
One other bad part about the weekend was when I watched Honey. I wasn't expecting much, and it still sucked more than I thought it would. I think, in all seriousness, the only good acting in the whole movie came from Missy Elliott.
This week at work, I'm officially being transferred from the Systems Engineering group to the Analog Design group. That means new bosses, new projects, probably new desk. I really liked my old bosses in the past year and a half I've been here, but I think this will be a good change for me. Well, at least I hope it will.
Seems like for a lot of people who graduated and started working in 2002 like me, this is a time when a lot is changing for us career wise. Either we're getting restless after getting a taste of what the next 10, 20, or 30 years of life might be like at this job, or circumstances outside of our own control are dictating the shakeups that are happening or about to happen.
In either case, it's a less than desirable situation which also serves as yet another reminder to each of us that the real world is tough. Our college days are long behind us, and life isn't getting any easier.
You know, it still hasn't completely hit me yet that I'm already 24 years old. It's scary sometimes to think about what that means. For starters, I've seen a lot of people my age or younger who have already been buying houses, getting engaged, pursuing and/or achieving advanced degrees, things like that. And that's just among the people I know personally.
When I look at the NBA and see someone like LeBron James come in at age 18, it's crazy to think about how much younger he is than me, and how incredibly good he's gonna get by the time he's my age (in 6 years). I mean, the kid is barely out of high school, and he's already signed contracts that will pay him more money during this next year than I might save in an entire lifetime.
It's not that I'm focused on the money. I don't think I need to ever become a millionaire or billionaire to be happy in life. Like when I see someone such as Donald Trump, it's not his money or his power or even his fame that appeals to me. I don't envy his tacky looking house even if it did cost millions to build and furnish, nor do I wish to be surrounded by people who kiss my ass all day, every day.
But I can't help but admire him for accomplishing so much throughout his life. He started as just one man in this world, just like any one of us, but through years of hard work he managed to build an empire of his own. Now he's got these huge skyscrapers and casinos bearing his name. How many of us can claim anything like that on our resume?
Do I want to build a "Chen Tower" as my life's work or own a famous golf course? No, I really don't. All I'm saying is that it shows how much one person can do in just one lifetime. And it almost makes me feel stupid that I spend most of my days worrying about the weather, fantasy baseball, or how I'm going to spend my weekend.
From what I've heard, the late twenties is when a typical man starts to really get serious about his career, and think about what he wants to accomplish with his life. If that's so, then I guess I still have a good 3-4 years to putz around before panic time officially arrives. But then I keep hearing the same old voice in my head: youth is wasted on the young. If I want to do truly great things with this life, why wait until I'm past my prime to start pursuing them?
I only wish that right now, I knew what my purpose was and what I'm supposed to be seeking after. I do believe that I'm destined to someday do great things, I just don't know what those things are. The real question to ask at this point is, if I did know what I'm supposed to achieve 10 or 20 years from now, how should I be living my life differently today in order to prepare myself for that?
Anyways, I started all this talking about the changes going on at my job and those of my friends (actually I started with talking about how Honey sucked but oh well). For myself, the changes aren't going to be drastic, but I'm still feeling a little nervous about what's in store. For those of you who have either recently started a new career path, or have a lot of uncertainty going on with the place you're currently working, I really hope everything works out for the best for all of you guys in the end. Other than that, I don't know what else I can say. But if any of you need any help from me in any way, or just want to hang out and talk about life and stuff, I'll try my best to schedule you in to my busy life. Har har.
This week at work, I'm officially being transferred from the Systems Engineering group to the Analog Design group. That means new bosses, new projects, probably new desk. I really liked my old bosses in the past year and a half I've been here, but I think this will be a good change for me. Well, at least I hope it will.
Seems like for a lot of people who graduated and started working in 2002 like me, this is a time when a lot is changing for us career wise. Either we're getting restless after getting a taste of what the next 10, 20, or 30 years of life might be like at this job, or circumstances outside of our own control are dictating the shakeups that are happening or about to happen.
In either case, it's a less than desirable situation which also serves as yet another reminder to each of us that the real world is tough. Our college days are long behind us, and life isn't getting any easier.
You know, it still hasn't completely hit me yet that I'm already 24 years old. It's scary sometimes to think about what that means. For starters, I've seen a lot of people my age or younger who have already been buying houses, getting engaged, pursuing and/or achieving advanced degrees, things like that. And that's just among the people I know personally.
When I look at the NBA and see someone like LeBron James come in at age 18, it's crazy to think about how much younger he is than me, and how incredibly good he's gonna get by the time he's my age (in 6 years). I mean, the kid is barely out of high school, and he's already signed contracts that will pay him more money during this next year than I might save in an entire lifetime.
It's not that I'm focused on the money. I don't think I need to ever become a millionaire or billionaire to be happy in life. Like when I see someone such as Donald Trump, it's not his money or his power or even his fame that appeals to me. I don't envy his tacky looking house even if it did cost millions to build and furnish, nor do I wish to be surrounded by people who kiss my ass all day, every day.
But I can't help but admire him for accomplishing so much throughout his life. He started as just one man in this world, just like any one of us, but through years of hard work he managed to build an empire of his own. Now he's got these huge skyscrapers and casinos bearing his name. How many of us can claim anything like that on our resume?
Do I want to build a "Chen Tower" as my life's work or own a famous golf course? No, I really don't. All I'm saying is that it shows how much one person can do in just one lifetime. And it almost makes me feel stupid that I spend most of my days worrying about the weather, fantasy baseball, or how I'm going to spend my weekend.
From what I've heard, the late twenties is when a typical man starts to really get serious about his career, and think about what he wants to accomplish with his life. If that's so, then I guess I still have a good 3-4 years to putz around before panic time officially arrives. But then I keep hearing the same old voice in my head: youth is wasted on the young. If I want to do truly great things with this life, why wait until I'm past my prime to start pursuing them?
I only wish that right now, I knew what my purpose was and what I'm supposed to be seeking after. I do believe that I'm destined to someday do great things, I just don't know what those things are. The real question to ask at this point is, if I did know what I'm supposed to achieve 10 or 20 years from now, how should I be living my life differently today in order to prepare myself for that?
Anyways, I started all this talking about the changes going on at my job and those of my friends (actually I started with talking about how Honey sucked but oh well). For myself, the changes aren't going to be drastic, but I'm still feeling a little nervous about what's in store. For those of you who have either recently started a new career path, or have a lot of uncertainty going on with the place you're currently working, I really hope everything works out for the best for all of you guys in the end. Other than that, I don't know what else I can say. But if any of you need any help from me in any way, or just want to hang out and talk about life and stuff, I'll try my best to schedule you in to my busy life. Har har.
Monday, April 19, 2004
- Happy Bdays to Amol and Anuj
- Thanks again to Rich, Vira, and Olivia for taking care of a spitting, puking 145 pound rock this weekend. I still don't know what exactly was in those 2 beers and 3 shots at Transit, but in my entire life my body has never reacted the way it did to those 5 drinks on Saturday. I'm not talking about just that night, but the entire day after and even up through this morning. Not that it makes it ok, but I know I have had 3 or 4 times as many drinks as that during more than a few experiences in the past, and not once have I ever:
1. Had completely no memory of significant portions of the night. I'm talking zero recall at all, and not even a sense of familiarity even when people tell me exactly what happened or specific things I said and did.
2. Continued to feel sick for more than 24 hours afterwards. It hasn't felt anything like a normal hangover either (I've had my share of those), but an entirely debilitating feeling of being bedridden for a whole day, while not being able to eat or drink much of anything at all.
So yeah, I don't know if there was something bad in those drinks (other than Miller Lite, 3 Wise Men, or Jaegar), or if I ate something bad earlier in the day, or if I'm just getting too old for any drinking at all. Maybe my liver is collapsed and shriveled or something. But honestly, I don't know how I could have avoided that experience. I think the only way to be sure that never happens again is to cut off alcohol completely. Or at least cut off taking any shots. I don't know what I'll decide to do, but I really don't want to ever go through something like this weekend ever again (let alone put my friends through it with me), so I'm definitely gonna have to make some changes.
- On a lighter note, I hate UPS. They tried delivering a package to my house 3 times and no one was there to sign for it, so they sent a notice in the mail telling me to pick it up. I get the notice about 2 days before the date is listed when it will get returned to sender. So I call the number asking them to forward the package from Westmont (near Darien) to the UPS center in Palatine (which is literally about 1 minute away from the townhouse here). The stupid lady on the phone tells me they can't do that. I'm like, how worthless can a shipping company be, if it doesn't have the ability to even ship a package from one of its own centers to another??
So eventually, I give up on that effort and ask if the lady can just hold the package there for a little bit longer than 2 days, since it's not easy for me to get to Westmont before their daily closing time. She says fine, and extends the Return to Sender date a week. Finally, I find a day when I can go to the stupid Westmont UPS center after work, driving about 50 mins to get there. This is when the high school kid working there informs me that the manager at their location is especially strict about not letting people extend the Return to Sender date. Thus she decided to send it back anyways, overriding my request to extend that date.
In the end, I wasted hours of my time with nothing to show for it. I've given up on getting whatever this package that "Citibank" wants to send me because of all the frustration that they caused me.
- One thing I've been wondering about Donald Trump, why in the world is he doing endorsements? What can they possibly be paying him, a man supposedly worth billions of dollars, to make it worth his while to do a Verizon commercial or whatever? You'd think that to a guy who's used to building huge skyscrapers and owning casinos, getting paid a few million bucks would seem like chump change.
- A quick update on Parry Shen, he says that he'll be at U of I to speak on April 27th (next Tuesday). I won't be able to make it (gotta work), but I'm just letting people know in case they are still interested in going.
- Thanks again to Rich, Vira, and Olivia for taking care of a spitting, puking 145 pound rock this weekend. I still don't know what exactly was in those 2 beers and 3 shots at Transit, but in my entire life my body has never reacted the way it did to those 5 drinks on Saturday. I'm not talking about just that night, but the entire day after and even up through this morning. Not that it makes it ok, but I know I have had 3 or 4 times as many drinks as that during more than a few experiences in the past, and not once have I ever:
1. Had completely no memory of significant portions of the night. I'm talking zero recall at all, and not even a sense of familiarity even when people tell me exactly what happened or specific things I said and did.
2. Continued to feel sick for more than 24 hours afterwards. It hasn't felt anything like a normal hangover either (I've had my share of those), but an entirely debilitating feeling of being bedridden for a whole day, while not being able to eat or drink much of anything at all.
So yeah, I don't know if there was something bad in those drinks (other than Miller Lite, 3 Wise Men, or Jaegar), or if I ate something bad earlier in the day, or if I'm just getting too old for any drinking at all. Maybe my liver is collapsed and shriveled or something. But honestly, I don't know how I could have avoided that experience. I think the only way to be sure that never happens again is to cut off alcohol completely. Or at least cut off taking any shots. I don't know what I'll decide to do, but I really don't want to ever go through something like this weekend ever again (let alone put my friends through it with me), so I'm definitely gonna have to make some changes.
- On a lighter note, I hate UPS. They tried delivering a package to my house 3 times and no one was there to sign for it, so they sent a notice in the mail telling me to pick it up. I get the notice about 2 days before the date is listed when it will get returned to sender. So I call the number asking them to forward the package from Westmont (near Darien) to the UPS center in Palatine (which is literally about 1 minute away from the townhouse here). The stupid lady on the phone tells me they can't do that. I'm like, how worthless can a shipping company be, if it doesn't have the ability to even ship a package from one of its own centers to another??
So eventually, I give up on that effort and ask if the lady can just hold the package there for a little bit longer than 2 days, since it's not easy for me to get to Westmont before their daily closing time. She says fine, and extends the Return to Sender date a week. Finally, I find a day when I can go to the stupid Westmont UPS center after work, driving about 50 mins to get there. This is when the high school kid working there informs me that the manager at their location is especially strict about not letting people extend the Return to Sender date. Thus she decided to send it back anyways, overriding my request to extend that date.
In the end, I wasted hours of my time with nothing to show for it. I've given up on getting whatever this package that "Citibank" wants to send me because of all the frustration that they caused me.
- One thing I've been wondering about Donald Trump, why in the world is he doing endorsements? What can they possibly be paying him, a man supposedly worth billions of dollars, to make it worth his while to do a Verizon commercial or whatever? You'd think that to a guy who's used to building huge skyscrapers and owning casinos, getting paid a few million bucks would seem like chump change.
- A quick update on Parry Shen, he says that he'll be at U of I to speak on April 27th (next Tuesday). I won't be able to make it (gotta work), but I'm just letting people know in case they are still interested in going.
Thursday, April 15, 2004
Longest Voicemail Ever
A few days ago, I got the longest voicemail of my life. Apparently it was left by a bunch of my idiot friends using someone's conference call feature and then deciding to have an entire conversation with each other while on my voicemail. I deleted it right away, so I'm probably forgetting a lot of the message, but the following should be enough to give everyone the gist of how retarded some of my friends are.
You have 1 unheard voice message. To play your message press 1
[I press 1]
Will: Dudo...
Andy: Dudo....
Shubes: Dudo...
John: Dudo....
Will: We're going to Dakota's in Schaumburg, meet us there
Andy: Yeah meet us there you lil bitch
Will: We got a special appearance by your old friend Peepo tonight
John: And Barbario might be there
Shubes: Oh wait, isn't he playing cards at Dave's tonight
Andy: Should we go play cards first then and go to Dakotas after?
Will: No, I'm not gonna play cards tonight
Shubes: Why not?
Will: I only like cards on Thursday, people drink on Thursday
Andy: Ok no cards then, lets just meet in Schaumburg
Will: Alright whose house should we meet at
Andy: Who has a bigger driveway?
John: I don't know
[about a minute's worth of arguing about driveways]
Andy: Jim are you even coming out?
Shubes: I don't know yet, I gotta do taxes
Andy: Man, just have your mom do your taxes for you
Will: No just go to [some tax website], it's free
Shubes: Nah man, just call me later, I'll come out if I can get my taxes done
Andy: Shibby. You pussy...
[another minute of Andy trying to convince Shubes to come out]
Will: Yo we're still on Dudo's voicemail
Andy: Hahaha oh yeah... I think we should go to Dave's first, then it'll be easier to get Dudo to go out
Will: I don't wanna play cards yo
Andy: Why not you shibby
Will: I told you, nobody drinks unless it's Thursday night
[another minute of mindless arguing amongst themselves]
Andy: Haha we're still recording on Dudo's voicemail
Shubes: How long has it been
Andy: Like 5 minutes
Will: So what we doing?
Andy: Let's just go to Dakota's, where we meeting at?
[voicemail finally cuts off]
To delete this message, press 7
[fastest pressing of 7 I've ever done for any voicemail]
I look at my phone, time of call was 5:33. I still can't believe I listened through a 5 minute long voicemail.
*****
Since everyone else has been quoting Chappelle, I'll throw in my favorite from the Wayne Brady episode: "Ohhh no, no, noooo.... is Wayne Brady gonna have to choke a bitch?"
Haha.... hilarious.
*****
I almost let myself believe that maybe this year, Billy Krotch would not suck. Sure didn't take him long to blow up, that's all I can say. Thankfully we came back to win that game, bless Joe Crede and his crappy skills. And as I'm typing this blog, Magglio just jacked one to give my beloved White Sox their second straight last-at-bat victory. I LOVE BASEBALL
A few days ago, I got the longest voicemail of my life. Apparently it was left by a bunch of my idiot friends using someone's conference call feature and then deciding to have an entire conversation with each other while on my voicemail. I deleted it right away, so I'm probably forgetting a lot of the message, but the following should be enough to give everyone the gist of how retarded some of my friends are.
You have 1 unheard voice message. To play your message press 1
[I press 1]
Will: Dudo...
Andy: Dudo....
Shubes: Dudo...
John: Dudo....
Will: We're going to Dakota's in Schaumburg, meet us there
Andy: Yeah meet us there you lil bitch
Will: We got a special appearance by your old friend Peepo tonight
John: And Barbario might be there
Shubes: Oh wait, isn't he playing cards at Dave's tonight
Andy: Should we go play cards first then and go to Dakotas after?
Will: No, I'm not gonna play cards tonight
Shubes: Why not?
Will: I only like cards on Thursday, people drink on Thursday
Andy: Ok no cards then, lets just meet in Schaumburg
Will: Alright whose house should we meet at
Andy: Who has a bigger driveway?
John: I don't know
[about a minute's worth of arguing about driveways]
Andy: Jim are you even coming out?
Shubes: I don't know yet, I gotta do taxes
Andy: Man, just have your mom do your taxes for you
Will: No just go to [some tax website], it's free
Shubes: Nah man, just call me later, I'll come out if I can get my taxes done
Andy: Shibby. You pussy...
[another minute of Andy trying to convince Shubes to come out]
Will: Yo we're still on Dudo's voicemail
Andy: Hahaha oh yeah... I think we should go to Dave's first, then it'll be easier to get Dudo to go out
Will: I don't wanna play cards yo
Andy: Why not you shibby
Will: I told you, nobody drinks unless it's Thursday night
[another minute of mindless arguing amongst themselves]
Andy: Haha we're still recording on Dudo's voicemail
Shubes: How long has it been
Andy: Like 5 minutes
Will: So what we doing?
Andy: Let's just go to Dakota's, where we meeting at?
[voicemail finally cuts off]
To delete this message, press 7
[fastest pressing of 7 I've ever done for any voicemail]
I look at my phone, time of call was 5:33. I still can't believe I listened through a 5 minute long voicemail.
*****
Since everyone else has been quoting Chappelle, I'll throw in my favorite from the Wayne Brady episode: "Ohhh no, no, noooo.... is Wayne Brady gonna have to choke a bitch?"
Haha.... hilarious.
*****
I almost let myself believe that maybe this year, Billy Krotch would not suck. Sure didn't take him long to blow up, that's all I can say. Thankfully we came back to win that game, bless Joe Crede and his crappy skills. And as I'm typing this blog, Magglio just jacked one to give my beloved White Sox their second straight last-at-bat victory. I LOVE BASEBALL
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